Erasing
by Clodilla
Summary: Mass Effect, FemShep. No one is prepared for what the battle on Eden Prime and the chase for Saren and the Reapers will bring. UPDATED 1 November - first part of Chapter 5 is up! Please R and R!
1. InProcessing

Author's Notes: Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's been awhile. Divorce and job chaos will do that to a girl. Nevertheless, I'm nearly finished with my Korriban chapter (yay!), but the latest from Bioware has stolen my heart. No matter how weird it sounded to hear Carth's voice coming out of Kaidan at first, I managed to adjust.

Updated: Thanks to everyone who R&R'd the draft chapter. Regarding the name of the story, 'Erasing', I was mostly motivated by the major theme in the game of synthetics seeking to wipe out organics, the cycle of Reaper extinctions, and their desire to 'erase' the current iteration of organic life from the galaxy. A number of the characters also have pasts they'd rather forget or leave behind, Kaidan and Wrex most notably, but also my version of Shepard (Earthborn). It's still a working title, and I may change it as I get more into the main story.

Chapter 1 - In-Processing

"Running diagnostic. Stand by."

The display screen in front of Lieutenant Kaidan Alenko filled with numbers and symbols, scrolling so quickly even his trained eye was hard pressed to keep up with the results of the test Joker was running. All the weapons systems checks were coming back green, just as they had the dozen or so times they'd run them over the last few days. He wasn't about to let his concentration slip – this was going to be an important tour, a shakedown cruise for the Alliance Military's newest ship. Not that the _Normandy_ was just another ship off the production line – it was a prototype, a hybrid human/Turian design that also happened to incorporate the largest drive core ever installed on anything smaller than a carrier and an experimental stealth system. Even so, in spite of all the strange new control panels and sensors demanding his attention he was starting to feel a little bored.

The comm station next to the display screen squawked. "Ah, Lieutenant?"

"Yes, Joker?'

"Can you come up here for a minute?"

Kaidan glanced back at the screen – still an unending streak of passed checks. "On my way."

The pilot's station was located at the front of the ship, just up the stairs from the weapon officer's station. The _Normandy_ was a small ship, just a frigate, so it took only about a minute to get from one end to the other. Three days ago it would have been a thirty second trip but the crew had nearly doubled in size since then, slowing him as he dodged and weaved through groups of new marines getting their orientation tour. There were now nearly eighty sailors and marines on board, enough for a fully-staffed two-shift cruise – which did strike Kaidan as strange, since the Standard Operating Procedures for shakedown cruises only called for two half-staffed shifts. He strode past navigation and the bullpen, passing the airlock on his left as he headed into the cockpit and looked down at the dirty old ballcap that seemed permanently grafted onto Joker's head. "Something wrong with the systems?"

"Nope," Joker said, shaking his head. "Just my eyesight."

Kaidan frowned. "Don't you have to pass a 20/20 uncorrected vision test every month?"

"Yes, and I did, just last week," Joker replied. "But I don't believe I'm seeing what my eyes are telling me I'm seeing, so I thought I'd get a second opinion." He gestured at a display screen off to his left, which was showing not a steady stream of test results but a live camera relay from the docking platform outside. Captain Anderson and a small company of marines were saluting a woman dressed in battle fatigues, her brown hair pulled up tightly into a regulation topknot. The light caught the silver thread of a Commander's insignia on her fatigues as she returned the salute. Lowering her arm she glanced around, taking in the ship, looking straight at the camera as Captain Anderson stepped towards her –

"No way." Kaidan's eyes widened as he caught sight of the name patch just below her right shoulder.

Joker chuckled. "Given the statistical improbability of you and I sharing the same hallucination at the same time, I guess that really is Commander Shepard." He toggled a few buttons on the screen, magnifying the video image of Shepard and Anderson shaking hands. "She must be reporting as the XO."

"Commander Elizabeth Shepard," Kaidan murmured. Hero of the Blitz, savoir of the colony at Elysium, winner of the Star of Terra…she was arguably the most famous servicemember of any stripe in the entire Alliance.

"I gotta say," Joker continued, studying the image on the screen more closely, "She's pretty smokin'." Kaidan glanced reflexively at her silhouette, feeling a sudden sweat underneath the collar of his fatigues.

"That's no way to speak of a senior officer, Joker," Lieutenant Commander Pressley interjected, walking forward from navigation. "Come on now you two, smarten up. Take that cap off." Joker rose gingerly from his seat, obligingly pulling the cap off his head and dropping it into the vacated chair. "The Captain wants all hands on deck to welcome the Commander on board."

The last few crewmembers were still scrambling up the stairs from below decks as Shepard stepped through the airlock and onto the ship – mostly new arrivals who weren't used to the _Normandy_'s unusual deckplan. Corporal Jenkins, one of the young marines who'd just arrived yesterday, slid into line to Kaidan's left. "Shepard," he sighed reverently. Kaidan suppressed a groan. All snapped to attention as Anderson and Shepard traded salutes again, the heavy thump of boots coming together reverberating through the air.

"Commander Shepard," Captain Anderson said in his low, gravelly voice, "May I present the crew of the _Normandy_."

Normal protocol called for a quick trip down the line, followed by a short, uninspired speech consisting of a half-dozen poorly integrated platitudes. Most of Kaidan' previous XO's had been interested only in minimizing the time spent with the peons while maximizing the time spent locked onto the captain's ass. All of which suited him just fine – the clammy, prickling sensation creeping through his skin was growing stronger. But in the next moment, rather than striding past them all as quickly as decorum allowed, Shepard pivoted towards the first crew member in line, saluting a shocked Pressley so fast he barely had time to get his own salute up before she began speaking to him. Surprised glances were traded up and down the line, though Kaidan just allowed himself a wry smile – he should've figured Shepard as the type who enjoyed defying convention. Only Anderson seemed unfazed as he moved beside her, one step at a time as she began to make her way down the line, saluting and speaking to each crew member in turn. _Be cool_, Kaidan told himself as she approached his position.

Joker was on Kaidan's immediate right. "Flight Lieutenant Jeff Moreau, chief pilot," he said, snapping into a salute crisper than any other crew member had yet managed. "But I go by the call sign 'Joker'".

She raised an eyebrow. "Joker…your reputation precedes you. I'll have to make sure all my gear is tied down before we leave." Joker chuckled, lowering his arm as Shepard stepped to the right and drilled her eyes on Kaidan.

"L-Lieutenant Kaidan Alenko, Normandy Marine Squadron One," he choked, giving her the most nervous salute he could remember since he'd had three drill instructors yelling so loudly in his face the veins in their necks stood out a full half-inch. Her bright green eyes seemed to bore through his skull as she returned his salute. "I, uh, look forward to serving with you, Commander."

He felt like scalding water was being poured over every part of his body as he waited for her reply. She took a few more seconds than she had with Joker and the others, keeping her gaze locked with his. "The feeling is mutual, Lieutenant," she said smoothly, giving him a small, tight smile before stepping over to speak with a bouncing and grinning Corporal Jenkins.

Kaidan barely remembered the rest of the ceremony. _'I look forward to serving with you Commander.' How lame. An Elkor could've thought of something better. _He was relieved she finally reached the end of the line and Captain Anderson announced a 0800 officer's staff call for the next morning, then dismissed them all, taking Shepard back into the communications room for a briefing.

"That wasn't so bad," Joker said, falling in behind Kaidan as they headed back towards the cockpit. "Well, except for the part where you tripped all over yourself talking to her," he added, easing into his seat. The cap was already back in place.

"If you don't need anything else, I'll be back down at the weapons station," Kaidan snapped. Joker's 'Suit yourself' reply echoed in the background as he stomped towards the aft stairs.

* * *

"This is our destination – Eden Prime." Captain Anderson punched a button on the comm room's holodisplay, and an image of the planet materialized. "After we undock we'll get the engines up to full speed, make a few circuits around the local system, then head for the relay. Travel time to Eden Prime should be about fifteen percent faster than normal. Once we arrive at Eden Prime, we'll practice coming in and out of orbit, dropping the SSV, and finally atmospheric entry and planetside docking. We'll stay on Eden Prime just long enough to evaluate the _Normandy_'s performance, and then we'll be off again. I'll brief you on the next mission when we get to it."

_That's it?_ Kaidan clenched his teeth to keep his expression neutral as the captain continued. _All this crew, a captain with Anderson's record and reputation, Commander f-ing Shepard as our XO, and we're doing nothing more than flying circles around our own home system and a colony?_ Anderson turned away from the ring of seated officers to point out something in the holodisplay, giving Kaidan a chance to gage the others' reactions. Joker was slouched in his chair, regarding the holodisplay with near contempt – he doesn't get it, either. The corners of Pressley's lips were turned down – he's suspicious, too. Dr. Chakwas and the engineering staff seemed unfazed, following the captain's briefing with polite attention.

Seated directly to the right of the captain, Shepard's gaze was fixed on the holodisplay, her eyes scanning back and forth over the readings and information about Eden Prime and their mission. Her face was not blank, instead shifting subtly every few moments from one inscrutable expression into another. If she had any concerns that their mission was rather underwhelming, they were well concealed. _It's going to be hard to figure out where you stand with her_, Kaidan knew. _Pins and needles every time she wants a word_.

The image of Eden Prime dissolved as the captain turned back towards the assembled officers. "This may not seem like much of a mission, but the Alliance and the Citadel Council have put a lot of effort – and a lot of credits – into designing and building this ship," he said, dialing his voice down a note. "They'll be watching very closely to see if – "

"Captain Anderson?" The voice of the first shift's senior noncommissioned officer rang out over the intercom.

The Captain stepped back towards his chair and toggled his comm switch. "Yes, Chief?"

"Priority One message from Alliance Fleet HQ for you, sir. Security authorization required to receive."

"I'll take it in my office, Chief," the captain replied, nodding. "Commander, you take over. This should only take a minute."

"Yes, sir," she said as the captain strode out of the comm room. She picked up a datapad that had been resting unused in her left hand. "Adams," she continued, turning towards the _Normandy_'s chief engineer, "I know we haven't had a chance to see the stealth system in action, but how has it done in the tests?"

Adams cleared his throat nervously. "Ah, just fine, so far. Even though the drive core is 50 larger and puts out 50 more energy than the standard size core for a frigate, the heat wells can contain all the emissions for at least 6 hours of normal operations." Shepard nodded encouragingly, punching a few buttons on her datapad. "We have to wait until we can get out and test it on the move before we'll know how close a thermal sensor has to be to detect us – a mile, half a mile – but so far the system's working as advertised."

"So the _Normandy_ hasn't been out of spacedock at all yet?" she asked, punching a few buttons on her datapad.

"Just one cruise here from the shipyards," Adams replied, "But none of us were on that crew."

Shepard nodded, lifting her eyes from her datapad. "No problems with the drive core itself?" Adams shook his head. She shifted her gaze over to Pressley. "Nav systems have checked out?"

"Every time," he confirmed.

"Weapons?" she asked, tilting her head towards Kaidan.

"Haven't been fired yet," he said, shifting in his seat to face her more directly, "But all the checks and simulations have run without a hitch."

She nodded again. "Good. Life support, environmental, everything else okay?" she added, scanning the rest of the assembled officers.

"There was one small problem that popped up with the food synthesizer system," Joker drawled, "But we figured nobody would notice the difference so we just left it alone."

She allowed herself a slight smile. "Maybe, but I don't think Fleet Command's definition of success for this mission includes the entire crew coming down with the Volus intestinal flu."

"I hear you Commander," Joker replied. "I'll make sure it's fixed."

The doors slid open and Captain Anderson strode back into the room. "I apologize for that, everyone. Commander," he said, coming to a halt just beyond the door, "I have to go to a meeting with the Chief of Naval Operations. There's an all-Fleets staff call at 1100 – the _Normandy_ is going to be represented for the first time. Can you cover?"

"Not a problem, Captain," she said smoothly. "Is there anything else, sir?"

"No. We'll be leaving for Eden Prime at 0600 hours on Saturday. I'm giving everyone twelve hours of shore leave between now and then – Shift A from 1800 hours tonight to 0600 tomorrow, then Shift B from 0600 to 1800 tomorrow. Dismissed." Captain Anderson turned sharply and strode out the doors before anyone else could make it to their feet to salute. The rest of the officers began to filter out, talking lowly amongst themselves.

Kaidan moved slowly, waiting for the crowd to clear so he could make his exit, but stopped at the sight of a frowning Shepard gazing pensively at the floor. Even as he told himself to just leave rather than risk making a fool of himself – again – he heard himself ask, "Something wrong, Commander?"

She gave no sign that she'd heard him for a few seconds, then broke off her contemplation of the deck plating to fix her gaze on the backs of the other officers exiting to the main deck. "No," she said slowly, "Nothing wrong. Just interesting."

"Interesting?" Kaidan nearly pinched himself as the question reverberated around the comm room – _be careful_.

"The CNO doesn't call a captain directly for a meeting, not even one as well-known as Anderson," she said, letting out a long sigh as she reached back to pick up her datapad. "He'd call our Fleet Commander, Admiral Hackett. And even Hackett would probably go through the Group Commander, Anderson's direct report. But the CNO doesn't just call a captain in for a meeting. Not unless it's something big."

Kaidan forced himself to count to three before replying. "This is a pretty important cruise," he started. Shepard frowned again. "But…" Kaidan's mind raced to follow her thoughts. "But this has been planned for months. The CNO wouldn't call about something that's already set."

Her eyes flicked up to assess him momentarily, then returned their focus to the door. "No, he wouldn't. Which means this is something new. Something bigger." Kaidan's body temperature rose several degrees as she turned and walked closer to him. "Have you ever been to a fleet-level staff call, Lieutenant Alenko?" she asked, fixing him in the crosshairs of her gaze once again.

"No ma'am," he replied steadily.

"First time for everything," she said with a sharp nod. "Dig your service dress uniform out of storage and meet me on the docking platform at 1000 hours."

* * *

"Welcome to Alliance Navy Headquarters, Lieutenant" chimed the computer terminal as the entrance gates in front of Kaidan slid open. "Please note that you are not permitted to access Level 5 of this facility. Have a nice day."

He looked to his right to see Shepard stepping through another set of gates, sliding her ID card into a slot in a thin leather datapad portfolio. "An ID check, fingerprint scan and a retinal scan?" he grumbled, glancing past her at the long row of gates through which over a dozens of other military and civilian personnel were passing. "When do we get the cavity search?"

"Careful," she replied lowly, "Don't give the MPs any ideas." Pausing, she looked around the expansive atrium at the various directional signs posted above their heads. "If they haven't moved everybody around since the last time I was here the main conference room should be in the northeast quadrant of Level 2." She snapped her portfolio closed and strode off towards a large staircase in that corner of the atrium.

The salutes began almost immediately as they walked, Shepard a few steps ahead of him, all conversation fading into silence as they passed. Kaidan had known this would happen – by regulation all military personnel, regardless of their rank, were required to salute anyone awarded the Star of Terra, regardless of that person's rank, so her presence was bound to cause a commotion – but the unabashed, wide-eyed stares quickly started making his skin crawl. Some saluted while staring at her namepatch, others at the ribbon bar representing the Star of Terra that lay pinned on its own just above the sizeable array of other medal and commendation ribbons on the left side of her uniform jacket – blue/green/blue with seven small white stars arranged in a chevron. Some of the younger personnel, both military and civilian alike, were too stunned at the sight of the real live Commander Shepard to do anything other than stand frozen with their jaws hanging open. As they neared the top of the stairs he saw some personnel come sprinting out of their offices, no doubt alerted to Shepard's passage by some acquaintance on the lower level. _She's not a float in a parade_, he thought, scowling at the gawkers as much as he dared given that they almost all outranked him. _Or is it less about getting a look at her so much as it's trying to be seen by her?_

"Eyes forward, Lieutenant."

Kaidan's head snapped around towards the sound of her voice. "Ah, yes ma'am. Sorry," he said as they turned a corner and started down a hallway decorated with portraits of previous Alliance Navy CNOs. "I'm not used to being stared at like that, but I guess you are."

Her lips pressed tightly together. "You never get used to it, but if you don't stare back it feels a little less weird. Besides, if you think this is bad just wait until later, when the news has had a chance to spread."

The dark tone that crept into her voice conjured images of thronging crowds waving paper and pen at Shepard as they tried to make their way back out of the building. "Don't these people have anything better to do?" he muttered, settling his gaze on an 'Exit' sign at the far end of the hall.

"Apparently not," she sighed. "They all want to be able to go back and brag to their friends about how different I look in person."

"Well," he said, his eyes shifting unbidden to look at her, "Not all that different from –" Her head turned just far enough to give him a _don't-go-there_ glare. "Sorry ma'am," he added sharply as she looked back towards the end of the hall, quickening her step. "Eyes forward."

_She doesn't look all that different from the vids, though_, he thought, unable to keep himself from risking the occasional glance at her face and figure now that the question was planted in his mind. Her hair was the medium-dark brown it seemed to be on the news, but when they passed beneath the hall lights he saw a shimmering, warm red undertone that had never come through in pictures. Same hairdo she always had, but the regulations on personal grooming were so specific there were only about a half-dozen different hairstyles any woman in the service could wear. Most settled on one they liked and stuck with it for their entire career. Her skin was very pale, but it was a genuine fairness, not the ashy pallor so many developed after being on maneuvers for months. Combined and contrasted with her dark hair, the dark blue of their uniforms, and those seizingly bright green eyes, she was…Kaidan's thoughts faltered, unable to think of any single word.

A thinning crowd revealed a set of sliding doors, emblazoned with the insignia of the Alliance Navy, just to the left of where the hall came to an end. They moved through them as quickly as they could without breaking into a run, entering the largest conference room Kaidan had ever seen. A u-shaped table long enough to seat at least two hundred dominated the space, with dozens of extra chairs lining the walls and scores of holoprojectors mounted above for remote participants. Small groups of captains and admirals stood talking together throughout the room. They paused to salute Shepard but did not seem surprised by her presence, returning to their conversations as soon as she passed by. Near the left end of the table Kaidan spotted the shiniest, newest plaque in the room resting on the polished metal surface: SR-1 SAV NORMANDY. Two chairs flanked the plaque – Shepard dropped down into the one closer to the head of the table, letting out a long breath as she finally relaxed. "Made it," she breathed.

"There's more people here than I expected," Kaidan said, craning his neck to count the other plaques on the table as he took the seat to her right.

"Every ship in the local system or the cluster sends at least one representative," Shepard replied, sweeping her gaze over the other attendees. "Usually more – one senior officer to do the talking and a junior officer or two to observe and get some face time with the brass. Ships on maneuvers call in using the holoprojectors. Add in the Fleet and Group command staffs and you've got quite the party. They only do this once a month, and it's often more to see and be seen than to actually discuss anything worthwhile." She leaned closer to him, her eyes still surveying the room. "Pay attention to what isn't said just as much as what is," she said in a low voice. "Note the difference between those who have something to say and those who say something just so they can say they said something. And watch for the alliances, the rivalries; captains and admirals who started hating each other their first week at the Academy and are still acting it out thirty years later." Shifting back away from him, she opened her portfolio and began powering up her datapad. "You don't have to play in the politics of headquarters to survive here, Lieutenant, but you sure as hell better know what everybody else's game is."

Kaidan laughed gently. "Duly noted, ma'am, though I don't think I'm going to need to worry about that anytime soon."

"No?" she replied, arching an eyebrow in his direction. "You've been serving on one ship or another continually for what, about three years now?" Kaidan nodded. "Since you're only a couple of months away from making O-4 –"

"If I make O-4," he sighed under his breath. Any idiot with a pulse could get promoted through to Lieutenant, but crossing the line over to Lieutenant Commander was the first big cut any officer who wanted to make a career out of service in the Alliance had to pass. The review boards gave you three shots – anyone who failed all three times would be required to retire.

Shepard gave him a small, almost reassuring smile. "You will. You never would've been put on this crew if you weren't," she said simply. "And when you do, you're more than due for a couple of years of shore duty – probably as a deputy XO on some admiral's staff. Those battles are fought with words, not guns. The earlier you start learning those rules of engagement, the better."

"You give all your junior officers this pep talk?" Kaidan muttered.

"No," she replied sharply. "Only the ones who seem like they'll put it to good use." She started punching buttons on her datapad with a bit more force than necessary. "Besides, I need to remind myself what a snake pit this place is just to make sure I don't screw up."

Kaidan let out a disbelieving laugh. "I'm sure you don't have anything to worry about, Commander."

Shepard's reply came a few seconds late, her voice dangerously smooth. "Why would you think that, Lieutenant?" she asked calmly, turning her head until she could fix him with a dark glare.

"Um," Kaidan floundered, withering. "You're….well, you're you, ma'am."

"Anyone under my command who doesn't knock off the hero-worshipping crap will quickly find themselves under someone else's command," she growled, her voice low and tense. "I get enough shining-example-on-a-pedestal bull from the brass – I expect my crew to have a much firmer grasp on reality. Understood, Lieutenant?"

The hard edge in her tone and the set of her eyes sent an icy shiver down Kaidan's spine. "Yes ma'am," he said calmly.

She kept her eyes locked on his for a few extra heartbeats, then gave him a short nod, her expression softening a fraction. "I brought you here, Alenko, rather than any other officer on the ship because your service history and the few observations I've made on my own tell me that you're the most likely candidate to be sitting in this chair ten years from now. Don't give me a reason to change my mind."

"Y-yes, ma'am," Kaidan stammered, momentarily unable to concentrate on much more than the feeling of being yanked out of a deep freezer and dropped into a pot of boiling water. She shook her head slightly, turning back to her datapad. He was about to choke out a 'thank you' when an admiral stepped up to the podium at the head of the table, silencing the chattering crowd with a wave of his hand.

"Good morning ladies and gentlemen, let's get started," the admiral said, pushing a button on the podium. The wall behind him lit up, displaying the Alliance Navy logo. The table in front of Kaidan also lit up – a viewscreen lay hidden beneath the dark, glassy surface of the table. "We don't have too many things to discuss today," the admiral continued, as the logo vanished from the wall and the viewscreen, replaced by a to-the-minute agenda for the meeting, "But there are some budget issues being debated in Parliament right now that you need to be aware of. First, Admiral Cohen will brief the administrative updates."

The first admiral stepped back as a second admiral got up from the table and advanced to the podium. "Good morning. As an initial matter, the Flag Officer Promotion Board will be meeting at the end of next month. Please be sure to submit your evaluations of the captains under your command by COB on the 31st so the Board will have them during their deliberations." He cleared his throat and looked down at his datapad. "Admiral Zhukovna has been assigned to command the 20th Recon Wing of the Fourth Fleet. Admiral Zamarippa has been assigned as Deputy Commander, Alliance Navy Garrison Management Command. Admiral Matagi has been assigned as Commander, Alliance Navy Medical Command." Each admiral, or the holographic image of that admiral, raised a hand and acknowledged the congratulatory nods of their colleagues as their name was read. "We have two new ships commissioned into service in the last month – the cruiser _Tamerlane_, under Captain Reyes-Ayala, and the frigate _Normandy_, under Captain Anderson."

A rumble of murmurs rolled through the room at the mention of the _Normandy_. "Excuse me, Zev," called out an admiral on the other side of the table from Shepard and Kaidan, raising his hand with a casual lethargy, "But I don't see Captain Anderson here."

Kaidan felt rather than saw Shepard stiffen. "Commander Shepard, XO of the _Normandy_," she said in a voice that was nonetheless even and relaxed. "Captain Anderson was called into another meeting. Lieutenant Alenko and I are attending in his absence."

The echo of the sound of his name momentarily drowned out the renewed mumblings amongst the admirals. Kaidan's hearing kicked back in just in time to hear a not-so-_sotto-voce_ muttering from a captain seated on his right, "A meeting?" He half-thought to reply, but Admiral Cohen spoke up before anyone else could get a word in. "Yes," he said smoothly, "The CNO got caught up in that meeting too. He sends his regrets to everyone here." The murmurings ebbed as the admiral cleared his throat and clicked the viewscreen to another slide, one filled with numbers and acronyms. "Admiral Mbenge will now go over the latest budget proposals for Fiscal year 2185 being discussed in the naval affairs subcommittee of the defense oversight committee in the lower house of the Alliance Parliament." A bald, deeply dark-skinned admiral rose from the table and strode to the platform. Kaidan was almost immediately lost in the jumble of figures the admiral rattled off, quickly going through slide after slide of spreadsheets and charts. 125,340,800 credits for the network and communications command…388,793,000 credits for the construction of an expanded garrison near the second-largest city on Terra Nova, to be split somehow between the corps of engineers, the personnel command, and three different subcommands within the material command …_maybe I don't want to get promoted after all_, he sighed, wishing he'd spent more time paying attention in his statistics class at the Academy. Shepard, on the other hand, was moving her stylus across the surface of her datapad with such speed and force it was a wonder the screen didn't crack.

"Overall," the admiral said, clicking to a slide filled with sums and trend lines, "Our operational budget will grow by about two percent, which is less than the five percent increase we had requested. This is mostly due to the committee's decision not to program for the construction of new capital ships before the FY 2186 budget cycle begins."

The admiral who had spoken up before let out a sudden cough. "Maybe if we hadn't blown two years' worth of construction funds on that Turian boondoggle the committee would trust us to spend the taxpayer's money more wisely," he grumbled, softly enough to pretend he wasn't trying to interrupt.

"Mackenzie, that 'boondoggle' has moved us over a generation ahead in navigation and stealth technologies," a silver-haired admiral near the head of the table replied with the lethargic annoyance of someone used to refuting the same criticisms time and time again. "And it's demonstrated our willingness to work with the Turians and other Council races on joint defense projects."

Admiral Mackenzie let out a short, derisive laugh. "Harry, I need new carriers – the _Alesia_ is nearly twenty years old." He cast a baleful glance over at Shepard. "If Parliament wants to waste millions of credits doing nothing more than blowing kisses at the Citadel Council, let them do it out of the diplomatic budget."

Shepard leaned forward until she was nearly to the edge of her seat. "With all due respect, Admiral," she replied calmly, "The _Normandy_'s stealth systems give us unparalleled infiltration capability – even more than the Salarians have – with the ability to deliver more concentrated firepower than any other ship its size."

"Lipstick on a pig, Commander," Mackenzie retorted.

"Maybe," Shepard shot back, a tinge of red creeping into her cheeks. "But your entire fleet couldn't spot that pig even if it was just a kilometer away and every sensor on every ship was looking in exactly the right place."

Kaidan choked back a laugh as Mackenzie flushed, leaning across the table and pointing a finger in Shepard's direction. "You think – "

"Fascinating as this discussion of pork products might turn out to be," the presiding admiral cut in, raising a hand to ward off any protests from Admiral Mackenzie, "We have many other items to discuss before adjourning, so let's move on, shall we?" Mackenzie leaned back in his chair, scowling at Shepard, who had suddenly developed an intense interest in the pie chart displayed on the main viewscreen.

Kaidan counted to ten before leaning over towards Shepard. "What's his deal?" he whispered.

"Mackenzie?" she whispered back, turning her head only a fraction from her study of the charts. "I'll tell you later."

The rest of the meeting ran by quickly – a few admirals came close to debating the wisdom of a proposal to expand the Fifth Fleet to a fourth group, more than any other fleet except the First – but no one seemed to have the stomach for anything more than wrapping things up and getting to lunch. The presiding admiral had barely finished thanking everyone for attending before Shepard had her datapad sliding back into a pocket in her portfolio, casting an apprehensive glance in Admiral Mackenzie's direction before sliding her seat back and standing up. "Let's get out of here," she said to Kaidan in a low voice, turning towards the doors to the hall. Kaidan could see Mackenzie hurrying around the corner, rushing towards them

"Elizabeth!" A middle-aged female admiral emerged from the crowd, her arms spread wide as she approached. Shepard's tense expression melted into a genuine smile, embracing the admiral. Mackenzie stopped short, scowling first at Shepard and then at Kaidan, before shaking his head and stomping away.

The admiral stepped back from Shepard, watching Mackenzie go with a frown. "You would think he would be over that by now," she muttered.

"No," Shepard sighed sadly, "Actually, I wouldn't." She stepped to the side, waving Kaidan closer. "May I introduce Lieutenant Kaidan Alenko, my squad commander on the _Normandy_," she said, her voice returning to its normal strength as he saluted the admiral.

"Admiral Genvieve Dumont," she replied in a melodic, French-accented voice, returning his salute.

"Genvieve was my first CO," Shepard added, pronouncing the name in the same fashion as the Admiral, "Right out of basic –"

"I can't talk, Elizabeth," the Admiral interjected, glancing around nervously. "I have another meeting in ten minutes. But I couldn't let you leave without at least saying hello." Disappointment flashed briefly across Shepard's face. "It is good to see you," Genvieve finished, quickly saluting Shepard before rushing off in the direction of the main corridor.

Shepard sighed, turning back towards Kaidan. "She made Admiral last year," she muttered darkly. "They haven't given her the requisite lobotomy yet, but it's only a matter of time. I –" Her name rang out from another corner of the room. They turned to see yet another admiral advancing towards them, an insincere and overly friendly grin plastered on his lips. "I'll handle this one, Lieutenant," she told Kaidan, stepping away. "Meet me out in the hall." He didn't even have a chance to reply or salute her before the second Admiral came crashing in, greeting her loudly. The polite, frozen smile Kaidan saw on Shepard's face kindled an impulse to follow, to give her a diversion or at least an ally –

"Kaidan!" A hand gripped his shoulder and spun him around, away from Shepard and into a broad, ruddy face. "What are you doing here?"

It took Kaidan a few seconds to put the name to the face in front of him. "Tomas, good to see you," he said quickly as soon as the memory clicked into place. "Are you, ah" – he glanced back over his shoulder – Shepard and the admiral were gone – "Are you working here?"

"Nah – I'm on an Explorer ship, the _Hudson_, with the Second Fleet. We're in spacedock so the CO brought a bunch of us down here to see the show," Tomas gushed. "But what about you – what are you doing here? I thought you were out with the Third Fleet in the Verge."

"I was," Kaidan said, trying to look around to see where Shepard had gone. "But I got transferred just two weeks ago. I'm with the Fifth now – the _Normandy_." Seeing neither the Commander nor a telltale gathering of excited onlookers, Kaidan waved his friend towards the doors.

Tomas followed, his smile fading noticeably. "Yeah, I heard what Commander Shepard said. Didn't she just report to that ship?"

"Yesterday." The main corridor came into sight, choked with uniforms.

"Well, good luck with that," Tomas snorted. "I'm sure it's a great ship, but if she stays you'll want to get off quick."

Kaidan suppressed a confused frown, distracting himself with scanning the crowd of officers on either side. "What do you mean?"

"I was in one of her squads for a while, a couple of years ago. Frigid bitch." The confusion on Kaidan's face became evident, so Tomas stopped and dropped his voice into a low whisper. "Nothing but business, orders this and the mission that. Doesn't have any fun, doesn't go out with the other officers, doesn't even laugh when you try to crack one little joke in a squad meeting. I'm telling you –"

"Lieutenant? Are we ready?"

Tomas jumped back as if a thresher maw had just sprung from the deck. "C-C-Commander," he stammered, saluting.

"Lieutenant Mathieson," she replied calmly, her salute short and curt. "Lieutenant Alenko goes on shore leave at 1800 if you want to talk to him some more. Otherwise we need to get back to our ship."

"Understood, ma'am," Tomas said, giving Kaidan an _I-told-you-so_ look. "Meet you at 1900 at the O Club, Kaidan?" Alenko nodded silently, deciding for the time being that the best path to take was none at all. Tomas nodded, then gave Shepard another salute before turning sharply and striding away.

Shepard watched him leave, her eyes narrowing slightly. "Friend of yours, Alenko?" she asked evenly.

"From the Academy, ma'am," Kaidan said cautiously. "I haven't seen him in a couple of years."

"Just remember you're due back on the _Normandy_ at 0600 tomorrow," she said, relaxing her expression and her tone as Tomas vanished from view. "We're on such a short schedule if you get into any trouble you might get left behind."

"Yes, ma'am." Confusion crept back into Kaidan's mind, though he kept it off his face this time. "You won't have any problems with me."

Her voice softened further as she turned back to look at him. "No, you don't strike me as that type," she said. "Let's get going –"

It was Shepard's turn to be seized, a hand gripping her elbow and steering her towards the fringes of the crowd. "I can't say much," Admiral Dumont whispered, "But you need to hear what I can say." She pulled Shepard swiftly around a corner into a small alcove by a stairwell, raising an arm to block Kaidan from following.

"He's on my crew," Shepard said quickly, reaching under the admiral's arm to pull Kaidan into the alcove. "Anything you have to say to me is going to affect him too," she told Genvieve. Kaidan clenched his jaw to keep his expression blank, his arm tingling from Shepard's touch.

The admiral hesitated, but did not protest. "The meeting your captain is in, with the CNO?" Shepard stepped back, frowning. "He went with the CNO to a meeting with the other Joint Chiefs," Genvieve continued, "And the Minister of Defense, and several members of the Alliance Parliament."

Shepard's frown deepened into a suspicious scowl. "What in the hell do they want with Anderson?"

"I don't know what exactly the meeting is about," Genvieve cautioned, looking quickly over her shoulders to make sure no one else was near. "But there was one other who was seen going into the CNO's office. A Turian."

"What?!" Kaidan exclaimed.

The commander's expression did not waver. "What about this Turian?"

"There is a captain on my staff whose last tour was with our military attaché office in our embassy on the Citadel," the admiral said, her voice shaking nervously. "He says he recognized this Turian – Nihlus, he called him. He says –" she glanced around again, biting her lip – "He says the Turian is a Spectre."

"A Spectre?" Shepard's gaze sharpened. "Genvieve – "

"I don't know anything else," the admiral said quickly. "Not for certain. I have to go." She stepped back so fast she nearly tripped, steadying herself only when Shepard reached out and held her arm. The two women's gazes met. "Your transfer from Admiral Chang's office to the _Normandy _was very sudden, no?" the admiral whispered, holding Shepard's gaze a moment longer before twisting her arm away and hurrying around the corner and out of sight.

Shepard and Kaidan stood silently in the alcove for a long minute after the admiral's departure – the commander lost in thought, and Kaidan too bewildered by everything he'd heard and seen the last few hours to make sense of any of it. Finally, when it seemed Shepard wasn't planning on moving unless prodded at gunpoint, she blinked. "Let's go, Lieutenant," she snapped, taking a few steps to pass him and head into the main corridor before stopping close to him and turning so that her face was just inches from his. "I trust it goes without saying that none of what you just heard is to be repeated to anyone?"

"Yes, ma'am." He nodded crisply, willing himself to look calm and confident. "Can I ask, ma'am…" A look of warning passed over her face, but Kaidan pressed on. "Two weeks ago, when most of us reported to the _Normandy_, we were told the XO was still out on maneuvers and would be reporting late, though they didn't say exactly when." He met Shepard's eyes, holding steady until the hard set of her jaw relaxed. "Since you came from a staff office I'm guessing they weren't talking about you."

"Apparently not," she said, rocking back on her heels, "Considering I was ordered to the _Normandy_ less than 72 hours ago."

Kaidan let out a low whistle. "That is fast."

"Normally such a rapid exit from a staff office is a sign that you've displeased your CO, but Admiral Chang was reveling in the attention he got from having me in his office. Couldn't complain about my work, either, if he'd bothered to pay attention to that," Shepard said darkly. "Nothing about this assignment has been normal so far, and I've got a feeling that's not changing anytime soon."

"Nothing?"

"Oh come on, Alenko," Shepard snorted, "You're too smart not to have noticed."

Kaidan gulped. "Well…we are overstaffed for a shakedown cruise," he said warily. "And the mission…I don't know, Commander. It just doesn't feel right."

"No, it doesn't," she said, shaking her head. "And not only are we overstaffed, but most of the command staff is overqualified for this kind of assignment – not just Anderson and I, but Pressley, Adams, Joker, you – none of us should be here." Kaidan nodded silently – there had been a lot of speculation in the junior officers' quarters when Anderson reported as to why someone with his experience was given this command. They'd given up after a few days, marking it down to the mysterious and impenetrable logic of Fleet Command. "I don't get it," Shepard sighed, leaning against the wall.

"Well, this is a high-profile mission," Kaidan ventured. "It's all over the vids because of the Citadel funding and Turian design. The PAO has been swamped with media requests to interview anyone on the crew, from the captain to the second-shift mechanic." Every request was refused, and Anderson had made it quite clear that anybody who talked to the press on the side would be court-martialed for endangering operational security. "Maybe the brass wanted a more experienced crew to make sure nothing goes wrong."

Shepard shrugged. "That's what I told myself at first. Their butts are on the firing line too if we screw up. Now," she sighed, glancing in the direction that the admiral had gone, "I'm not so sure." She stared pensively at the doors to the conference room for a few moments, then straightened up and turned back to face Kaidan. "At any rate, Lieutenant, whatever concerns we have should be kept to ourselves. If there is some hidden agenda or mission behind all of this it doesn't have a chance of succeeding if we let ourselves be distracted from accomplishing the mission at hand."

"Aye aye, ma'am," he replied, snapping off a quick salute.

She nodded crisply in acknowledgement, then stepped out of the alcove and back into the main hallway. Gazing down the length of the hall, she frowned as the several dozen soldiers and civilians still lingering all seemed to turn her way at the same time. "This is probably the best we can hope for," she muttered under her breath. "Let's get back to the ship."

* * *

Captain Anderson didn't return to the _Normandy_ until late in the afternoon, just as the last diagnostics checks were coming back as clean as they always had. He slowed down just long enough to greet Shepard and be assured everything was running smoothly, then disappeared into his office. Kaidan, manning the weapons panel near Anderson's office, watched out of the corner of his eye as Shepard attempted to ask Anderson about his meeting, only to receive an unconvincing "Nothing to worry about," from the captain as his door slid closed behind him. She stood staring at the door, her eyes narrowing into something near a glare, then flicked her gaze over to Alenko too quickly for him to try to pretend he hadn't been watching. He felt a slight blush color his cheeks as their eyes met, shrugging his shoulders with a nothing-we-can-do-about-it-now air of resignation. The blush spread when she let out a short laugh, giving him a bemused smile. "Going ashore soon, Lieutenant?" she asked, taking a step in his direction.

"Yes, ma'am," he replied, hoping the orange glow from the control panels masked the color in his face. "Just finishing up here. Then I'll change and head out."

She nodded, the smile fading into her normal, attentive expression. "Have a good time. Just make sure you're back and fit for duty at 0600 hours."

"Will do, ma'am." Shepard turned to leave. "Uh," he continued quickly, "You have any plans, ma'am?"

"Not really," she said, stopping long enough to glance back at him. "I might just stay here and watch some vids. Have a good evening, Lieutenant." She turned away and headed back towards the stairs to the command deck. He watched her until she vanished behind the loading bay elevator, and didn't turn back to his station until he could no longer hear the echo of her boots on the stairs.

Tomas was already at the O Club by the time Kaidan arrived, casually dressed in an old pair of fatigue pants and a rather tight-fitting dark shirt. Seeing Kaidan's uncertain glance down at his khakis, Tomas laughed. "I should've mentioned I wasn't planning on staying here long," he said. "Untuck your shirt and you'll be fine."

They ate quickly in the lounge before heading to the shuttle station that would take them off-post, chatting casually about the latest news on some of their other classmates from the Academy. The shuttle quickly filled with personnel from the many ships in spacedock, including Jenkins and some of the younger marines from the _Normandy_, some dressed comfortably for a relaxing night out with friends, others more carefully attired for a date or an evening at a club. A flash of reddish-brown hair froze the air in Kaidan's lungs – _Shepard?_ – but as soon as the crowd parted he saw the hair was cut too short to be the hers. _Not that she'd be caught dead in that flimsy top or don't-bend-over skirt at any rate – she'd be more of a pants-and-boots type._ Tomas' elbow digging into his ribs broke the reverie he hadn't known he was in – the shuttle had arrived at the main stop for the entertainment sector, and he was holding up the crowd behind him. Muttering a quick apology to no one and everyone, Kaidan hurried off the shuttle and into the station.

The lower sector of the Arcturus Station had gradually been given over to restaurants, bars and clubs in the years since it was first built, as the proliferation of secure satellite stations allowed more areas of the central structure to be moved outside the fence. Nicer, more expensive establishments lined the corridors closest to the shuttle stop – admirals didn't like to have to walk very far to get to their three-martini lunches and dry-aged porterhouse dinners. Chain restaurants and shops crowded the middle levels. Faux-Irish pubs and dance clubs carefully designed to look casual completed the look of prefabricated corporate cheerfulness. The lower levels hosted clubs with at least one fight or raid every night and other anonymous, illicit enterprises that always flourished where there were lots of young marines with too much combat pay looking for too much fun.

It was into these lowest levels that Tomas headed, striding past the brightly lit display windows and perpetual 'Sale!' signs of the middle levels without even turning his head. Kaidan had only ventured into 'the Heel' once before during his first tour on the Station, mostly so when his father asked expectantly if he'd gone he could truthfully answer that he had. He'd gotten off the elevator, walked down the left side of the corridor, turned around at the sight of a fistfight about halfway down, then walked back up the right side until he got back to the elevator and headed up to the familiar and boring but clean and safe middle levels, passing the rest of the evening nursing a beer in the far corner of a sports bar as the Inter-Alliance Basketball League championships lit up the vid screens. "Are you sure about going down here?" he asked Tomas as they stepped into the elevator.

"Oh, absolutely," his friend replied, grinning. "The girls down here are a lot more fun – not the pay-for-play girls," he amended, seeing Kaidan's face darken. "But you'll never go back to the boring little teases in the middle clubs, my friend." Tomas grinned even more broadly, bouncing on his heels as the elevator slowed and stopped. "Trust me."

The lights and the noise assailed Kaidan's senses as soon as the elevator door began sliding open – loud, thumping dance music that made his teeth rattle in his jaw. Neon signs glowed harshly from the entrances of the clubs and bars, punctuated by the eye-popping flashes of strobe lights inside. The crowds gathered out in the corridor seemed orderly enough standing in line to get into a club or clustering around a makeshift patio bar or takeaway window. That would begin to change in two or three hours, he knew, warily eyeing the hardened faces and scarred fists below some of the regulation buzz-cuts that littered the crowds.

They hadn't gone more than one or two corridors in when Tomas abruptly stopped, pulling Kaidan in next to him at the end of one of the longest lines on that level. Kaidan craned his neck up to see what, exactly, they were queuing for, but the only working lights in the sign above the entrance were an 'r', 'is', and a 'y' at the end, though a neon guitar did shine brightly in front of a darkened upper-level window. "What is this place?" he whispered to Tomas.

"A club – Paradise City," his friend replied. "Mostly late 20th and early 21st century rock music. Live bands."

The name tugged in the back of Kaidan's mind. "Isn't that the place where those two marines got stabbed to death a few years back?"

Tomas shrugged, chuckling. "Yeah, used to be you didn't dare go in here if you didn't have at least half a dozen combat action medals. But that was then – the wrongful death lawsuits wiped the old owners out. New ones came in and cleaned the place up a little bit." The line moved forward a few steps. "They're nearly respectable enough these days to move up to the middle levels, but they'd pay three times the rent for this space up there." A few more steps brought them into the dim red glow of the few lights that were lit.

"Officers don't get slugged on sight anymore, huh?" Kaidan asked, still a little nervous – a quick once-over of the rest of the line confirmed his suspicion that he was noticeably overdressed.

"Don't start anything, won't be anything," Tomas replied, nodding. "Just make sure you keep a hand on your wallet – the pickpockets down here are first-rate." They advanced another several feet, finally catching sight of the pair of tall, burly bouncers working the entrance. One held a portable ID scanner while the other kept his eyes on the crowd, and both had large, military-issue pistols slung across their hips. They waived a tight cluster of four whispering girls into the club, bringing Kaidan and Tomas to the front of the line.

The bouncer with the scanner gave them a quick once-over, his eyes darting to the usual places a weapon could be concealed. "ID?" he grunted. Tomas already had his card out, handing it over calmly while Kaidan dug in his pockets for his. The bouncer finished with Tomas, waving him on, then let out a soft, exasperated sigh as Kaidan continued to search. He finally felt the smooth, cool surface of the card brush his fingers, quickly seizing it and pulling it out to hand to the bouncer. The bouncer scanned the card – looked at Kaidan – then looked at the readout on his scanner a second time. "_Normandy_, huh?" he said quietly.

"Uh, yeah," Kaidan said slowly.

"You'll never have a better commander than Shepard even if you spend the rest of your life in the marines," the bouncer replied, handing the ID card back to Kaidan with what almost seemed to be a wistful smile. "Tell her Chief Lukovic says hi."

Kaidan grasped his ID card and gave the bouncer a short nod. "I will. Thanks." He turned and followed Tomas through the dark entryway into the club.

He hadn't gone more than a few steps when he was brought up short by the sight of another bouncer, arms crossed, standing next to a slight, pale young woman wearing clothes so dark he couldn't see where they ended and the walls began. "20 credits, soldier," she barked, thrusting a portable credit charger at his face.

"For what?" he exclaimed, stepping back quickly to avoid a bloody nose.

"Cover charge," she sighed, rolling her eyes. "There's one every night we have a live band."

He shrugged, handing over his ID card. Just past the woman's shoulders Kaidan began to make out the outlines of the club's interior. A bar ran the along the wall on his left, its rail crowded with men and women leaning over trying to get a bartender's attention by tapping their cards on the bartop. Some small tables and chairs were scattered in front, serving as drink rests for the large groups who stood around talking while a lone waitress struggled to get through without dropping the fully loaded tray she carried. On the right he saw a small, dark hall lit by an 'Exit' and 'Restrooms' sign. A large, open dance floor occupied the entire center of the club, though he couldn't see the floor through the shoulder-to-shoulder crowd that was pressed into the space, all facing towards a stage that ran the length of the back wall. Two dark-clothed men were moving about on the stage, setting up microphone stands and taping down wires. The woman flicked his card through her fingers, stopping just as a corner zipped past his chin – he took it from her with a muttered "Thanks," then stepped quickly through the hall and into the softly lit bar area.

His eyes were just starting to adjust to the light and look for Tomas when the entire club was suddenly plunged into near total darkness. Screams erupted from the throng on the dance floor – Kaidan instinctively reached for where his pistol would be, but relaxed as his mind realized the noise was excited rather than panicked. A single light began to shine, reaching from the ceiling and gradually illuminating the left side of the stage where a lone guitarist now stood. Clad in well-worn combat boots, loose-fitting fatigue pants, and an even looser black t-shirt draped over a long-sleeved white undershirt, the guitarist's face was obscured behind long waves of waist-length black hair. As the screams and cheers swelled the guitarist gave a small wave to the crowd.

With a flick of the wrist shrieking, ear-rattling notes began tumbling out of the guitar. The guitarist began to tap a foot in time as a second spotlight began to shine on the other side of the stage, revealing a young, Asian-featured man holding a microphone. He also wore well-scuffed combat boots and fatigue pants but sported only an unfastened 20th century-style ammunition vest above, exposing several tattoos on his chest as he started bouncing to the beat of the guitarist's line. The audience began to clap in time, more joining with each note while the guitarist cycled through the line a second time before the singer raised the microphone to his mouth and began to sing.

The words ran by too fast for Kaidan to pick them out of the muddied echo that reached the back of the club, but the entire audience was shouting along with the singer by the end of the second line. The house lights began to come up slowly, revealing a drumset in the center of the stage and the rest of the band scattered around; a dark-skinned man to the right of the guitarist in a tight-fitting Alliance Marine logo t-shirt, strumming a low-slug bass guitar; a blonde woman standing behind a keyboard at the back left of the stage, shaking a half-tambourine; and a second guitarist in the shadows to the other side of the drums. The singer stepped towards the apron of the stage and the outstretched hands of the fans on the floor, ratcheting up the audience's frenzy as they began to jump, arms and shoulders waving in time like roiling waves in a storm, singing along so loud as to nearly drown out the sound of the band.

"Kaidan! There you are!" Tomas stumbled into Kaidan, spilling a few drops of some dark liquid out of the drink he was holding with one hand. His other hand was wrapped around the arm of a petite blonde woman who he now pulled forward until she was right in front of Kaidan. "This is Ellie," Tomas said, already slurring his words. "And this," he continued, waving his drink at a second, taller, blonde trailing behind the first, "Is her friend Katie." Kaidan nodded politely at both women. "So, whatchya drinkin', Alenko?" Tomas rambled on, dropping his hand onto Ellie's back. "They've got a full bar here, lots of special drinks – look out for this Snake Venom stuff, though." He shook the glass in his hand back and forth, shaking his head. "They're not kidding when they say it gets you with the first bite."

"I'll just get myself a beer, thanks," Kaidan said, accepting his usual relegation to the role of wingman with a smile.

"Excellent – waitress!" Two waitresses were standing near the fringe of the bar area carrying trays of already-filled drinks for the patrons to buy – one filled with small plastic cups of mixed shots, the other with taller cups filled with beer. "A house brew for my friend here!" Kaidan reached over to take the cup from her, handing his card to her with his other hand. "So," Tomas continued as the waitress scanned Kaidan's card and handed it back to him before moving on to another part of the bar, "You ladies on shore leave, or are you stationed here?"

"Neither," the shorter one replied, stepping a bit to the side to let her friend into the conversation. "We're civilian employees here – I do force planning for the personnel command, and Katie's in contracting and procurement." Tomas grinned, leaning down to whisper in her ear.

Her friend shook her head as Ellie giggled and blushed in response, turning to Kaidan with a sympathetic smile – clearly she was as used to playing wingwoman to her friend as Kaidan was to being the perennial wingman amongst his. "So," she said, sipping the small, red-colored drink she carried, "Who are you guys with?"

"Ah, Tomas is with an Explorer ship that's here in spacedock for a few days," he answered. "And I –" A deafening crash of guitars and a high-pitched scream from the singer flooded his ears – "I just transferred here from Third Fleet."

"Come on, Kaidan, don't be shy," Tomas interjected, turning his attention from Ellie's neck just long enough to gesture at a nearby waitress for another drink. "He's on the _Normandy_!"

Katie's eyes widened. "The _Normandy_? They were talking about that ship for a long time on the news tonight – is it true Commander Shepard just joined that crew?"

"It is," Tomas said. "Which is why my friend here needs to have a good time tonight, because as soon as he's back on his ship it'll all be over."

"You're the one on the ship that goes out for months at a time," Kaidan countered, working hard to keep his expression even – something in the tone of Tomas' voice whenever he mentioned Shepard was sending a strange twitch through Kaidan's nerves.

"Anyhow," Katie chirped, "Where are you guys from – originally?"

"Stockholm," Tomas replied, trading his empty glass for the full one a waitress had brought him. "And Kaidan's from somewhere in Canada – Toronto, right?"

"Vancouver, actually," he said, forcing a polite smile onto his face.

Ellie seized Tomas' drink and took a large sip. "We're both from Buenos Aires – even went to the same secondary school – but we hadn't seen each other in years until we met up again here!" Tomas reached to take his drink back, igniting a fit of keep-away that ended with a large slosh of the dark liquid onto the light-colored, low-cut tank Ellie was wearing. Katie whipped a clutch of napkins out of the small purse she carried and both women began a mop-up operation as Tomas went in search of replacement drinks.

Kaidan sighed, turning his attention away from the ladies. There wasn't anything wrong with them; he just wasn't in to it tonight. He could predict the ending to the evening, the same as it had been dozens of times before with Tomas and other friends through the years – his friend and girl number 1 would eventually leave together, Kaidan would politely decline any serious advances from girl number 2 but would ensure she made it back to the shuttle safely, then head back to his quarters alone. He didn't mind – he rather wanted it that way, wanted to stay in the background, stay in control. Even so, he used to be able to at least enjoy himself sometimes – now all he really wanted was to finish his beer and get back to the _Normandy_ for a few hours sleep. _Maybe I've gotten too old for this_, he wondered, taking a large gulp of his beer. _Or maybe I'm just tired of pretending to like immature blowhards like Tomas just because we used to nod at each other in the halls at the Academy_. The image of the officer's lounge on the _Normandy_ danced teasingly before his eyes, quiet and uncrowded – maybe Shepard would be there, watching a vid with her feet up on the coffee table. The memory of that smile she'd given him outside Anderson's office floated through his mind, filling him with far more of a warm, dizzying head rush than the beer.

He barely heard the ladies excuse themselves to the restroom, nodding absently in response as his gaze drifted back over towards the band. They'd cycled through several songs, each as loud as the other as the crowd continued to jump and sing along. Kaidan could feel the glass in his hand vibrating with every downbeat. The singer had stayed near the front of the stage, the microphone in his hand – a real vintage 20th century piece – his vest flopping open with every gesture he made, revealing his many tatoos. Most were indiscernible at a distance but Kaidan immediately recognized some Alliance Navy crests. The red flames on a black background were the symbol of the carrier _Valhalla_, and the black horse's head on a green background was from the battle cruiser _Attila_ – Kaidan himself had an old sleeve patch featuring a black horse's head facing the opposite way on a red background from her sister ship, the _Genghis_. Any ink visible when wearing fatigues was against regs, but hidden ones like those were fine even for active duty marines. The singer's hair was buzz cut, as was the bassist's – all six band members were in fatigue pants and old combat boots, so they'd probably all been active duty at one time, and some likely still were. _Must be why they keep singing about violence and death_, Kaidan figured, draining the rest of his beer as the singer screamed some line about scars. Marines tended not to sing about sweethearts and springtime.

"I see my timing is perfect!" Tomas crowed, snatching the empty glass out of Kaidan's hand and replacing it with a full one. "Where'd the girls go?"

"Bathroom," Kaidan replied, stifling a sigh at the sight of the new beer. "Uh, thanks," he said, hoping he could finish this and make a gracious exit before too long.

Tomas draped his arm around Kaidan's shoulders. "So, whaddya think?" he asked, trying to lean down to whisper in Kaidan's ear but forced by the noise from the band and the crowd to keep his voice near to a shout. "Did I pick a good one for you or what?"

"She seems nice enough," Kaidan said, taking a large gulp of his beer. "But you know I've never really been in to blondes."

"No problem – just turn off the lights!" Tomas laughed.

Kaidan hid his grimace behind the beer. "Maybe I'll just get her number and give her a call the next time I've got some leave coming up," he said noncommittally.

"She'll be married with kids in secondary school before that happens," Tomas scoffed. "Once you're under Shepard's watch there is no off duty. She –"

"Look, Tomas, can you cut out with the crap about Shepard, okay?" Kaidan snapped.

Tomas took half a step back. "Fine, fine," he said, looking at Kaidan with a mixture of uncertainty and surprise. "I'm just trying to warn you, man, step careful around her. Even if you don't do anything yourself, if she so much as thinks you were in the same sector as an incident she'll write you up so fast you'd think she was operating on Salarian time."

Kaidan's eyes narrowed. _So that's why he's got such a sore spot for Shepard_…Tomas had always pushed the limits of the regs at the Academy, talking his way out of any serious punishment more times than Kaidan could remember. Shepard, unsurprisingly, had apparently dropped the hammer on him for some sort of infraction he was used to getting away with – and his description of the situation was no doubt quite different from the one she would give if asked. "I got your point," he said evenly. "I don't want to hear it anymore."

"Sure," Tomas replied, giving Kaidan a wan smile that looked as fake as it probably was. "Let's get you another beer. You really need to loosen up."

The reappearance of the ladies saved Kaidan from letting a nasty retort slip out. "Sorry about that," Katie said as Ellie glided up next to Tomas and accepted a fresh drink from him.

"No problem," Tomas said, the flirty grin back in place. "Kaidan and I were just talking about the band."

Katie brightened. "Do you like them?"

"They're a little heavy for my taste," Kaidan hedged, taking another large sip of his beer, "And a lot loud, but the guitarist is good."

"Oh, he's the best." Katie replied happily, studiously ignoring the sloppy kiss her friend was giving Kaidan's friend. "Everyone says he could make tons of money playing professionally – well, the whole band could – but half of them are still active duty."

"Really?" Kaidan didn't have to fake surprise – he'd just been guessing when he'd observed the guitarist was good, figuring it was a safe thing to say about any band. "What are they called?" Ellie, her arms wrapped around Tomas, lost her balance and knocked into Katie – the distraction let Kaidan sneak a glance at the amount of beer remaining his glass. _Fifteen more minutes…_

"90 Days," Katie answered, shooting a frown at the still-embracing couple. "They're my absolute favorite band – I've been to every show they've played in this sector in the last couple of years. I wish they'd put out an album, but I guess there are regs against moonlighting or that sort of thing." She took a step away from the couple and towards Kaidan, a determined, _make-the-best-of-what-you've-got_ look settling on her face. "I've downloaded every bootleg concert recording I can find, and about a year ago somebody printed up some cheap t-shirts with their logo on them and sold them down in the bazaar. I bought two so I'd have a replacement for when I wear the first one out."

"Looks like Saint's got one of those on tonight," Ellie chimed in, finally coming up for air.

Katie turned and squinted in the band's direction for a moment. "Oh yeah," she said, nodding. Kaidan followed her gaze – he'd seen the Alliance Navy logo on the bassist's shirt earlier, but hadn't noticed any other decorations on the varying types of black shirts all band members but the singer were wearing. The woman behind the keyboard was poured into a leather halter top – the drummer couldn't be seen – and the second guitarist remained too far in the back of the stage to be seen clearly. Finally, the guitarist swung around enough to expose the t-shirt he was wearing, which bore a yellowish circle with interior spokes and several short, talon-like spikes at regular intervals around the outside edge.

"A spiky wheel?" he asked, confused.

Katie shrugged. "I think so. You'd have to ask one of the real groupies up front if it means anything. I just think it looks cool." Kaidan nodded silently, dropping his gaze from the band to the fans closest to the stage, mostly women, who were packed together even more tightly than the rest of the crowd on the floor. He could see many of them were also wearing that same shirt, though some had modified it to fit their figures much more tightly. All were in black, jumping and shouting along as the club's lights flashed brightly, whether it was the shirt or something sheer layered over a tank top – there was even one woman in a sleeveless bodice with laces tied tight in the back –

The breath in Kaidan's lungs was punched out as the white light from the ceiling fell on the woman in the bodice, illuminating reddish-brown hair pulled into a tight knot and the pale skin of her neck and shoulders – square shoulders and toned, well-muscled arms raised into the air, a figure that could only belong to a marine. He didn't hear himself murmur an excuse to the others, didn't pay attention to where he left his beer as he headed into the crowd. She flickered in and out of his view as the waving arms holding drinks and datapads flailed back and forth in front of him, forcing him to duck this way and detour that way as the drinks came back down to be sipped or the datapads were lowered so their owners could see if they'd gotten a good shot of the band.

He moved towards the center of the floor as the band shifted into a different song, taking advantage of a momentary pause as the beat changed to slip through the first few groups. As the audience began to cheer and bounce again he was brought up short, stuck behind a tight knot of fans about ten meters behind her. Moving to his left, he maneuvered around them until he saw a nearly clear path between him and where she stood below the stage, directly in front of the guitarist. He took one step in that direction, only to be suddenly cut when he was nearly run over by a trio of screaming, laughing young women stampeding towards the back. They passed by quickly, delaying him just a few seconds – but when he looked back towards the front of the stage the woman was no longer there.

Shouldering his way into the midst of the crowd he looked around in all directions for a glimpse of those pale, bare shoulders or her distinctive hair but saw neither, only an undulating sea of black clothing and loose hair. As the music slowed he turned to head back towards the bar area, but a strange, itching sensation slowly moving up his spine prodded him to turn back around. The audience was calm, swaying gently with the slower beat of the interlude, giving him a clear view of the stage, and of the guitarist, whose hair had parted just enough to reveal one eye – an eye whose gaze was fixed on him.

As quickly as Kaidan's glimpse of the guitarist came it passed – he shifted, his hair swinging back into place and his head turning slightly as he seemed to move his attention to part of the crowd. Kaidan turned his head in that same direction, seeing a small door in the corner of the club, flanked by two bouncers and marked with a 'Private' sign. Shaking his head – Shepard, if she had ever been there, had moved on – he turned to leave as the music again crashed into another fast, loud crescendo, but the corner of his eye caught a flash of light as the side door swung open. He saw for a moment the silhouette of a bare-shouldered woman with her hair pulled up passing through the door, but then it swung closed again and she was gone.

He turned around for good this time, skirting around the edge of the club to avoid Tomas and the ladies as he moved quickly towards the exit. Pausing only long enough to give a nod to the ex-chief manning the door, he hurried out into the corridor – _just in time too_, he thought, watching the civilian police breaking up a fight a few doors further down. The elevator back up to the higher levels couldn't come quickly enough.

After an eternally long shuttle ride back out to the outer docking bays, the curved lines and alternating light and dark color of the _Normandy_ finally came into view. He hung his head, relieved and tired, as the familiar voice of the ship's computer scanned him for contaminants and processed him in. It was just coming up on midnight – enough time to get a couple hours' sleep and be waiting for Shepard in the mess in the morning.

"No luck tonight, Kaidan?" Joker's voice echoed down the hall from the cockpit. "You must be the first one back."

Kaidan walked through the bullpen and into the cockpit, leaning against one of the empty chairs behind the helmsman's station. "Figured I'd need my sleep," he said, looking down at the pilot, still wearing his cap and still running tests on the engines and nav controls. _Does he never leave?_

Joker chuckled. "Good idea. I'll probably knock off myself after these checks are done."

"Aren't we going to run those again tomorrow?" Kaidan asked, leaning in to see the results Joker was getting – all green, as usual.

"Yeah," he replied, shrugging, "But I like to be sure."

"Well, if you're not sure now," Kaidan sighed, "You never will be." Joker gave an 'eh' in response, focusing on his panels. "Anyhow, I'm going to crash. Tell Shepard I'm back – she'll be happy to hear that." He backed away and passed through the doorway into the bullpen.

Joker's voice stopped him short. "I would, but she's not here."

"She went ashore?" Kaidan asked, a chill settling on his skin.

"About ten minutes after you did," Joker replied, tapping the buttons to bring up the hull integrity display screen. "If I'm still here when she comes on board again I'll let her know."

Kaidan stood still for a long moment. "Yeah, sure, thanks," he finally managed to call out, dragging himself down the hall towards the stairs.


	2. Codes

Author's Notes: Many thanks to everyone who R&R'd the first chapter. I hope you'll continue to enjoy the military touches and a Shepard who kicks ass but sometimes stubs her toe along the way. I've tried to keep the Joker quotient high - it saddened me that he wasn't a bigger part of the story in the game, with his sense of humor and interesting backstory. Hopefully the next chapter won't take so long - I was slowed by a long vacation and two deaths in my family, and I don't intend to do a full-action narration of any subsequent chapters/planets - just the bits Kaidan is along for (if he can keep his eyes off his commanding officer, that is). Enjoy!

Chapter 2 – Codes

The alarm went off at 0530, its electronic chirps echoing through the small, crowded space of the male junior officer's quarters. The lieutenant from engineering jumped out of his bunk with a sharp thump, quickly followed by the equally crisp thumps of the two j.g.'s under his command, always fighting to see which of them could stay on his heel the most. Kaidan, happily isolated in a top bunk in the far corner of the room – he'd reported first and thus had his pick of the best spots – stuffed his head under his pillow, hoping the j.g. and the ensign under his own command would leave him alone long enough to sneak a few extra minutes of sleep. After one of the engineers thoughtfully hit the snooze button and the ringing in Kaidan's ears had a chance to subside he realized that his two junior officers were still snoring softly in their bunks. They hadn't been back on board when Kaidan had turned in, so there was no telling how much rest they'd had – or hadn't had. _The joys of command_, he grumbled silently, dragging himself down out of his bed and leaning across the small aisle to shake them out of their stupor.

Twenty minutes later, showered and shaved and trailed by two cleaned-up but heavy-lidded subordinates, Kaidan left their quarters to make the short walk down the hall and past the sleeper pods to reach the open-plan officer's mess. Captain Anderson's private quarters lay on one side and the medical ward on the other, with the stairs to the command deck and the elevator to the lower decks hidden just around the back wall. There was a small kitchen facility on one the lower decks but manning it was not part of the SOP for a shakedown, so a layout of vacuum-sealed, rehydratable breakfast foods and canned coffee was spread across the sideboard. Kaidan's stomach did a couple of somersaults at the sight – _thank goodness I didn't have very much to drink last night_, he thought, noting the yellow-green shade his charges had taken on. "Get something basic and not too sweet, and don't eat too fast," he said to them quietly. "And start drinking as much water as you can hold." They nodded, shuffling over to survey their options.

"Morning, Alenko," Joker called out happily, seated at the table and working his way through a slimy yellow hockey puck that probably was intended to resemble an egg and muffin sandwich. "How'd you sleep?"

"Just fine," he replied, fingering a circular silver package labeled 'Bagel w/ Cream Cheese'. "Have you seen the Commander yet?" Figuring the simulated dairy product wasn't worth the risk he opted for the 'Waffle w/ Fruit Filling' square-shaped brick.

Joker shook his head as he took a sip of coffee. "Nope. Didn't see her last night before I came below decks, either."

Kaidan dropped the waffle package into the rehydrator, reaching over to grab a can of coffee (with cream) as he listened to its familiar clickings and rumblings. _Was that her? What was she doing there? Who – _

"Good morning." Captain Anderson's voice rang out above the low murmur of conversation. Everyone who was seated rose and stood at attention, except Joker, as Anderson and Shepard emerged from the stairwell to the command deck. "As you were," Anderson said. Shepard struck an at-ease pose just behind him while half of the assembled officers lowered themselves carefully back into their seats. "We're going to be running some simulations today – not just for engineering and navigation, but also weapons, environment and life support systems, auto-repair. Some of them are combat scenarios, others accidental, in case something that's working now decides to break tomorrow. Adams – Joker –" Anderson inclined his head towards the seated engineer and pilot – "I want you to keep an eye on the stealth systems. Make sure they're working at max capacity."

"Keep an eye…on the _stealth_ system…?" Joker chuckled softly.

Anderson titled his head and scowled at Joker. "Each shift will also run a full zee-gee evac emergency drill," he added curtly once the grin faded from the pilot's face, motioning for Shepard to move up next to him. "I have another meeting to go to this morning," he said, concealing all but a hint of his exasperation, "So Commander Shepard will get you started. I'll see you all later." He traded short nods with Shepard before heading back towards the stairs and out of sight.

She stepped forward, arms clasped behind her back. "We'll begin by running all the diagnostics one more time. I want everyone at their posts by 0630 so we can be finished no later than 0800. If everything's green we'll start the simulations at 0830. The evac drill will be a random event, so no matter where you are on the ship or what you're doing make sure you know where the zee-gee suits and hatches are at all times. Any questions?" The sharp rustling of meal packets being handled was the only reply. "Alright then," she said crisply. "Finish your breakfasts. You'll need them." The other officers turned their gazes into their coffee as she made her way to the sideboard.

Kaidan took his packet out of the rehydrator as Shepard came alongside, frowning at the few remaining meal choices. "Good morning, Commander."

"Good morning, Lieutenant," she replied, gingerly fingering the edge of croissant-shaped packet. "Did you have a good time last night with Lieutenant Mathieson?"

"Ah…" He'd nearly forgotten Tomas and everything else that had happened before he'd caught sight of Shepard – _of might-be-Shepard_, he reminded himself. "Not really," he said, giving a shake of his head.

"That's too bad," she said lightly, taking a hold of the bagel Kaidan had passed up earlier. "Though if he still likes to go to the sort of place that would give anyone a headache I can't say I'm surprised."

The feeling drained from Kaidan's fingertips. _A headache…Of course she knows. It's in my file. And Dr. Chakwas would've been negligent not to mention it during her inbrief with Shepard._ "I – I wasn't there long," he said quickly, tightening his grip on his coffee to keep his voice even. "And I'd be more worried about hepatitis than headaches if I were him."

"Really?" Shepard frowned, turning the packet to squint at the nutritional information printed on its side. "That's too bad," she continued softly. "He could've been a good officer if he'd spent a little less time on himself and a little more on his duties."

Kaidan knew the sound of a quote from an Officer Evaluation Report when he heard one – _ouch_. "What about you, Commander?" he asked, clearing his throat. "Did you go out at all?"

She dropped her packet into the rehydrator, then reached over and took a can of coffee (regular). "I did, actually." Her voice and manner were as smooth as ever. "A few old friends happened to be in spacedock, so we got together for dinner and some drinks afterwards."

"Oh." He took a large bite of the tan sponge that was standing in for a waffle. _She didn't say she went to a club, but she did go 'out for drinks'…_ "Did you have a good time?" he asked, unable to think of any other follow-up.

"Yeah," she said, sounding surprised, "I did." The rehyrdator beeped softly as she slid the coffee into a pocket of her fatigues. "I have some inspections to make before we get started, Lieutenant," she continued, retrieving her packet and pulling one corner open to let the steam escape, eyeing its contents with reluctance. "I'll see you later on the command deck." She turned away and headed back the way she had come, speaking a few words of greeting to those she passed on her way to the elevator.

He suppressed the urge to kick the sideboard as she passed out of his sight, settling instead for slumping into a nearby seat. The mention of a headache could have been purely coincidental – clubs with loud music gave lots of people headaches, not just patrons who also happened to have L2 biotic implants. Though Shepard surely knew he suffered from occasional, severe headaches due to the implants, her comment could've been purely coincidental. Her criticism of Tomas, however, was deliberate and to the point – mission first, everything else second. He took another large bite of his waffle, chewing slowly. _Don't get distracted. Don't let her down._

* * *

"Critical hull breach detected," the _Normandy_'s VI chimed pleasantly. "Hull integrity at zero percent. Environmental systems at zero percent. Life signs: zero."

Shepard's sigh echoed through the comm. "That's twice now we've killed the _Normandy_ in this simulation. Analysis, anyone?"

"Other than 'we suck'?" Joker muttered, closing the simulation's display windows with a few hard taps of his main screen.

Kaidan leaned back in his seat, rubbing his hands over his face as he stared at the half-dozen warnings flashing on his screens. Shields down…engines disabled…weapons offline…the first several scenarios she'd run them through were tough – they'd died a few times but they'd figured things out quickly and moved on to the next simulation. But this latest one, the eighth one they'd attempted, was a killer. _Literally_, he sighed, listening to the silence stretching throughout the ship. Their fleet could barely hold their own against the anonymous enemy, holding their positions while taking heavy casualties, but then a fleet of enemy reinforcements would emerge from the screen of the asteroid belt in the lower right quadrant behind their position and blast them out of the sky. Even the second time through, when they knew they were coming, the _Normandy_ was disabled and disintegrating within twenty minutes.

"Anyone?" Shepard's voice asked again. She had been directing the simulations from the command and communications room further aft, and Kaidan could imagine her bent over in the captain's chair, rubbing her temple with one hand as her question was again greeted with silence. As the simulations ran she'd stepped back and been more of a conductor than a captain, giving advice and options but refusing to let any hint of her opinion slip, pushing the decision-making down onto the shoulders of the operational officers. Pressley had to decide which course to set to best approach an enemy position – Kaidan had to choose which of the _Normandy_'s weapons to fire, when, and from what angle – Joker had been constantly challenged to judge whether the _Normandy_ could execute the maneuvers Pressley and Kaidan called for. It had been challenging, exciting, terrifying, and gratifying all at the same time – but at the moment all Kaidan could feel was frustration.

One of the displays off to the left of Joker suddenly started flashing quietly. He glanced over at it, reaching for his comm switch. "Uh, Commander?" he called out.

"Finally," Shepard sighed. "What's on your mind, Joker?"

Joker shifted uncomfortably in his seat. "Um, ma'am, I've got a message from Captain Anderson, marked urgent."

"Simulation: pause," she said quickly. Panels and screens all around beeped compliantly and froze. "What is it?"

"He's on his way back," he replied, bringing the full text of the message up on the screen. "He's bringing somebody with him." He slid the display back and forth, rereading the message.

Shepard let out a sigh. "Who?"

"Some Turian," Joker said tightly. "Name of Nihlus."

The walls seemed to close in on Kaidan for a moment as Joker's words echoed in his ears. "When will they be here?" Shepard asked, her voice as calm as if she was inquiring after a cleaning crew.

"Ah – " Joker started to reply, but the whirring buzz of the decontamination system cranking to life stopped him short. "I'm guessing that's them in decon right now." He clicked his comm switch off to let her click in and reply, but the comm was silent. "Commander?"

"The simulation is paused, Lieutenant," Kaidan heard her say – but now her voice was coming not from the comm but echoing from the corridor behind them, underscored by the quick, ringing thuds of her boots on the deck as she approached. "Look to your station." She came to a halt in front of the airlock door and turned to face it as the decon system powered down.

Captain Anderson came through the doors first, crossing over to Shepard in two steps before stopping to trade salutes. Behind him followed a Turian – tall, as they almost all were, and with red and white striped markings coving most of the leathery grey skin stretched over his facial bones. His armor would've been impressive on its own – the markings of the Kassa Fabrication Corporation, a manufacturer of the highest quality – and price – were clearly visible, but the many customizations added both protection and prestige. The weapons attached to the armor were no less impressive and expensive – the pistol Kaidan could see on the Turian's left hip had enough firepower to turn standard Alliance armor into confetti.

"Commander," Anderson said, stepping to the side to allow the Turian to come closer. "This is Nihlus, with Citadel Special Tactics and Reconnaissance. He'll be accompanying us on our trip to Eden Prime."

Shepard shifted her gaze to the Turian, hesitating for only a second before snapping into another salute. Nihlus stared at her, unmoving, long enough to unnerve most humans – but Shepard held his gaze without wavering. After a good five seconds he broke the tension by shifting into a more relaxed stance, acknowledging her salute with a nod. "It's good to finally meet you, Commander," he said with as much warmth as was possible to convey through the metallic reverb that colored all Turian speech. "I've heard a lot about you. The reports of your achievements are quite impressive, especially for one as young as you." A muscle in Shepard's cheek twitched as she lowered her arm. "I look forward to seeing for myself how much of it is true."

"I just try to do my job and do it well," she replied calmly. "What other people want to make of that is their business."

"I should disbelieve what your admirals say about you?" Nihlus asked, his facial bones fluttering with polite disbelief.

"Exaggerating other people's accomplishments to further their own interests is what admirals do," Shepard shot back. Anderson dropped his head, pressing his lips tightly together. "It's how most of them got to be admirals," she continued, ignoring the captain's silent protest, "As opposed to actually achieving anything on their own."

Nihlus nodded slowly. "True." He turned back towards Anderson. "I don't want to keep you from your duties, Captain."

"Have you broken for lunch yet, Commander?" Anderson asked, keeping his eyes on the Turian.

"No, sir," she said quickly.

"Moretti!" the captain called out. The lieutenant who roamed the bullpen supervising the junior officers came forward, saluting nervously. "There are some vacant quarters down on the engineering deck. Take Nihlus down there and make sure he has everything he needs." Anderson slid out of the Turian's path. "The commander will show you around the ship after lunch."

Nihlus regripped the pack slung across his back, nodding again. "I'll see you then, Captain. Commander." He directed his final nod at Shepard before falling in behind the pale lieutenant who was all but sprinting for the stairs.

Anderson watched them go, waiting until the stairway doors slid shut behind Nihlus before letting out a long sigh. "How are the simulations going?" he asked, turning towards Shepard.

"Very well, sir," she said quickly.

"Good," he said, taking a step towards the helm. "Did you like the changes I made to the fourth scenario? They were your idea."

"Actually, sir," she said quietly, "Since you weren't here and I'm not familiar with the modifications you've made to your simulations since our last tour together, I decided to run my package instead."

Anderson arched an eyebrow. "Yours?"

"Yes, sir," Shepard replied, holding steady.

The captain let out another long sigh, shaking his head with a bemused smile. "How many times has the _Normandy_ been destroyed?"

"Only five, sir," she answered quickly, a hint of pride in her voice. "Once in the fifth, twice in the seventh, and twice so far in the eighth."

Anderson's head stopped in mid-shake. "They made it to the eighth?" he asked, the same touch of pride mingling with surprise.

"They did, sir." The corners of Shepard's mouth twitched upwards, threatening for a moment to break into a grin.

"Well." Anderson bounced on his heels, looking up and down the command deck with a satisfied smile. "Give them an hour for lunch instead of thirty minutes, as a reward." He turned back to Shepard. "We'll run my simulations when we resume, Commander," he said, half-heartedly reproachful.

"Aye aye, sir." She leaned over to reach a comm switch mounted on the bulkhead as Anderson turned and headed down the corridor towards the stairs. "Attention all hands, we are breaking for lunch," she spoke into the comm. "Be back at your stations in one hour."

"Sweet," Joker said, easing himself up and out of his chair. "Come on, Alenko – you don't want to get stuck with the Salisbury steak."

Kaidan grimaced – rumor had it that anyone who ate that meal was guaranteed to spend half their shift in the head. "Yeah, I'll be there. Just let me shut this program down." He started closing out the simulation's displays on his screens, pausing as he reached the last, central window showing the last positions of their fleet before the _Normandy_'s demise.

"So what'd you think?" Kaidan half-jumped out of his chair at the sudden sound of Shepard's voice. She leaned against the side of his chair, arms crossed over her chest while she contemplated the simulation's grim result.

"About…?" he began, nodding his head back towards the airlock.

She sighed, shaking her head. "If you can figure out why we've got a Spectre on board for a shakedown cruise then you let me know," she muttered softly. "I was wondering what you thought of the simulations."

He looked back at the flashing red dots indicating destroyed Alliance ships on his display. "Are you trying to kill us?"

"No," she replied, "But that does seem to be the result a lot of the time." He shook his head, closing the final window and shutting the simulation program down. "Every crew that's taken a run at this package has gotten stuck on the fifth or sixth exercise. You guys are the first ones to make it to number eight." A slight smile turned up the corners of her mouth.

"Lucky us," Kaidan muttered, leaning back in his chair. "Are we going to get another shot at it?"

She looked down at him, grinning. "Glutton for punishment, Lieutenant?"

"I don't like leaving things half-done, Commander," he replied with a shrug. "Anything worth starting is worth finishing. So I don't want to quit until I – we've – figured this one out." He felt rather than saw her body shift as her gaze burned into the back of his head, keeping his own eyes fixed firmly on the darkened screen.

Her reflection nodded slowly. "Well, then," she said, "Let me ask you this: do you believe every battle can be won?"

"Well, no," he said, shaking his head. "I managed to stay awake in my Strategics classes, Commander." Captain Pelham, a retired veteran of the First Contact War who'd taught that class for as long as anyone could remember, had a deathly dull lecturing style and a gentle, lulling voice that put at least half of her students to sleep every day. "I know sometimes a tactical retreat, whether to get a better position or to lick your wounds and link up with reinforcements, is the right move. The trouble is knowing when to make it. I haven't had to do that myself, yet, but…" Shepard nodded silently, encouraging him to keep going. "So victory in this sim is figuring out when to retreat?" he ventured, looking back at the screen, now filled only with the usual system status displays. "Otherwise, we're supposed to lose?"

"Well," she said slowly, "It is a modified triplanar version of the battle of Waterloo, with our fleet in the role of Napoleon. So you tell me." Kaidan let out a soft laugh and shook his head. "But when I was researching for this sim I noticed that for every article in military history journals describing why Napoleon lost there are two speculating on how he could've won." She leaned closer, giving him a mischievous smile. "So again, Lieutenant, you tell me." His skin tingled, warming, as she turned away and strode slowly into the corridor. He got up slowly to follow her down to the mess. _Probably nothing but Salisbury steak left_, he sighed, watching her start down the stairs, _but I don't think I'll mind_.

* * *

Wreaths of blue energy crackled around the _Normandy_. Joker gave his instruments one final glance as they moved past the abort line, counting down. "Hitting the relay in 3…2…1…"

Kaidan normally loved the small viewports tucked into corners of Alliance ships – taking a few moments to gaze at the various systems they patrolled broke up the sometimes dementia-inducing monotony of staring at the same gunmetal grey walls every day – but whenever the ship hit a relay the electric flash would flood the compartments. He felt his fingers tighten around the edges of his control panel as the _Normandy_ was pulled forward by the mass relay, free of even the minimal gravity of space for a moment. Even after just over a decade in the military and thousands of relay runs the noise and the flash still made him nervous. Two thumping beats of his heart later he felt the pushing sensation of the _Normandy_ returning to normal space. The whole sequence had always reminded him of a roller coaster back on Earth, the quick pull of acceleration followed by a short, hard stop. His fingers finally relaxed when he glanced out the starboard window and saw a normal field of stars.

"We are clear of the relay," Joker said casually into the comm, clicking it off as the _Normandy_ glided away from the Attican? relay. "Thrusters…check," he murmured. "Navigation…check. Internal emissions sink engaged. All systems online. Drift…just under 1500 K."

"1500 is good," Nihlus' voice said behind them. The Spectre had come forward just before they'd hit the relay, silently watching the jump. "Your captain will be pleased." He turned and strode aft.

Kaidan and Joker both twisted around as far as their seats would allow to catch a glimpse of the Turian's retreating figure. "I hate that guy," Joker said under his breath as he turned back towards his instruments.

"Not only does Nihlus actually talk to you, but he gave you a compliment; so you hate him?" Kaidan asked, confused. The Spectre had barely said two words to anyone who wasn't the captain or the commander since coming on board yesterday.

"You remember to zip up your jumpsuit on the way out of the bathroom? That's good," Joker snapped. "I just jumped us halfway across the galaxy and hit a target the size of a pinhead. So that's incredible!" He glanced up at the small viewport in front of them, checking the blurry reflections to be sure the Turian was out of earshot. "Besides," he added, his voice returning to its normal pitch, "Spectres are trouble. I don't like having him on board. Call me paranoid."

Shepard's warning back at Fleet HQ still buzzed in the back of his mind. "You're paranoid," he replied, hoping he sounded more certain of that than he felt. "The Council helped fund this project. They have a right to send someone to keep an eye on their investment." Having a Turian on board would've been weird enough by itself – having a Turian who also happened to be a Spectre wandering the ship and making it impossible to say three words to the captain or the commander without him around had the entire crew on edge.

"That's the official story," Joker snorted. Footsteps approached the helm, quick and firm but not heavy. "But only an idiot believes the official story."

The footsteps stopped just behind Kaidan on his left, between his seat and Joker's. He didn't have to turn his head to know it was Shepard. "You always expect the worst," she said, leaning over Joker's shoulder to get a look his instruments.

"Bad feelings are an occupational hazard," Joker replied, just as unsurprised as Kaidan that she had appeared. "We don't go anywhere unless there's a good reason, so what are we doing here?"

The comm crackled to life, sparing Shepard from giving him a vague response. "Joker!" Captain Anderson's voice barked. "Status report."

Joker sat up a bit straighter in his seat. "Just cleared the mass relay, captain," he said quickly. "Stealth systems engaged. Everything looks solid." Shepard stepped back, looking over at the navigation displays on the left side of the helm.

"Good," the captain replied. "Find a comm buoy and link us into the network. I want mission reports relayed back to Alliance brass before we reach Eden Prime."

"Aye aye, Captain," Joker said, reaching up to activate the comm relay. "Better brace yourself, sir," he added as the relay lit up and began searching for nearby signals. "I think Nihlus is headed your way."

The captain's reply came quickly, his voice sharp. "He's already here, Lieutenant," he snapped. "Tell Commander Shepard to meet me in the comm room for a briefing." The comm beeped abruptly as the captain closed the channel down.

Joker frowned at the comm switch. "You get that Commander?" he asked over his shoulder.

"I'm on my way," she sighed, her footsteps already moving away from the helm and into the main corridor.

"Is it me," Joker muttered as the comm relay beeped twice, linking in to a secure Alliance network, "Or does the Captain always sound a little pissed off?"

Kaidan shook his head. The captain had seemed twitchier than normal ever since Nihlus came on board – but then again, everyone was tiptoeing around their guest. "Only when he's talking to you, Joker," he said quietly, keeping his eyes locked on his instruments.

"Okay," Joker said, leaning back in his chair, "But then why did the captain nearly take Pressley's head off when we were passing through the heliopause?"

"I don't know," Kaidan shrugged. They hadn't heard what Pressley said to set the captain off, but Anderson's terse order to 'Keep your head in the mission' had carried through the entire command deck.

Joker's hands moved over his control panels, adjusting the _Normandy_'s course slightly as the gravity well of the approaching cluster began to pull them in. "What do you want to bet Nihlus was the topic of conversation?"

"Nothing." Pressley had mentioned that his father had fought in the First Contact War a week or so ago, when Anderson had taken all the officers to the O Club for an ice-breaking dinner – minus Shepard, as she hadn't yet reported. _Not like that would make things any worse_, he sighed, turning away from Joker in his chair to head off any further conversation. Most humans at least got nervous around Turians, if not openly hostile – he wasn't as unsettled as he'd feared he would be, but his palms still felt clammy any time he heard that modulated voice in the distance. Only Shepard seemed unaffected – _either that or I need to be sure I never sit down to a poker game with her_.

The comm let out a shrill series of beeps. "What the…" Joker sat up quickly and maximized the comm display on his main screen. "A distress call," he said grimly.

"What's the coordinates?" Kaidan asked, bringing up the weapons controls on his display. The Turian targeting systems adapted for the _Normandy_ gave it nearly ten percent more range than other Alliance frigates. "Joker?"

"Eden Prime," he whispered.

Kaidan froze. "What?"

"Hold on," Joker snapped, staring intently at his screen for a moment before slapping at his comm switch. "Captain!" he cried, "We've got a problem."

The comm crackled in response. "What's wrong Joker?" Anderson's voice replied.

"Transmission from Eden Prime, sir," Joker said quickly, his words running into each other. "You better see this!"

"Bring it up on screen," Anderson barked, the tension in Joker's voice spreading into his.

Joker punched the forwarding button, not bothering to close the audio channel to the comm room. The message began to play on Joker's comm screen as it relayed to the captain – a sudden crash of rockets and the chatter of assault rifles filled the helm. Kaidan leaned over to look at the jerking, blurry image. A female marine ran briefly into view, pushing whoever was holding the camera out of her way with a sharp "Get down!" The transmission flickered and whirled around as the sounds of battle grew louder and closer. After a few moments the shot turned in on itself to show the face of a craggy, middle-aged marine, his eyes wide and wild. "We are under attack!" he shouted. "Taking heavy casualties. I repeat: heavy casualties. We can't – augh!" A rocket impacted just behind him, knocking him briefly out of the shot. The message flickered with static as he got back up "-eed evac," he said, panic creeping into his voice. "They came out of nowhere. We need –"

The streaking roar of an incoming rocket drowned out his last word before a flash filled the screen. When it faded the camera was turned around again, showing a squad of marines backing up in the face of curtains of incoming fire. A bearded marine close to the camera suddenly stopped firing, coming out of his crouch and gazing slack-jawed at something in the distance. The camera pivoted, following the marine's gaze, focusing in on a ship hovering a few thousand feet above the ground. Kaidan and Joker both leaned closer to the screen. It was unlike any design Kaidan had ever seen – a large, conical body topping several finger-like extensions. _Not one of the standard corporate models pirates and smugglers buy – not Batarian – what is it?_ It was dark and menacing, advancing on the camera with a deep, spine-tingling rumble. Another rocket went off to the camera's left – the transmission blinked out, leaving only the sound and image of static.

"Everything cuts out after that," Joker said grimly, "No comm. traffic at all. Just goes dead. There's nothing."

"Reverse and hold at 38.5," the captain ordered sharply. Joker tapped a few controls and the distress call rewound, stopping on a clear shot of the mystery ship.

"That's big," Kaidan said softly, shaking his head.

Joker cocked his head to one side, frowning at the ship. "That's ugly," he snorted. "Looks like a – "

"Status report," Anderson's voice cut in.

Joker's eyes darted over to the navigation displays. "17 minutes out, Captain," he said, turning his head to check the scanner displays next door. "No other Alliance ships in the area."

"Take us in, Joker – fast and quiet," the captain said. "This mission just got a lot more complicated."

"Aye aye, sir," Joker replied, toggling the comm switch off and reaching for the engine controls. "Let's just hope that thing isn't waiting for us in low orbit when we arrive," he muttered, increasing the _Normandy_'s speed.

"That doesn't look like any kind of ship I've ever seen before," Kaidan said, looking closer at the screen.

Joker glanced at the frozen image one more time, then switched the screen off. "Me neither. Did you see –"

"Alenko! Jenkins!" Shepard called urgently over the comm. "Gear up and report to the drop ramp!"

Kaidan didn't waste time replying – he could hear the faint swishing of the doors to the comm room opening and the heavier sound of her footsteps taking the stairs down to the crew deck two at a time. He unbuckled his safety harness and stood up, looking for the junior weapons officer in the bullpen. "Ensign Sanchez! Take over!"

"Good luck down there," Joker said quietly.

Kaidan paused just long enough to give him a nod. "Good luck up here."

His gear was already down by the drop ramp, stashed in the junior officers' lockers in the cargo hold. Shepard was already there when he stepped off the elevator, buckling the last of her armor into place. He saw it wasn't the heavy, plated armor he'd expected her to have but more of a medium grade, pulling similar but lighter armor out of his own locker and snapping it onto his legs as quickly as he could. She locked a pistol onto her left hip – all her other weapons were pre-mounted on her armor – then picked up her helmet and looked over at him. "You almost ready there?"

"Yes, ma'am," he said quickly, feeling the fasteners around his arms lock together. His weapons were also pre-mounted on his back and hips.

"Turn around," she said as the door to the junior enlisted quarters slid open and a fully-geared up Jenkins stepped through. Kaidan complied, and Shepard began testing the weapons and joints on his armor to make certain they were secure. After a few seconds, and a few firmer tugs than Kaidan was used to, he felt her give him a hard tap on the shoulder – the all-clear signal. She kept hold of him and spun him around until he was facing her. "Check me," she ordered, turning her back to him and waving at Jenkins. "Over here Corporal – let's make sure we've all got our boots on straight today."

He felt himself begin to blush as he looked at her shoulders, the image of bare skin above a corset top floating behind his eyes – _get a hold of yourself, Kaidan,_ he thought, shaking his head. He'd checked down and been checked down by dozens of female marines before. _Shoulders – left back-to-front-joint – right back-to-front joint – hips – weapons – nothing to it._ He clenched his teeth together and reached out towards her. The checks were done in a few seconds, and tapped her shoulder just as she finished with Jenkins. "You're good, Commander." She nodded her thanks, putting her helmet on.

The elevator chimed. Captain Anderson barely waited until the door was halfway up before ducking under it and approaching them. "Stealth systems are engaged," he said as the drop ramp unlocked with a loud bang. "Your team's the muscle in this operation commander. Go in heavy and head straight for the dig site."

_Dig site?_ "What about survivors, Captain?" Kaidan asked, the images of those terrified marines in the distress call floating behind his eyes.

"Helping survivors is a secondary objective," Anderson replied, raising his voice as the ramp slowly opened and the roar of the engines flooded their ears. "The beacon's your top priority."

Shepard nodded. "Understood, sir."

The _Normandy_ slowed, descending closer to the surface. Kaidan reached back and grabbed a safety handle to keep his balance, gazing out at the spindly towers of the main settlement in the distance, pockmarked with jagged, burning craters sending plumes of smoke high into the atmosphere. _Dig site – beacon?_ he wondered, quickly glancing at the captain. _A recovery mission?_

A fifth figure approached the ramp – Nihlus, armored and armed except for a helmet, stepped up next to the captain. "Nihlus?" Jenkins asked, more confused than surprised. "You're coming with us?"

"I move faster on my own," the Turian replied, taking hold of his shotgun for a hot drop. Satisfied that his weapon was ready, he glanced up at Shepard, giving her a small, short nod. She returned the gesture, then watched him turn and walk off the end of the ramp into the orange sky of Eden Prime.

"Nihlus will scout out ahead," Anderson said as the figure of the Turian shrank and vanished in the clouds of smoke and dust. "He'll feed you status reports throughout the mission; otherwise, I want radio silence."

Shepard rested a hand on a safety handle, steadying herself as the _Normandy_ banked and dropped lower to the ground. "We've got his back, Captain."

"The mission's yours now, Shepard. Good luck." Anderson backed up several steps as the planet's surface came into clearer view – low, rocky hills dotted with groves of tall, threadbare trees and the usual prefab container-style settlements in the valleys between. There was no sign of the strange ship in the distress call.

The smell of ammunition smoke and burning flesh hit Kaidan suddenly, forcing him to take a step back and tighten his grip on the safety handle. Both scents were stronger than usual – _not good_. He glanced over at Shepard to see if she wore the same mixture of resignation and stoicism on her face, but her features were relaxed, her eyes closed. For a moment, he thought he saw her lips moving, but then she snapped her eyes open and straightened up, the hard set of her jaw chasing the moment away.

"We'll drop cold," she said, letting go of the safety handle and stepping out towards the edge of the ramp. "But I want weapons hot and everyone behind cover five seconds after we hit dirt." The _Normandy_ banked and slowed again, coming to a near stop over a small clearing in a stand of trees. A small light mounted above the cargo door flashed green – they were at their drop point. "Let's go!" Shepard cried, taking two quick steps before disappearing off the end of the ramp.

Kaidan released his hold on the safety handle and followed after her, tucking his arms and legs into his chest as he began to fall. Their armor's kinetic barriers would cushion the impact of hitting the ground, but if you landed in the wrong position you would break a limb or two when you started to roll. _I never understood why there was a infirmary all the way out by the Academy's jump training ground_, Kaidan mused, listening to the shrill whistle of wind in his ears as he lowered his head into the space between his arms, _until half of us had to go there after our first jump_.

The ground was dry and hard with no give to soften the teeth-rattling shock of impact after a fall of nearly ten stories. Kaidan landed cleanly, rolling after he hit for a few feet until he spotted a small outcropping of rock just to his left. He came out of his tuck and scrambled towards it, grabbing his pistol and bringing it up into the ready position as he planted his back against the rock. Taking a deep breath, he ran through his checks – nothing hurts – no weapons missing – scanner's clear.

His armor's internal comm sqwaked. "Shepard okay," her voice called out. "My scanners are clear. Alenko?"

"Alenko okay," he said. "Scanners are clear."

"Jenkins okay," the corporal said excitedly. "Scanner's clear."

The blue dot on Kaidan's scanners that indicated Shepard began to move. "All clear. Everyone on me." He slid out from behind his cover to face the clearing. Shepard stood in the center, her pistol in one hand as she looked at the displays and controls mounted in the armor on her other arm. She looked up as Kaidan approached and as Jenkins emerged from behind a large tree, cradling his assault rifle. "The dig site is about two clicks to the northeast. This path should take us there," she said, indicating a bare strip of ground snaking between the trees. "Keep your weapons hot. Judging from the looks on the faces of those marines in the distress call whatever we're up against here is bad news." Kaidan and Jenkins both nodded, tightening their grip on their weapons. "Jenkins, you take point. Alenko, you keep an eye on our six. Let's move."

They started down a gentle slope, bearing left when the path turned by the bank of a shallow, algae-filled pond. Jenkins stopped short as they approached a gap cut between two hills, gazing down at a twisted and charred body by the side of the path. Shepard tapped him lightly on the shoulder two times – the 'move ahead' signal – then glanced back to make sure Kaidan wasn't distracted. He gave her a 'Roger that' wave as Jenkins swallowed hard and quickened his pace. Cresting the top of a ridge, they caught sight of more of the colony's valleys and towers in the distance. Below, the path dipped down and turned a corner around a large cluster of rocks before leading up a bare hill topped with another small stand of trees.

Shepard moved alongside Jenkins, tapping him once to tell him to halt, then moved a few steps ahead and crouched behind the cluster of rocks, carefully surveying the exposed path before them for signs of an enemy presence. Kaidan fell in behind her, glancing at his scanner – nothing. After spending a few moments looking back and forth between her scanner and the top of the hill, Shepard waved Jenkins forward. She brought her pistol back up into a ready position, keeping a close eye on the empty path as Jenkins moved out from behind the rocks.

No sooner had Jenkins taken a step out into the open then a pair of small drones zipped out of the grove of trees atop the hill, their laser cannons firing at the corporal. Kaidan heard a scream over the internal comm as he raised his pistol and fired at the drones. The commander was already moving, laying down rapid bursts of suppressing fire with her pistol while moving into position behind a single boulder flanking the path several yards further uphill. Kaidan stayed behind and on the opposite side of the path to split the drones' fire, peeking over the top of the rocks sheltering him to fire at the drone closest to him. The drone turned to return the favor, but its top half separated from its bottom half before it could get off a single shot as Shepard took advantage of the lull in the fire coming her way. Both sparking parts fell to the ground with a sharp clang, joined several seconds later by the shattered, smoldering remains of the other drone.

They held still, guns trained on the top of the hill. A third drone drifted out of the trees, its slow and steady patrol cut short by two bullets smashing into its center eye. It clattered as it hit the dirt, rolling down the path until it bumped up against the fragments of the first two and stopped. Kaidan's scanner ceased pulsing – no more targets were within range. Still he waited until Shepard rose out of her crouch and lowered her weapon before he broke cover, turning back towards the crumpled figure of Jenkins lying in the middle of the path. He knelt besides the body, examining the still-smoking pair of holes in his chestplate. Shepard's footsteps came close, stopping just behind him. "Ripped right through his shields," he sighed, reaching his hand underneath the faceplate to close the dead eyes beneath. He felt her hand drop lightly onto his left shoulder. "Never had a chance."

Shepard swore. "So even the patrol drones have longer-range scanners than we do, and weapons that cut through our standard shields and armor like they're tissue paper. Great." She pulled her hand away, looking all around them. "Stay focused," she added sharply, glancing down at Jenkins as Kaidan stood. "The recovery team will take care of him," she said in a softer tone. "Let's move."

Their scanners started pulsing again as they approached the top of the hill – thee more drones were weaving their way through the clusters of tree trunks. Shepard waved him back to the other side of the path, again moving ahead of him to fire from a forward position. _Aggressive, take-charge, damn-the_ _– rockets!_ – Kaidan just barely ducked out of the path of a missile one of the drones had fired, hurrying to get behind one of the larger trees as the rocket blasted a smaller one into a cloud of splinters. The drones seemed to be holding their positions – _they must be on a proximity control_, he realized, _unable to travel beyond the range of the control unit's transmitter_. He leaned out from behind the tree, squeezing off a few quick shots before ducking back behind the safety of the trunk when the whizzing sound of incoming fire reached his ears.

The nearest drone shattered after four shots – Shepard, having adopted the same tactic a few trees further up made quick work of the second. The rocket-firing drone lingered behind the largest tree in the grove, drifting into view around their one o'clock just long enough to shoot at them before drifting back. Shepard looked back and gave him the 'covering fire' gesture. He nodded, training his pistol at the side of the tree the drone had come around before. As it floated into his line of sight he began to fire, keeping his aim above the head of the commander as she dashed towards another tree with a better angle on the drone's hiding place. The drone, sensing the movement, drifted out a little farther – Shepard hit the back of the tree and spun around, pistol up and firing – and the red-colored machine broke apart in the air and clanked to the ground.

Kaidan held his position for a few seconds, watching to see if any secondary patrols had been attracted by the noise. None came. "Scanners clear," he called in to the internal comm.

"Scanners clear," came Shepard's reply. They both came out from behind their cover and met on the path. "Good shooting."

He nodded in return, keeping his eyes on her as she turned and surveyed the path before them. _A good soldier never needs to be thanked for doing their job_, his instructor in all four years of 'Leadership and Effective Command' classes had said, _but a good commander always makes sure they are_. As she came back towards him he felt himself mentally tossing Tomas into a fusion incinerator – _she knows what she's doing._ "Commander," he asked, "What are we here for? Really?"

She frowned, crossing her arms over her chest. "I'm sure this is all kinds of classified, but if we're successful you're going to see it with your own eyes so intel will just have to pour themselves a stiff drink and get over it," she muttered. "Researchers here on Eden Prime uncovered a Prothean beacon. Our orders were – and are – to recover that beacon and deliver it to the Citadel for further study."

"So that's why Nihlus is here – to make sure this beacon is delivered safely," he said, nodding.

"Partially," Shepard replied quickly. "No time to discuss this further, Lieutenant," she continued, uncrossing her arms and giving him a look that said she'd already told him more than he ought to know. "We need to get moving."

Coming out of the trees, they looked out on another bare, rocky slope carrying the path down and away towards a collection of metal and stone in the valley between this hill and the next – the dig site. They hadn't taken two steps out into the open before another pair of drones appeared on their scanners, zipping up the hill. He felt Shepard grab his right arm, yanking him behind a large rock as he heard the sound of the drones' firing – quickly followed by the sharp crack of pistol fire. Shepard glanced at him, and he shrugged in reply – _wasn't me_. They slowly stood, keeping pistols in front and ready as their heads cleared the shelter of the rock. A short female marine was picking herself up off the ground, pistol in hand and the scraps of the drones at her feet, but her attention was riveted on a spot further down the hill. Two humanoid machines – _Geth?_ a voice in Kaidan's head whispered incredulously – had a hold of a wounded man. They seemed to be lifting him onto a tripod-like device – that suddenly lit up as a spike shot out from the center and sprang high into the air, impaling the man in the middle of his chest and carrying him aloft just below the tip of the spike.

He heard a sharp intake of breath from the commander. The lone marine further down the hill broke for the cover of a tall boulder just in front of them, grabbing for her assault rifle as she ran. Hearing her, the machines turned away from the tripod – but they barely took two steps towards the marine before bullets from Shepard's and Kaidan's pistols smashed into their heads. They slumped to the ground, metal clattering against metal as they fell.

The marine came out slowly from behind the boulder, looking left and right several times as Shepard and Kaidan approached to reassure herself that all the machines were destroyed. "Thanks for your help, ma'am…sir," she said, still breathing heavily as she saluted and looked from Shepard to Kaidan and back again. There was no rank insignia on Alliance armor to prevent enemies from identifying and targeting commanding officers.

Shepard returned her salute, stepping forward. "Commander Shepard, SSV Normandy. This is Lieutenant Alenko," she said, gesturing at Kaidan. He gave the marine a quick salute, watching her eyes widen briefly with the recognition of the commander's name.

"Gunnery Chief Ashley Williams, of the two-twelve," Williams replied quickly, lowering her arm.

"Are you wounded?" Shepard asked.

Williams shook her head. "Just a few scrapes and burns, nothing serious."

"Good," Shepard said, nodding slightly. "What's the situation?"

"Oh, man," Williams sighed, looking back at the two collapsed machines. "I don't know, ma'am. We were patrolling the perimeter when the attack hit." She pointed at a ridge topping the other side of the valley. "We tried to get off a distress call, but they cut off our communications. I don't know what's happened to the two-thirteen." Looking back over her shoulder she let out a deep sigh. "My squad tried to double back to the dig site, but we ran into an ambush. I don't think any of the others…" Her voice cracked. She blinked, swallowing hard. "I think I'm the only one left."

Shepard waiting an extra second before asking her next question. "Any idea what kind of enemy we're facing?" she said, her voice a little gentler than before.

Williams nodded. "I think they're Geth."

The voice in the back of Kaidan's head swore at the same time Shepard did. "The Geth haven't been seen outside the Veil in 200 years," he said. "Why are they here now?"

"They must've come for the beacon," Williams said quickly.

"We need to get to that dig site," Shepard said. "Williams – you're with us. Take point."

Williams snapped off another salute. "Aye, aye, ma'am. It's time for payback," she intoned.

"Payback will see to itself," Shepard replied sharply, "But only if we keep our heads. Stay careful." Williams' grim smile faded, but she nodded silently. "Alright, let's move out for that dig site," Shepard added, regripping her pistol as they all started down the hill.

As they approached the base of the Geth tripod they slowed, then stopped, looking up at the man the Geth had impaled. Dark streaks of blood covered the top few feet of the spike. The body was still twitching, sliding further down a fraction of an inch with each convulsion. "That man was still alive when they stuck him on the spike," Kaidan said softly.

"What makes you sure he's dead now?" Williams snarled. "Killing us isn't enough; the Geth want us to suffer."

Kaidan shook his head. "That thing punched a six-inch hole in his spine and took out half his major organs. He suffered all right, but it's over now."

"Let's move it, marines," Shepard said, her voice low and rough as she turned away.

The dig site was at the bottom of the hill, guarded by a handful of Geth. Williams and her assault rifle dismantled the unlucky ones patrolling outside the shelter of the circular stone structure, and Shepard and Kaidan waited patiently for the rest to poke their heads out far enough to take a bullet in the head. Once the scanners cleared they moved downhill and into the site. Several curved walls created a semi-enclosed circular space surrounding a raised platform – with no beacon standing at its center. Half a dozen of the Geth's tripods crowded the back half of the circular space, each topped with the body. Williams walked up to the edge of the platform, keeping her gaze fixed on the center of the stone floor. "The beacon was right here," she shrugged. "It must have been moved."

Kaidan looked around at the site, avoiding the sigh of the impaled civilians and marines – scanners and excavation tools were strewn about on the ground, and a few crates were tucked into what passed for out-of-the-way corners, but there were no lifting or loading tools. "By who? Our side or the Geth?" he asked.

"Hard to say," Williams replied. "Maybe we'll know more after we check out the research camp – it's just on the top of this ridge."

Shepard shook her head. "If they didn't evacuate they're dead. We won't – " She stopped, raising a hand up to the external comm controls on her helmet. After a few moments she turned to Williams. "Which way to the spaceport?"

"That way," Williams said, pointing at the path leading up the ridge. "Not even half a click past the camp."

"Nihlus will meet us there," Shepard said, nodding. "Let's not keep him waiting."

Williams came alongside Kaidan as they started up the hill. "Who's Nihlus?" she asked softly, slowing to let Shepard get a step ahead of them.

"A Turian Spectre – he's with us," Kaidan whispered quickly, seeing the scowl blossoming on Williams' face. "He seems alright."

"Alright?" Willaims said sharply. "A Turian?"

Kaidan shrugged. "He never said two words to me, but the captain gave us orders to work with him and the commander seems to trust him. So I salute and fall in." Williams frowned skeptically, but just tightened her grip on her rifle and quickened her pace rather than reply.

The camp had been hit hard. Storage containers were either blasted in half or lying on their sides and little fires were burning every couple of yards. There were no bodies on the ground and two of the three modular multi-use units were intact, but three of the pike-like machines they'd seen the Geth impale the wounded man stood off to the left, each fully extended and bearing one darkened, limp figure just below its tip. Kaidan heard Shepard curse softly through their internal comm as they approached the devices, her upper lip curled in disgust.

Just as they came into the central area of the camp the spikes crackled suddenly to life, retracting and dumping the bodies they had been carrying onto the ground. Shepard put out a hand to keep Kaidan and Williams back, raising her pistol with her other hand. He glanced down at his scanner, looking for Geth, but the only strange contacts he saw were located near the spikes. Looking back up, he saw one of the bodies twitch and start dragging itself upright in an unnatural, jerking movement. "Oh god – they're still alive?!" he exclaimed, breaking for the cover of a ruined mod unit.

"What the hell?" Williams yelled, backing up a few steps to get behind another container as two more bodies began moving. Only Shepard did not move from her position, simply raising her pistol into a firing position. As the first body let out rattling, throaty howl and began rushing towards them she fired, hitting it in the chest about four times before it collapsed to the ground in a shower of sparks. She redirected her fire towards the other two as they turned towards her, dropping them quickly.

Kaidan lowered his pistol and came out from behind the container, keeping one eye on his scanners. "I think we're all clear, Commander," he said evenly as Williams slowly approached them, her hands still gripping her rifle. Her eyes kept shifting back and forth from the body to Shepard, as if unsure which was more unnerving – the undead or the woman who'd coldly and calmly ensured they stayed dead.

"Check the mod units, just in case there are any survivors," the commander said as Williams came alongside. She pushed one of the bodies onto its back with her foot, studying it closely with a contemptuous curl of her lip. "Disgusting," Kaidan heard her snarl as he turned to search the unit on their right. Looking back and following her gaze he caught sight of a few scraps of clothing still clinging to the blackened skin of the corpse. "This must be what's left of the research team," she sighed.

He nodded sadly. "Those machines keep them alive and implant them with…" Bare metal wiring and parts were visible in patches where they'd broken through the stretched skin, but they didn't resemble any implants or synthetic replacements he'd seen before. "With some mechanical devices that compel them to attack when they're released."

Shepard shook her head, pulling her gaze away from the body. "I've seen some pretty inhuman s-"

"Commander!" Williams voice rang out over the internal comm. "I've got two survivors over here." Shepard and Kaidan turned to see her waving from the ramp leading to the doorway of the other mod unit. Wordlessly, Shepard turned away from the dead researcher and strode over to join Williams.

_The Geth aren't human_, Kaidan sighed, moving away from the body. _What else should we expect?_ Sentient machines whose organic masters – the Quarians – tried to exterminate them, the Geth had vanished behind the Perseus Veil after defeating the Quarians and driving them from their homeworld. Rumors of sightings floated around the Alliance forward posts closest to the Terminus Systems, but he didn't know of any that had been confirmed. _Their only experience with organic species taught them we're to be hated and hunted_, he thought, reaching the open doorway of the other mod unit and seeing only pools of blood on the floor that turned into streaks as they came near the door. He let out another long sigh, imaging the wounded researchers being dragged from the unit out onto the spikes. _Have they been building their forces for the last two centuries, planning to do to all organics what the Quarians tried to do to them?_

Turning away from the unit, he headed over to where Shepard and Williams stood with a man and a woman dressed in the typical bodysuits issued to Alliance and corporate field researchers. Both were visibly shaken, pale and nervous, the man much more so than the woman – he kept glancing around fearfully, hunching his back and shaking his head with an air of resignation. As Kaidan approached he heard the man let out a long, wailing lament, but he couldn't make out the words. Shepard's exasperated sigh and Williams' eye roll told him all he needed to know. "Have you seen a Turian?" Shepard asked tersely.

"I saw him," the man moaned, shaking his head again. "The prophet. Leader of the enemy. He was here, before the attack."

Shepard heard Kaidan coming up behind her, turning her head slightly to give him a _Huh?_ glance. "That's impossible," he said, moving alongside the commander. "Nihlus was with us on the Normandy before the attack. He couldn't have been here while it was going on."

"I'm sorry," said the woman, a doctor and a supervisor by the look of the insignia on her bodysuit. "Manuel's still a bit…unsettled."

"Alright," the commander said. "You two stay here and lock the door behind us. I think we've cleared the Geth out for now, but it may be a while before enough reinforcements arrive to secure the area." The woman nodded nervously; the man just let out a soft moan and buried his head in his hands. Shepard turned away from the researchers to face Kaidan. "The beacon was moved to the spaceport this morning." She shifted her gaze over to Williams. "Let's get moving."

"You can't stop it!" the man cried. "Nobody can stop it! Night is falling. The darkness of eternity.

Shepard stifled a sigh and began walking away. "Yes, ma'am," Kaidan and Williams chimed in unison, falling into step behind her.

They hadn't gone more than twenty yards down the path to the spaceport when the sound of a single, sharp recoil echoed through the rocky hills. Shepard stopped abruptly, putting up her hand to halt the others. "Did you hear that?" she asked quietly.

Kaidan nodded. "That was a pistol shot."

"The Geth don't use pistols," Williams said.

"Nihlus," Shepard growled, pulling her pistol back out of its holster. "On the double, marines!"

They navigated their way around a hairpin turn taking them to the backside of the ridge – Shepard first, establishing point, then waving Kaidan through into the clear as Williams covered their rear. Kaidan started down the path towards the collection of low buildings and platforms at the bottom of the hill – the spaceport – but stopped short as a deep, unnerving metallic roar echoed through the valley. A strange ship was slowly rising into the sky from the area just behind the spaceport. Electricity crackled red all around the ship as it left a thick, dark cloud of smoke in its wake, billowing out from the lower part of the ship where the conical body split into half a dozen finger-like branches – just like the ship in the distress call, Kaidan realized, feeling his pace slow. Shepard also paused, keeping her pistol up in the ready position while she came to a stop at the crest of the ridge. "The hell..?" Kaidan heard himself breathe, stopping just a step behind Shepard and craning his neck skyward to watch the ship.

"That look like anything you've ever seen before, Alenko?" Shepard asked quietly over her shoulder, tilting her head up ever higher to watch the ship's ascent.

He shook his head as the roiling clouds of dust left in the ship's wake began to veil it from their sight. "No ma'am," he replied, surprised at the nervous quiver he heard in his voice.

The churning, rumbling mechanical sound that had filled their ears finally began to fade as the ship moved higher and vanished behind the clouds of the planet's upper atmosphere. "Me neither," Shepard said evenly, lowering her head. "Maybe there's something at the spaceport that can –" The high-pitched warning beep of her scanners cut her off. Kaidan instinctively ducked as the same shrill sounds echoed in his helmet. A bullet whizzed by, missing them by several feet but smashing into the nearby rock with a sharp chatter. Half a dozen Geth and a handful of those mechanized corpses were quickly advancing up the hill from the spaceport. There wasn't any cover they could reach in two or three steps, so as Shepard pulled out her pistol and began to fire she dropped down on one knee, going low so Kaidan could fire high. Williams simply raised her assault rifle and blasted away. The Geth – the same, seemingly basic model they'd been seeing – weren't too bright, advancing straight up the exposed pathways without even trying to take cover. They fell quickly, and the corpses charging mindlessly behind them hit the ground a few seconds after their creators.

"They know we're following after the beacon," Shepard said, standing back up and dusting off her armor. "There's going to be a squad of these Geth around every corner – and the closer we get the more likely they'll put up a better fight than these buckets of bolts." She lifted her pistol up, checking its settings. "I want weapons hot – we move by cover and advance only, checking every corner and crevice we go by. I don't want anything crawling up our backside."

"Yes ma'am!" Williams barked, chambering another clip of ammo in her rifle. Kaidan simply nodded as Shepard turned her eyes onto him, holding her pistol out in front of her, its muzzle angled down at the ground. "There's a storage shed at about two o'clock – want me to check it out?"

Shepard shook her head quickly. "Hold up there, Chief – I think there's something inside." Kaidan craned his neck to look down the hill at the shed in question – there did seem to be two or three human-shaped shadows lurking behind the darkened windows. "Could be human, could be Geth, could be –" The door to the shed suddenly slid open. All three marines quickly raised their weapons as one of the shadows moved towards the open space. A human head – male, alive and unmodified by the Geth – peeked around the opening. He caught sight of the marines and immediately raised his hands into the air, shuffling nervously out onto the ramp. Another man and a woman quickly followed him out of the shed, glancing around at the fallen Geth. Shepard frowned, tilting her head towards Williams. "Do they look familiar?"

The marine nodded quickly. "Yeah – local farmers. The one in the middle is named Cole – can't remember the other two." She took a step closer to the commander. "Rumor had it they were involved with a smuggling ring skimming weapons and mods from military shipments and reselling them on the black market."

"Really?" Shepard intoned, her eyes narrowing. "That ship landed at the spaceport – maybe their little ring had something to do with that." She lowered her pistol into a safe position but kept it in her hands. "Let's chat."

The three farmers stopped a few steps in front of the shed, their arms still raised. All looked pale and frightened, glancing fearfully at the remains of the mechanized corpses. The man in the center – Cole – slowly lowered his arms as the marines approached. "Those…things were crawling all around the shed," he said. "They would have found us for sure. Thanks."

The woman to his left shook her head, reaching a trembling hand up to wipe sweat off her brow. "I…I thought it was all over when I saw that ship," she said quietly.

"It showed up right before the attack," Cole said. "Knew it was trouble the second I saw it. So we made a break for the sheds." The man on Cole's right glanced back at the shed, frowning.

"Anything else you can tell me about the ship you saw?" Shepard asked, shifting her gaze from Cole to the other man and back again.

Cole shook his head. "I was too busy running to get a clear look at it. I think it landed over near the spaceport."

"Tell them about the noise, Cole," the woman wailed, cradling her head in her hands. "That awful noise…"

"The ship was emitting some kind of signal as it descended," Cole began uncertainly. "Sounded like the shriek of the damned. Only…" he paused, shaking his head, "It felt like it was coming from inside your own head." He let out a long sigh, looking up at the sky above the spaceport. "I can't really describe it – it just felt like it was inside my head at the time I was hearing it, tearing right through my skull. Almost made it impossible to think."

Kaidain leaned close to the commander. "Some kind of jamming signal, maybe?"

"Maybe," Shepard breathed. She fell silent for a long moment, shifting her eyes from Cole to the other farmers and them back to him again. "So," she said, her tone soft and light, "How much do you know about the operations at the spaceport?"

Cole's expression just barely flickered, but the other man started glancing nervously from the spaceport to Cole and back again. "Not much," Cole said evenly. "Why?"

"The beacon was just moved to the spaceport this morning," Shepard said calmly. "So the only way for the Geth to know it was there, rather than still at the dig site, was if they had some inside information."

"Um…" Cole paled, shifting his weight back and forth. Kaidan regripped his pistol as Shepard allowed herself a small smile, knowing that Cole knew he was busted. "Look," he sighed, "Some guys at the spaceport were running a small smuggling ring. Nothing major. In exchange for a cut of the profits we let them store packages in our sheds. But they don't tell us anything in advance – they just call when the stuff's here and they need us to store it. And they've never talked to us about anything else that happens down there." He started to take a step closer to Shepard, but stopped when she lifted her pistol out of the safe position to aim somewhere around his knees. "We didn't know anything about this beacon, I swear," he continued, his voice quivering slightly. There was a rumor going around the bars a week or so ago that they dug up something strange, but we didn't know – we didn't care. Until today."

Shepard stared back at him for several seconds before slowly lowering her pistol. "Lieutenant," she said, tilting her head towards Kaidan, "Check out that shed. Take anything you find that we could make use of."

"Yes, ma'm," he said sharply, stepping around the farmers and into the shed. There wasn't much – a few farming tools and supplies, but the secure storage locker at the back was promising.

"Who's your contact down at the spaceport, Cole?" he heard Williams' voice echo from outside the shed.

Kaidan fired up his omni-tool and started working on the storage unit's lock. "I'm no snitch," came Cole's sneering reply.

"Right. Let's try this again," Shepard snapped. Kaidan's omni-tool beeped happily as the lock disengaged and the unit's door slid open. "This strange ship landed at the spaceport, where the beacon just happened to be. Your 'friends' work at the spaceport. Given that they're already running a smuggling ring I think we both know their information could be bought, and probably not for too high a price."

"Uh…" Kaidan couldn't help grinning slightly as Cole stammered, almost feeling the burning iciness of Shepard's glare through the shed's walls. The storage unit yielded a couple of pistols, some extra ammo and a few nice mods for their weapons. "Yeah, okay," Cole sighed. "His name's Powell. If he's still alive."

Kaidan scooped up all the military equipment he could see and headed back outside. "Finished, ma'am."

She reached out and snatched one of the pistols from him, looking pleased. "Much nicer than the standard one," she murmured, slipping her ammo into the new gun and sliding the old one into a storage space in her armor. "We have to go," she continued, tilting her head towards the farmers. "You guys might want to stay in that shed until more reinforcements arrive."

"Sure," Cole said, nodding nervously.

Williams took a step towards the farmers as Shepard began to move away. "Some of my squadmates might still be alive if they'd had this equipment today," she hissed at Cole, "You're going to pay for –"

"Chief!" Shepard said quickly. "We have business at the spaceport." Williams hesitated, taking another step towards Cole. "This will be in my AAR, Chief," Shepard added, her voice sharp and insistent. "They'll get theirs. We need to get to that beacon."

The young marine glared at Cole for a second longer, then turned away. "Yes, ma'am," she said through clenched teeth, marching ahead of Kaidan and Shepard to take point. Shepard watched her go for a few moments, seemingly deciding whether to say anything to Williams now or hold it for later, but in the end she just fell in behind her as they started down the path to the spaceport.

While severely damaged and partially afire, the spaceport was in better shape than Kaidan had expected to find it. Most platforms were intact, and the fires seemed limited to cargo bays and work areas. The Geth needed the facility intact so they could use it to get the beacon, he reasoned as Williams reached the first set of stairs leading up to the loading platforms. No bodies were in sight – he didn't see any more of those spikes, but they couldn't be far. He was so focused on guarding against an ambush from around the corner it took his brain a minute to register that there was one body visible, lying out in the middle of the platform. "Commander," he called out over the internal comm, recognizing the shape and size of the body and that wonderful armor that it had always worn, "It's Nihlus."

Shepard turned abruptly towards him, her shoulders slumping as she caught sight of the Turian. "Well, sh –"

"Something's moving!" Williams cried, jerking her rifle into a firing position. "Over behind those crates!"

A pair of hands appeared above the nearest stack of crates. "Don't - don't shoot!" a man's voice cried, shaking. "I'm one of you," he added, slowly rising up from behind the crate.

Shepard kept her pistol pointed at the man's head. "Who are you and what are you doing here?"

"I was hiding from those creatures," he whispered, looking around frantically as if merely thinking of them would cause them to appear. He seemed to take no notice of the weapons aiming at him. "The ship screamed in my mind. Then the machines came, and made everyone into…" Shaking, his voice trailed off as he stared at his hands.

The commander lowered her pistol. "Who are you?" she asked in a softer tone.

"My name's Powell," he replied vacantly.

Williams started at the sound of his name, but before she could get a word out Shepard held up a hand, looking back over her shoulder with a let-me-handle-this look. The young marine rocked back on her heels, silent. "Did you see what happened to Nihlus?" Shepard asked, turning back towards Powell and nodding in the direction of the Turian's body.

Powell followed her gaze, staring blankly at Nihlus' body for a moment before suddenly seeming to understand what she was asking. "The other one shot him," he said, half-horrified and half-bemused. "The other one got here first. He was waiting when your friend showed up." Powell raised one hand. "He," he continued, jabbing his hand in Nihlus' direction, "Called him Saren. I think they knew each other. He seemed to relax. He let his guard down…and Saren killed him." Powell dropped his hand, letting it bang against his thigh with a surprisingly loud smack. "Shot him right in the back," he said, lowering first his eyes, then his head.

"You're saying Nihlus was murdered by another Turian?" Shepard asked evenly. Powell merely nodded, prompting a frustrated sigh from the commander. "We were told a Prothean beacon was brought to the spaceport this morning," she continued tightly. "What happened to it?"

"I don't know," Powell shrugged. "It's probably over on the other platform – that's where that Saren went after he killed your friend." He waived a limp arm in the direction of an open-air cargo tram on the other side of the platform. "That's where that ship landed, where the machines came from…they killed everyone," he whispered, squeezing his eyes shut and shaking his head like that could rid his mind of the memories.

Shepard leaned back on her heels, frowning. "Your involvement with illegal activities here at the spaceport wouldn't have anything to do with why you're alive and they're not, would it?"

"Wha – no!" Powell cried, his eyes wide with fear. "How…" Shepard's face darkened into a _don't-try-it_ scowl. "We just skim a few pieces off the top of the military orders – nobody misses it." Williams stirred next to the commander, but stayed silent. "I – I was…I was taking a nap," Powell whispered, dropping his head into his hands. "That's why the machines didn't see me." Williams let out a disgusted sigh, shaking her head at Powell. "I can't stay here. I need to get away from all this," he cried, turning away from the marines.

Shepard watched Powell go, muttering softly to himself, until he turned a corner and passed out of sight. She snapped her head back around to face Williams and Kaidan. "If that lazy…" She paused, shaking her head in disgust. "If he's the best they can do for a criminal mastermind then this operation didn't have anything to do with the attack," she spat. "Any inside information the Geth had about the beacon came from somewhere else – somewhere higher –"

A single shot rang out. "Did you hear that?" Williams asked sharply, glancing all around for the source.

"Yeah," Kaidan replied, glancing at the commander. She was gazing grimly at the area Powell had headed towards, and as Kaidan stepped around a crate for a clearer look he saw a pair of legs jutting out from behind the wall, lying motionless as a thick rivulet of blood crept into view. A metallic clicking sound caught his ear as he turned – whipping his head back around he saw the shadows of several Geth approaching from the other side of the platform. "And we weren't the only ones," he called out, sliding behind a large crate for cover as the Geth advanced. Shepard and Williams, their sensors blaring, stepped back from Powell's body and scrambled for the nearest cover. A grenade sailed through the air, clanking to the ground in the middle of the Geth formation. The nearest trooper watched it land, following its bounces along the floor curiously, then turning his head to see where it had come from just before it detonated, cutting it and the half-dozen troopers around him into twisting, sparking hunks of metal and wire. A few quick bursts from Williams' rifle finished off the few that survived the blast.

Shepard waived them towards the cargo tram, peeking over the railing as they approached its platform. "Half a dozen of the basic models," she called out over the internal comm, taking a few carefully aimed shots at the tram below. "Make that four," she said after taking another look, "Plus one…bigger one."

They moved carefully onto the tram – getting behind cover, then taking turns laying down some suppressing fire and leapfrogging forward. They'd made it nearly halfway, close enough for Shepard and Kaidan to start picking off the Geth troopers further down, when a loud rumbling sound drew their attention – the 'bigger' Geth, several feet taller and much more heavily armed and armored, was hurtling down the central aisle towards them. "INCOMING!" Williams yelled, redirecting her fire. Shepard reached back for her shotgun, but the machine was too close – Kaidan shifted his pistol to his left hand, concentrating on the muscles in his right arm. _Elbow…arm…up…release_ – a wreath of crackling blue biotic energy rippled down his arm and blasted towards the Geth, slamming into the machine and knocking it nearly all the way back to the front of the tram. A few bursts from Williams' assault rifle ensured it didn't get up.

The few remaining Geth on the tram fell quickly and Shepard scrambled up to the controls at the front, slapping at the central button to activate the tram. It rumbled to life and started sliding down the rails as Williams slumped against the nearest railing, breathing hard. "You guys alright?" Shepard asked over her shoulder, alternating between checking the tram's controls and her scanners.

Williams nodded. "Fine. Just…whoo."

"Yeah," Kaidan breathed, finding a solid piece of metal to rest his back against.

"Well, there's going to be more of that where we're headed," Shepard said grimly, "So catch your breath and make sure your clips are full."

Kaidan popped his pistol open, glancing over at the crumpled figure of the large Geth while reaching for some spare ammo in his utility belt. _That thing went pretty far,_ he mused, refilling his clip. _I haven't uncorked a wave that powerful since…_ He always maintained tight hold on his abilities – purely clinical, mechanical triggers, carefully targeted. If he let his concentration slip and acted on instinct the results could be unpredictable and uncontrollable…_dangerous._ _Why did I – _

"Thirty seconds out," Shepard intoned.

He looked up at her, his eyes sliding down the curve of her shoulders to her back as the answer to his question flickered wordlessly in his mind. _Focus, Kaidan_, he snapped at himself, closing his pistol and standing up as the other platform came into view. _No distractions._

No Geth were waiting for them on the platform, but a large, cylindrical device beeped softly off to their left as they got off the tram. "Demolition charges!" Kaidan called out, hurrying over and crouching down next to the control panel.

"The Geth must have planted them," Shepard said, coming alongside. "They're going to blow the spaceport after they've taken the beacon." She knelt next to him. "Can you disarm it?"

"What do you think your taxes pay me for?" Kaidan grinned, holstering his pistol and firing up his omni-tool.

Shepard stood. "Not your witty sense of humor, obviously," she chuckled.

"Hey now," he grumbled half-heartedly as his omni-tool chirped, its task completed. "How many more?"

"Three," she said, looking up from her scanner as he stood. "All on the upper levels. I'll take point – Williams, you take the rear."

They moved unopposed up the ramp to the upper levels. Crossing over to the other side of the tracks Kaidan began to see shadows moving and heard the whiz of bullets flying by. Shepard waived him over towards the second charge, tucked around a corner to their left, as she and Williams took up positions firing back at the Geth guarding the path through the spaceport. His omni-tool went to work as the red dots on his scanners started blinking out while the two blue ones advanced. Finished, he scrambled to his feet and hurried towards the location of the third charge, just behind the wall Williams was using for shelter. A rocket flew by as he started to disarm it, prompting Williams to turn and fire back at its source with an excited whoop. Another red dot vanished from his scanners as the charge beeped and went dark. "The fourth one is at the end of this walkway!" he called into his comm.

Shepard moved out from behind a crate and advanced quickly down the walkway, slowing to check that each corner was clear as she passed. A lone Geth patrolled the open area where the fourth charge lay – one shot from the commander's pistol sent it clattering to the deck. She led him to the charge, stepping aside to cover him as he knelt down and activated his omni-tool. Kaidan watched the seconds on the timer continue to tick down as he worked – there was still nearly a minute left, but he felt a cold sweat sweep over his forehead nonetheless as he waited for the tool to do its work. After an interminable several seconds he heard the dual beeps, the omni-tool signaling completion of its task and the charge powering down. "That's it," he said, pulling his pistol out as he stood.

"There's the platform," Williams said, jabbing her rifle at an open area below them. More crates dotted the platform – a couple of the Geth tripods, topped with the bodies of slain dockworkers, loomed in a far corner – and in the center stood a tall, thin tower, dark metal surrounded by a faint, shimmering green mist.

Kaidan risked a glance at his scanners – they were clear. "I think we're good, Commander," he said.

Shepard swept her gaze and her gun over the length of the platform twice more before relaxing, checking her own scanners before holstering her pistol. "Is that the beacon?" she asked Williams, nodding her head at the tower in the center of the platform.

"Yeah," Williams, said, locking her rifle back onto her armor. "But I've never seen it…glow."

The energy field surrounding the beacon seemed to pulse and brighten as they approached. "Is it…is it on?" Kaidan gaped, moving closer.

"It's here – that's enough for me," Shepard said, reaching up to activate her external comm. "_Normandy_, the beacon is secure. Request immediate evac."

"Something must have activated it," he whispered. In the distance he heard Shepard acknowledging the Normandy's reply, but a soft, swirling sound in the back of his head drowned out the actual words. He took another step towards the beacon – the murmurs in his mind crescendoed – and the energy field surrounding the beacon pulsed, expanding, suddenly dragging him closer. "What the – " he started, slamming all his weight down onto his feet, trying to resist the pull of the beacon. For a moment it seemed to work, but the beacon pulsed again, the green light growing brighter, and he continued slipping inevitably closer. The noise in his mind grew – he felt himself begin to fall –

Something slammed into his right side, knocking him back. Stunned, he shook his head, trying to hear anything other than the strange whispers, when he felt himself being grabbed and thrown along the floor. He rolled and looked up – Shepard, on her knees, lay in his place, her hands grabbing at the deck as the energy field took hold of her. The beacon pulsed again – she was lifted up off the platform and suspended in midair in front of the beacon. "Shepard!" he cried, scrambling to his feet, but before he could approach Williams wrapped an arm around his waist, holding him back.

"No – don't touch her!" Williams yelled. "It's too dangerous!"

The energy field shimmered and trembled around Shepard. Her arms and legs still jerked, trying to pull away, but her head was firmly tilted up at the beacon, shaking in time with the beacon's tremors. The noise in Kaidan's mind rose in volume and pitch, forcing him to press his hand against his helmet – a loud bang rang out. The noise died as the beacon's tower exploded, sending Shepard flying backwards through the air. She slammed into the floor with a dead thud as pieces of debris from the beacon fell softly all around. "Shepard," he breathed, shaking off Williams' grasp and scrambling to the commander's side. He turned her over gently, activating the medical scanners on his omni-tool. _Breathing…neck and spine intact…_ "_Normandy_!" he screamed, toggling his external comm, "What is your ETA?!"

"Thirty seconds," Joker's voice replied. "You guys okay?"

"No!" Kaidan shouted. "The commander's been hurt – get here!"

The captain's voice rang into his ear. "How badly?"

"I don't know – I think she's unconscious," Kaidan snapped, yanking her glove off to feel her pulse – normal. The whine of _Normandy_'s engines streaked above him. "We need a med team!" he yelled, shielding his eyes as the air around him whirled. When he looked up again med techs were swarming around Shepard, fitting a brace around her neck as Dr. Chakwas barked orders. Pushed aside, Kaidan staggered back to where Williams stood, stunned, staring at the ruined beacon.

"What happened here, sir?" she said softly.

Kaidan shook his head as the med team began sliding a backboard underneath Shepard. "Nothing good."


	3. Walls

Chapter 3 – Walls

Kaidan sat alone at the table in the officers' mess, his head buried in his arms. The slightest sound jerked his head up, looking to see if the door to the med bay was opening – to see if Shepard would come striding out, grinning and shaking her head at him. But each time, fourteen in the hour since he'd been declared fit and kicked out of the med bay, the noise came from somewhere else. The doors remained closed.

_She pushed me out of the way._ He hunched his shoulders to make the shelter around his head a little higher. A few of the other marines in his squad had come by earlier, glad he was alright but really wanting to know more than the nothing they'd been told about what had happened groundside. Several other less familiar crew members tried to approach him, whispering between themselves about the mysterious ship tracked leaving Eden Prime, but when the moments ticked by with his forehead firmly planted on the table they slowly shuffled away. _It would've been – should've been – me there in front of the beacon. Should be me lying there in the med bay._ He shook his head as much as the confines of his arms allowed. _Why did she –_

Another noise sent every muscle in his body twitching – his head came up, turning immediately towards the med bay doors. This time his patience was partially rewarded as the doors slid open and Chief Williams shuffled slowly through them, a handful of medi-gel patches dotting her arms and face. "Hey there, L-T," she said, managing a weak smile as she dropped into a chair across from him.

"Chief," he replied. "You okay?"

She shrugged. "Yeah. Just a couple of cuts the doc says should be healed up in a few hours."

Kaidan nodded nervously. "And the commader?"

"Still out," Williams frowned, slumping in her seat.

The doors slid open again. Captain Anderson came charging out, his face grim. "Lieutenant – in my office," he snapped, pivoting and heading for the door to his quarters.

"Yes, sir," Kaidan said quickly, giving Williams a reassuring look as he slid out of his seat and followed the captain. He'd given Anderson the executive summary version of what had happened as soon as he'd come back on board, but everything had been moving so fast he couldn't remember what he had or hadn't said.

He'd never been in Anderson's quarters before – the front half was set up as a small office, with a desk and conference table. Concealed behind a shoji screen, the back half held the more private living space, including a full-sized bed and a large locker. Anderson gestured at one of the chairs around the table. "Have a seat, Alenko," he said, dropping down into one of the opposing chairs. "You're alright?"

"Yes, sir," Kaidan said, sitting. "How's the commander?"

"Unconscious," Anderson sighed. "Dr. Chakwas thinks there's no real damage," he continued, frowning, "But while she's confident Shepard will wake up, she can't say when." He closed his eyes for a moment, then inhaled sharply and opened them again, leaning onto the table closer to Kaidan. "The situation is bad – a dead Spectre, the beacon destroyed, the Geth on the attack. Every thing that happened, every decision Shepard made is going to be scrutinized and criticized."

Kaidan felt a warm rush of anger rising through him. "Every choice she made was the right one given the mess we found ourselves in," he said tightly.

"I don't doubt that," Anderson sighed. "Others won't be so sure." He cleared his throat and shook his head. "The after-action report for this mission needs to be written as quickly as possible. There are people who need to know what happened before they can make decisions about what to do next. With Shepard out indefinitely, I need you to draft it."

"Yes, sir," Kaidan said flatly. Out of all the administrative bull associated with being an officer, AAR's were the task he hated most.

"Don't try to massage anything to try to make it look better," the captain continued. "The people who will be reviewing this report will spot it immediately. Details will be very important – you never know which piece of information will turn out to be crucial later, so don't leave anything out. Every person you talked to, everything they told you about the Geth, the beacon, that ship, this second Turian –"

"Saren," Kaidan whispered, wondering if it was spelled like it sounded.

Anderson nearly jumped out of his skin. "What did you just say?" he snapped.

Kaidan blinked – _did I not mention the name before?_ "The, uh, the dockworker who saw Nihlus killed said that was the name he'd called the other Turian by – Saren."

"Saren…" Anderson repeated, his voice deathly soft. "You're sure?"

_Huh?_ "Yes," Kaidan nodded. "Sir –"

The captain stood suddenly. "I shouldn't keep you any longer, Lieutenant," he said firmly. "You've got a lot of work ahead of you." He glanced over at a display screen mounted on a nearby wall. "We're going to be in transit for several more hours. If Shepard recovers before we get to the –" Anderson brought himself up short, grimacing slightly – "Before we get where we're going, she'll sign off on it. If she hasn't, you'll do that. And you'll have to be the one to present it," he added.

"Understood, sir," Kaidan said crisply, his mind clicking through a tapestry of possibilities. _Where are we going? Who are we briefing? What the hell is going on around here?_ "I'll send you the draft as soon as I'm finished."

"Alright, Lieutenant," the captain said, standing. "That'll be all for now. Dismissed." Kaidan stood, saluted, and turned towards the door. "Alenko," the captain called out after him, "This report will end up in a lot of hands. Make it good."

* * *

Thirteen hours later, after consulting with Williams half a dozen times, downing a handful of stim pills to stave off the head-lolling, open-mouth snoring sleep that kept trying to envelop him, and writing, revising and rewriting again, Kaidan slumped back in his chair at his small desk in his quarters – _more like an end table _– and hit the 'Send' button transmitting the AAR to the captain. He copy furnished Williams – even though she couldn't access her email since her account was managed by the Ground Forces Command and the _Normandy_'s systems were run by the Special Forces Command – and to Shepard, though she was still unconscious in the med bay. _She'll want to see it as soon as she wakes up_, he reasoned.

He knew he needed some sleep after nearly twenty-four hours on his feet, but the image of the commander lying alone pulled him from the chair. His muscles protested against any movement after so much time seated, but gradually, groggily, he shuffled out of his quarters and towards the med bay.

"Lieutenant," Doctor Chakwas chimed pleasantly in her British accent as he came in, "How are you?"

"Fine," he said, catching sight of Shepard's red hair towards the back of the med bay. "How is she?"

The doctor turned back towards her patient. "Her vitals are normal, so she should be fine…as soon as she wakes up," she said cautiously.

Kaidan moved alongside the commander, looking down at the calm, restful expression on her face. "That's the trick, isn't it?" The harsh artificial light paled her skin even further than it was but caught the red highlights in her hair at the same time. _If only those eyes would open_, he sighed to himself – _such a bright, beautiful green…_

"Always is," Chakwas chuckled sadly, checking the display panel next to Shepard's bed. "Why don't you go rest up, Lieutenant – I'll let you know when she comes around."

"Okay," Kaidan nodded. Even the light-headed feeling that gazing at Shepard gave him wasn't easing the heavy ache in his muscles. He brushed the back of his hand along her arm, turning to go – but just as he pulled his hand away from Shepard her arm twitched. Kaidan whirled back around in time to see her take a sharp, deep breath, turning her head in his direction. "Doctor? Doctor Chakwas?" he called out. "I think she's waking up." Kaidan heard the doctor calling into the comm for the captain as Shepard moaned softly, her eyes flickering open. He backed away from the bed as the doctor came over. Shepard pulled her arms up to prop herself up on the bed, then swung her legs to one side, bringing herself all the way up into a sitting position on the bed.

"You had us worried there, Shepard," the doctor said gently, sweeping a scanner around the commander. "How are you feeling?"

Shepard blinked, her eyes slowly coming into focus as she started to look around the room. Kaidan could see her running through a checklist in her head – _Chakwas…on the Normandy…all limbs accounted for… _Her gaze shifted to him for a moment, then moved away just as quickly as she shook her head, briefly pressing a hand against her temple. "Like the morning after shore leave," she croaked. "How long have I been out?"

"About fifteen hours," Chakwas said, putting the scanner away. "Something happened down there with the beacon, I think."

Kaidan took half a step forward. "It's my fault," he blurted as her eyes shifted over to him. "I must have triggered some kind of security field when I approached it. You had to push me out of the way."

She looked away, her eyes unfocused. "You had no way to know what would happen," she said softly. A strange catch in her voice fluttered through his senses.

"Actually," the doctor sighed, "We don't know if that's what set it off. And unfortunately, we'll never get the chance to find out." Shepard frowned, glancing at Kaidan in confusion.

"The beacon exploded – a system overload, maybe," he explained. Shepard dropped her head into her hands, swearing underneath a deep sigh. "The blast was what knocked you cold."

Shepard lifted her head back up, looking around the room again. "Where's Williams?"

"She's down in the NCO quarters," Kaidan said. "She's fine."

"Good," Shepard breathed, gingerly beginning to slide herself off the bed. "Thanks for making sure I got back okay." The flutter returned to Kaidan's breath as the commander's boots hit the floor.

Doctor Chakwas came around from the other side of the bed. "Physically, you do seem to be fine," she said to Shepard. "But I have been seeing some unusual brain activity – abnormal beta waves – and an increase in your rapid eye movement, signs typically associated with intense dreaming."

Shepard's head jerked up to look at the doctor, a _how-did-you-know-that?_ gaze on her face. "When the beacon activated I saw...I'm not sure what I saw," she sighed, looking down at the floor and crossing her arms tightly across her chest. "Synthetics – maybe Geth. Destruction…death…lots of death." She closed her eyes for a long moment as if trying to put her memory on rewind. "Nothing's really clear," she finally shrugged, opening her eyes.

"I better add this to my report," the doctor said thoughtfully. "It may –" The med bay door slid open and Captain Anderson came striding through.

Kaidan and the doctor sprang to attention as the captain came in – Shepard pulled her shoulders back to make the same movement but stopped halfway, grimacing slightly. "How's our XO holding up, Doctor?" the captain asked.

"The readings look normal," Chakwas said, handing a datapad to the captain. "I'd say the Commander's going to be fine."

"Glad to hear it," the captain said, barely glancing at the datapad before setting it aside. "Shepard, I need to speak with you – in private."

The look he gave Kaidan and the doctor was unmissable. "Aye, aye, Captain," Kaidan said, saluting. "I'll be in the mess if you need me," he added, turning his head to direct his words more at the commander than at the captain. Shepard gave him a slight nod and a ghost of a smile as he turned to leave, the doctor following behind him. The warm flutters swept through him again, carrying him outside without his even realizing his feet were moving until the swish and click of the med bay doors closing reached his ears. He shuffled over towards the officers' mess, dropping into the same chair he'd occupied earlier with a sigh.

His wait wasn't nearly as long the second time – within fifteen minutes the doors slid back open to let first the captain and then the commander pass through into the hall. Anderson strode by without a word and hurried up the stairs to the command deck, taking the stairs two at a time from the sound of his boots against the deck. The doctor intercepted Shepard before she could take a step, asking her a few quick questions to be satisfied that her patient was fit. Kaidan rose as Shepard answered the doctor in a quiet, low voice, nodding repeatedly until Chakwas nodded in reply and moved off, slipping back into the med bay.

"Sit down," Shepard said as she approached the mess, waving off his salute and taking a seat across from him. "You alright?"

"Yeah," he said, sitting back down. "Fine. Just glad to see you're up and okay."

Shepard shook her head, frowning. "Up, yes. Okay…ask me later." She pinched her eyes closed, leaning all the way back in her chair.

"Losing Jenkins has been pretty hard on the crew," Kaidan said, watching her cautiously. "And no matter how many times you see it there's just something about dead civilians…" _And the monsters the Geth turned them into…_ "Doesn't seem right," he said quickly, trying to keep the images of those blackened, staggering figures out of his mind. "But it would've been worse if you hadn't stopped Saren and the Geth from wiping out the whole colony."

"We," she snapped, opening her eyes. "I wasn't the only one down there."

Kaidan flushed slightly. "Yeah, but –"

"Williams and I might've been in some serious trouble with that big Geth on the tram if it hadn't been for you," Shepard said tightly, a hint of anger creeping into her voice. "So don't make me make you take credit where credit is due, Lieutenant – I'm not in the mood."

"Aye aye, ma'am," he said, not sure whether to feel flattered or chastised. "It's been a hell of a shakedown cruise," he added, sighing and leaning back in his chair.

Shepard let out a sigh, closing her eyes again. "It's not over yet."

"Huh?" he said, leaning forward.

"You'll find out soon enough," she said, sticking a hand out at him. "You don't happen to have that AAR the captain told me about with you, do you?"

"Oh – yeah," he nodded, sliding his datapad out of its case on his utility belt and bringing the draft report up on screen. "Here you go." He wondered if he dared press her for details of her talk with Anderson any further, but she sank deeper into her chair, eyes locked on the datapad. _It's probably classified_, he thought, sitting back to wait. _Though that didn't stop her before –_

"Hey, L–T!" Williams voice rang out in the mess before she sprang out from behind the wall concealing the elevator to the lower decks. "Guess what! We just heard new coordinates being relayed to engineering and – oh, Commander! You're awake!" She brought herself up short, barely managing to get off a quick salute before having to grab onto a chair to keep her balance.

Shepard looked up from the datapad. "Chief," she nodded in response. Williams glanced from Shepard to Kaidan and then back again uncertainly. "You were saying something about new coordinates?"

"Uh, yeah," Williams said, bouncing on her heels. "They're for the Citadel!"

Kaidan sat up – _of course_. "We still have to take the beacon there – what's left of it," he said, wincing slightly as he glanced at Shepard for her reaction.

She frowned ruefully, giving the datapad one last look before laying it on the table. "There's more to it than just that," she sighed. "Take a seat, Chief – you're about to be in the middle of this, too." Williams quickly pulled out the chair she was already holding onto, dropping down and leaning forward excitedly. "This other Turian that we heard about, Saren…" Shepard drew in a long breath, pressing her hands together on the tabletop. "According to the captain, he's a Spectre too."

Williams' eyes doubled in size. "What?"

"One of the most experienced and trusted Spectres," Shepard muttered bitterly. "Captain Anderson hopes that our ambassador to the Citadel can get an audience with the Council to present the information we have implicating Saren in the attack. Hopefully," she said, sarcasm dripping thickly from her voice, "The Council will take action against Saren to prevent this from happening again." She laid a hand on the datapad, tapping one finger against the screen. "So we three are going to be chatting with our ambassador, and we may even find ourselves being questioned by the Citadel Council itself."

Kaidan found himself staring at the datapad, focusing on the soft glow of the screen reflecting against Shepard's pale skin. _'Make it good' the captain said…I hope she likes it._ "The Council isn't going to want to believe one of their own would do something like this," he said flatly. "They'll blame us for the destruction of the beacon and Nihlus' death, and probably demand more concessions from the Alliance in return."

"They probably will," Shepard sighed, frowning strangely.

"Attention all hands," Joker's voice rang out through the ship's comm, "Secure for relay." Kaidan braced himself against the table as the ship jerked through the familiar push-pull of mass relay travel.

Williams grinned. "Are we there?"

"Probably," Shepard said, picking up the datapad. "The viewports up in the helm will have a pretty spectacular view as we approach – why don't you two go have a look?"

"Aye aye, ma'am," Williams chirped, jumping out of her chair and giving Shepard a quick salute before hurrying over to the stairs.

Kaidan pushed back from the table slowly. "Do you have everything you need, Commander?"

"I think so," she said, her eyes on the datapad's screen. "Go on – I'll be up after I'm finished with the report."

He stood and turned to leave, but stopped, remembering the one thing he'd left out of the report. "Commander – you said the beacon was only part of the reason Nihlus was with us," he said softly.

"I was hoping you'd forgotten that," she muttered.

"Would you have bothered more than five minutes with me if I was the sort of officer who did?" he heard himself ask her in reply.  
The edges of her lips twitched into an echo of a smile. "No." Kaidan sat back down as she exhaled slowly, wrapping both hands around the datapad. "Nihlus nominated me for the Spectres," she said quietly. "His other mission with us was to observe my performance in combat and make a final recommendation to the Council."

"Commander…" Kaidan breathed, a chill settling on his skin.

"I'm sure that's all shot to hell now," she shrugged, letting the datapad drop onto the table.

He shook his head, trying to imagine the feeling of having such a tantalizing opportunity laid out before you only to be, seemingly, ripped into shreds. "I – I'm sorry," he said quietly.

"If it's not meant to be I'm not going to lose any sleep over it," she sighed, her voice studiously smooth. "It would've been…interesting, but I didn't join the Alliance to be a hero, so…" Her voice trailed off as she gazed with unfocused eyes at the datapad.

"Why did you join?" Kaidan asked her softly.

Shepard's lips flattened into a thin, tight line, her eyes narrowing but not looking up at him. "To get away from where I was," she replied evenly. "You?"

"Well, biotics aren't restricted, but we sure as hell don't go undocumented," he muttered bitterly. "Officially we can do anything we want, but we still make a lot of people uncomfortable. It can be hard to hold down any job, let alone have any kind of career. "

"Except in the military," Shepard said.

Kaidan nodded. "Might as well get a paycheck for being what I am. And I don't have to worry that my boss thinks I'm a freak and plans to fire me as soon as I give him an excuse." Shepard let out a sympathetic grunt, leaning back in her chair. "Plus, my father served – it made him proud when I joined." _Eventually…_ He shook the echoes of his father's voice away, focusing his gaze back on the commander. "How about your parents?" he asked her, forcing a happier tone into his voice. "They must be proud of everything you've accomplished."

"I never knew my parents," Shepard said tightly. "If either one of them was still alive and gave a damn about me they could've looked me up after the Blitz on Elysium, when my face was plastered on every vidscreen from here to the Terminus Systems. Nobody called."

"Oh." _Ouch._ "Sorry."

"Don't be," Shepard sighed, her voice evening out as she picked the datapad back up off the table. "Go on and head up, have a look, then make sure you change into your SDU – check with the supply officer to see if he's got a spare in Williams' size. We'll probably be on the move as soon as we dock."

He pushed himself up out of his chair, stretching his still-sore muscles as he stood. "You sure you don't want to come along, Commander?" he asked as she dropped her gaze back onto the datapad.

"No, thank you, Lieutenant," she said. "I've seen it before." Nodding, he turned towards the stairs. "Alenko –" she called out quietly. He pivoted back around in time to see her eyes glance up at him for a split second before resuming their contemplation of his report. "This is good."

"Th-Thank you, ma'am," Kaidan said, choking the words out past the breath that momentarily refused to move. Turning, he allowed himself a small smile as he started up the stairs.

* * *

A stern-faced older man flanked by two younger officers was already waiting for the _Normandy_ as it was secured alongside the docking platform, locking into the magnetic grapples with a series of shudders and thumps. Captain Anderson led Shepard, Alenko, and Williams outside, stopping just short of the man and drawing himself up into a crisp salute. The other three did the same, Kaidan's eyes sliding from the deep lines on the central man's face to the three stars glittering on both sides of his collar, then to the unit patch on his left shoulder – five stars surrounding a monochrome image of the Citadel's five ward arms and connecting central ring. "Admiral Hackett, sir," the captain said as the admiral quickly returned the salute, "It's good to see you again."

"Likewise, Captain," the admiral said, stepping forward to shake Anderson's hand. "Though the circumstances could be better. This is Commander Shepard, I presume?" he asked, turning his attention to the red-haired woman half a step behind the captain.

"Yes, sir," Anderson said as Shepard moved to stand next to him, "Along with the rest of the ground team from Eden Prime. Commander – Lieutenant Alenko – Gunnery Chief Williams - may I introduce Admiral Steven Hackett, Commander, Alliance Navy Fifth Fleet."

Hackett nodded at each of them in greeting, then turned back to the captain. "Ambassador Udina is waiting for us in his office," he said, gesturing towards a large door at the end of the platform. Anderson nodded and fell in step next to Hackett as they began to walk, Shepard and the others falling in behind. "The Systems and Materials Development Command is eager to go over the Normandy and see how it performed during your mission," Hackett added as they approached the door.

"They can plug in and download all the data they like," Anderson replied.

"Actually, they'd like to come on board to run some diagnostics, maybe even take a few systems apart," Hackett said, frowning slightly. "We'll have to clear your crew from the ship for a day or two – we have a swing space in our headquarters that we can use as a temporary barracks."

Anderson sighed as the door opened into a large, brightly lit elevator. "I don't suppose there's any way to say no and still manage to keep the oversight committee happy, is there?"

"No," the admiral said, leading the group into the elevator. "They're twitchy enough over what happened on Eden Prime. If we can at least show them that the _Normandy_ performed up to expectations they'll calm down a bit." One of the officers accompanying Admiral Hackett pressed a button on the wall, sending the door sliding back down. The lights changed color and some soft, generically peppy music started to play as the elevator began to move.

They descended in silence for a few minutes, Shepard holding a parade-ground-perfect pose while the senior officers leaned against the walls and their aides fidgeted nervously nearby. Williams made no attempt to hide her curiosity, leaning as far up against the glass wall of the elevator as an at-ease stance allowed. Kaidan, who'd only passed through Citadel space once before but hadn't made it onto the station itself, tried to follow a middle path, staying at attention but allowing himself to crane his neck for a longer look at something brightly colored or strangely shaped. After passing several blurry series of floors the elevator entered a large atrium filled with Alliance personnel and security officers of several different species clad in similar blue uniforms – _they must be Citadel Security_, Kaidan thought as the elevator began to slow.

"Hell of a coincidence, isn't it?" Admiral Hackett said softly into the silence. Kaidan glanced over to see the admiral looking sidelong at Captain Anderson as he spoke, a grim tightness in his voice. The textbook stillness of Shepard's posture wavered as her eyes darted from the admiral to the captain, narrowing with each second that passed without a response from Anderson. A slight, cushioned bump and a muffled chime announced their arrival, and by the time the door slid open the commander's poker face was back in place.

Word of the _Normandy_'s arrival had apparently preceded them – a gaggle of reporters pounced on the group as soon as they passed out of the Fifth Fleet's secure facility and into the public areas of the Presidium, the central area of the Citadel and home to most governmental and military operations. Most were human but there was a noticeable helping of Salarians and Asari, all shouting questions at Shepard. "Is it true that the Geth are responsible for the attack on Eden Prime?" "Can you tell us anything about the unknown ship reported to have been at the center of the attack?" "Do you feel the destruction of the beacon ends any chance you had to become a Spectre?" Shepard didn't react, even to the last question, but Anderson did, picking up his pace and taking the commander by the arm, steering her into the shadow of the line of Alliance and C-Sec guards who were shoving the press back with a ferocity worthy of a rugby scrum. A single push by the line of guards moved the closest reporters aside, clearing the path for the group to slip behind their perimeter and pass through a set of doors crowned by the seal of the Alliance.

"That was fun," Williams snorted, glancing up at the security camera feed of the crowd surrounding the door they'd just passed through.

Anderson turned on the admiral, anger darkening his eyes. "How did they know about that? About the beacon? About her?" he hissed.

"Word must've leaked," Hackett said tightly. "But I guarantee you it wasn't from us."

"Saren," the captain snarled, looking away. "Wants to embarrass humanity, make us look incompetent – see what sort of a person we put up for the Spectres," he continued bitterly, a darker expression settling into the lines of his face. "Can't even complete a simple mission without getting a bunch of civilians killed and the object of the mission destroyed."

A muscle in Shepard's cheek twitched angrily, but it was the admiral who stepped closer to the captain. "David –"

"Captain Anderson," a low, accented voice cut in. "I see you brought half your crew with you." An older, medium-skinned man clad in a bright white civilian suit of noticeably expensive material approached – the Ambassador.

"Just the ground team from Eden Prime," Anderson replied evenly. "In case you had any questions."

Udina sniffed. "I have the mission reports. I assume they're accurate?"

"They are," the captain said confidently. "Has the Council agreed to give us an audience?"

"They have – can't say when exactly, perhaps two or three days," Udina grunted, nodding. "They were not happy about it. Saren's their top agent – has been for decades. They don't like him being accused of treason." He turned, waving them into the embassy's main reception area.

"The dead of Eden Prime are liking it even less," Shepard muttered sharply.

Udina stopped short, looking back toward Shepard. "Settle down, Commander," he snapped, glaring at her. "You're already done more than enough to jeopardize your candidacy for the Specters. The mission on Eden Prime was a chance to prove you could get the job done," he continued, taking a step in her direction as his voice rose. "Instead, Nihlus ended up dead and the beacon was destroyed!"

"That's Saren's fault, not hers!" Anderson snarled.

"I finished the job that was given to me," Shepard intoned, crossing her arms over her chest as a slight redness colored her face. "Relieve the colony and secure the beacon. We neutralized the enemy and got to the beacon, but it was probably fitted with an explosive device on a timer or a proximity sensor before the Geth left to ensure it would not be recovered in one piece." She stepped closer to the ambassador, her eyes narrowing. "Saren and the Geth had inside intel we didn't have," she rasped. "This mission was spiked from the start."

Udina also flushed, but swallowed and took a deep breath. "The Geth involvement has been confirmed," he said slowly, "But we can expect any charges against Saren to be contested vigorously. So we'd better hope the C-Sec investigation turns up evidence to support our accusations." His voice took on a low, almost threatening tone as he glanced over at Anderson before resettling his glare on Shepard. "Otherwise the Council might use this as an excuse to keep you out of the Specters." The commander glared back silently at Udina until he blinked and whirled away from her. "Come with me Captain, Admiral," he said curtly, "I want to go over a few things. Shepard – you and the others can meet us at the Citadel tower for the hearing, whenever it gets scheduled. Top level. I'll make sure you have clearance to get in." Turning his back on Shepard he marched into the reception room, the admiral and his aides following in his wake.

Shepard clenched her jaw and snapped into a sharp salute. "Sir," she said tightly, her voice calm in spite of the flush spreading across her pale features. Anderson hesitated and seemed about to say something to the commander, but she quickly spun around on her heel and stalked towards the main door. Kaidan and Williams both gave the captain a salute and a _Sorry…_ shrug before hurrying out behind her.

She was already outside the perimeter of guards when they came out of the embassy, shoving her way through the reporters as firmly as possible without dropping anyone onto the floor. Kaidan rushed a few steps ahead, turning cameras and recorders aside until he got in front of Shepard, blocking the reporters from seeing or reaching out at her for the last few dozen meters between them and the safety of Fifth Fleet Headquarters. As they passed through the doors her pace slowed only as long as it took to wave her ID card through the scanner, stalking through the security gates with barely a nod at the stunned guards. She continued past clusters of other military and civilian personnel, drawn out by their initial arrival, ignoring their slack-jawed stares and half-salutes, charging through the atrium and into the elevator that led back to the docking platform. Kaidan and Williams had to break into a sprint to slip in behind her as the door began to close.

Shepard was leaning heavily on the railing, her forehead touching the elevator wall as it began to rise. She hadn't turned around to see if anyone had followed her, though as Kaidan approached her slowly he figured she must've heard their footsteps. He cleared his throat – her head twitched once in his direction, but did not turn. "You alright, Commander?" he asked tentatively.

"Oh, I'm fine," she snarled, glaring down at the rapidly receding atrium. "We're all screwed, but nobody needs to be worrying about me."

Williams shook her head. "Doesn't sound like the Council is going to care much about Saren and the Geth nearly wiping out an entire human colony," she said bitterly. "No offense, Commander, but I don't think we shouldn't bother trying to get you or anybody else in the Spectres – we need to look to ourselves to protect our own people."

"It's not…" Shepard sighed frustratedly, turning around and leaning back against the elevator wall. "This isn't about humanity. A Spectre going rogue and working with the Geth to attack a colony of innocent civilians and murder a fellow Spectre should be alarming whether it was a human colony or a Salarian colony – hell, even a Batarian colony." Williams snorted disbelievingly. "Saren didn't go to Eden Prime for kicks – you don't get to be the Council's top agent by being that reckless," Shepard snapped in reply, crossing her arms tightly across her chest. "He was there for the beacon."

The lines of the picture the commander was drawing began to take shape in Kaidan's mind. "Getting the beacon must've been pretty important for Saren to risk revealing his association with the Geth," he said, nodding slowly.

"Exactly," Shepard intoned, nodding vigorously. "Connecting Saren to the Geth is important, but we really need to be focusing on what they were focused on – that beacon." Williams also folded her arms across her chest, frowning but following the commander's words with growing interest. "That's what they came to Eden Prime for – so the question we need to be asking is 'Why?' What were they looking for? Is there something in this jumble in my head makes sense to them – is valuable to them?" She dropped her chin and closed her eyes, wincing slightly.

_The vision_. Kaidan shuffled half a step closer to her. She hadn't said anything about her interaction with the beacon since that one moment in the medbay. "What *did* you see?" he asked softly.

Shepard let out a long breath, squeezing her eyes a little tighter. "Fragments," she breathed, shaking her head while reaching down to slide her datapad out of its holster on her belt. "Here – I added onto the end of the AAR while we were coming into dock. I can't make heads or tails of it, but every instinct I have is telling me I should be terrified," she finished, her voice quiet and cold.

That chill settled in the air around them, numbing Kaidan's fingers as he reached for the datapad. "Of what?"

"Your guess is as good as mine," she shrugged.

Williams came alongside Kaidan as he tore his gaze away from Shepard and began to read. _Each image was a brief flash – seemingly a fragment of a larger sequence that did not come through clearly, either due to the degradation of the file or the beacon over time or some other unknown alien incompatibility. The last and most defined image was of a bipedal, humanoid figure not of any known alien species (presumably Prothean, given the beacon's origin), reaching towards the sky. Other images ranged from an unknown cityscape to the prying apart of an organic being to allow the implantation of -_ "Ew," Williams said under her breath.

Shepard let out half a laugh. "Yeah, I'm glad I didn't catch more of that part."

Kaidan skimmed quickly to the end of the summary – more images of the unknown aliens, more cityscapes, more mechanical implants inside organics. He looked up at Williams, who was frowning over the last paragraph herself, then at Shepard, who had opened her eyes and was gazing vacantly at the floor. "I don't get it," he shrugged.

"Me neither," the commander admitted with a sigh, dragging her eyes upwards and straightening her posture as the elevator chimed its imminent arrival at the docking platform. "Maybe that's why it bothers me so much," she said softly.

"Or maybe it's some Prothean voodoo from the beacon," Williams said. Kaidan tossed the chief a skeptical glare while handing the datapad back to Shepard. "We don't really know that much about them, do we?" she argued, shrugging off Kaidan's stare and turning towards the commander. "They could've been their time's version of the Asari – or the Batarians – or somewhere in between."

Shepard nodded thoughtfully as the doors lit up and began to open. "Empires don't usually get built with 'please' and 'thank you', that's for sure," she muttered, squinting at the crowded platform next to the _Normandy_. Dozens of Alliance personnel with DEVCOM badges on their shoulders were carrying crates onto the ship, squeezing past the steady trickle of the _Normandy_'s crew carrying a shore leave's worth of gear off the ship. They were congregating around Lieutenant Commander Pressley off to one side of the elevator, where a toe-tapping and frowning doctor stood next to a bemused Joker, reclining against a row of crates with his legs safely locked into their braces. "Lieutenant Commander!" Shepard called out, her shoulders locking back into a steady, confident pose as soon as she stepped out onto the platform. "Status?"

"DEVCOM wants us all off the ship within the hour," Pressley muttered, saluting her as she came closer. "That way they can pry the _Normandy_ apart, poke around inside and then slap her back together without any adult supervision."

"They're some of the best engineers and technicians in the Alliance," Shepard replied evenly.

Pressley let out a frustrated sigh. "I know – I just..."

"We'll make sure we schedule some extra time to run diagnostics before we leave," Shepard continued, beginning to walk slowly towards the _Normandy_, waving Pressley to follow her as Kaidan and Williams stayed a few steps behind. "Just in case someone left a hydrospanner in the middle of the drive core's power regulator." Pressley chuckled, nodding, as they reached the gangway. "The captain won't be back with us for a while, so while we go grab our gear I need you to make sure the crew is all accounted for and that they all have everything they might need for the next several days."

"Yes ma'am," he replied crisply, saluting her as they halted in front of the airlock. "This does strike me as the sort of place where a single pair of socks would cost me a week's salary."

"Close to it," Shepard chuckled. "I'll be back up in a few minutes," she added, stepping to one side so Kaidan and Williams could pass by to board the ship. "The sooner we clear out the sooner DEVCOM can get to work – and the sooner they'll be finished and we'll be out of here."

* * *

After gathering their gear – then meeting up with the crew – then shrugging off the attempts of the local public affairs officer to interview the three heroes of Eden Prime – then managing to cram themselves into the smaller-than-imagined makeshift barracks – Kaidan finally got to stretch himself out on a mattress, a pillow cradled under his still lightly throbbing head. It was a thin mattress to be sure, through which he could feel just about every coil in the metal frame of the portable bunkbed whose lower level he occupied, but it was a mattress nonetheless. He could hear Shepard's voice echoing throughout the room as he lay down, directing a grumbling Joker to the bed closest to the door, gently ordering an ensign this way and a corporal that…

_Long, bony fingers stretched out, arching as they moved to seize their prey. He tried to look up, to see the attacker and the target, but a bright light shining down on them all shadowed and shielded both from his view. A scream ripped through his mind without making a sound, neither human nor synthetic – the hand closed its grip – the struggling figure of a woman took shape amidst the white-yellow fog. She looked up at her attacker – she opened her eyes – _

He jerked awake, his head smacking against the metal frame of the bed above him. "Ow!" he barked, as the occupant of the upper bunk snorted and rolled over in sleepy indignance.

Kaidan took a few deep breaths to calm his racing heart and rubbed his eyes, trying to focus on the dark room through the burning brightness still lingering from the dream. _Converted briefing room – HQ – Citadel – right_, he nodded to himself. A few sharp slivers of light were leaking in from underneath the lone set of doors, reflecting off of the braces propped up against the edge of Joker's bed and the silvery hair of the doctor off in a far corner. His junior officers were snoring peacefully in the bunk to his left – their usual companions from engineering were in the bunks to their right. There was no sign of Captain Anderson, nor of Shepard. Sitting up, he scanned the room for the commander's familiar silhouette or the flash of color her hair would give off even in the low light. After a few moments he spotted her gear, stacked neatly next to a vacant lower bunk near the door.

He slipped out of his bed as quietly as he could, cringing at each creak and squeak. Still wearing his fatigues – only a handful of the crew had been either daring or unconcerned enough to get down to their skivvies, and Kaidan was quickly learning that he was neither with Shepard around – he tiptoed towards the door.

The swing space opened up into a conference room, fitted out with a large, polished metal table and a dozen oversized chairs. Shepard was sitting in a chair near the middle of the table, her feet propped up on the next chair and her chin resting in the palm of her hand. A vid screen mounted on the wall across from her was showing a football match, its volume turned down to nearly nothing, but the commander was staring down at the datapad she held in her free hand. He approached her slowly, knowing from the twitch in her shoulders that she'd heard the door open. When he was just one chair away from her he stopped, clearing his throat – "Hey," he said softly.

She half-turned her head, her eyes glancing up to see him before dropping back down. "Hey."

He leaned against the back of the nearest chair. "Couldn't sleep?"

"I fell asleep fine," she sighed, laying her datapad down on the table. "Staying asleep proved more difficult."

"Yeah," he breathed, sitting down. _It's been years since I've had a dream like that…_ "Is that live?" he asked, turning and gesturing at the match on the vid screen.

Shepard nodded. "Champions League match – Beijing Guoan against Olympique de Marseille."

Kaidan glanced up at the screen – nil-nil, in the 60th minute. "Nobody can get anything past Marseille's keeper, can they?"

"Nope – and Beijing's had some good looks," Shepard said, leaning back in her chair and letting a relaxed half-smile light up her features. "Marseille would be up two goals but they were whistled offside both times."

"Ouch," Kaidan murmured, wondering how she could seem to be so absorbed in her datapad and yet not have missed any key plays in the match. "Where's the captain?" he asked lightly.

Shepard's posture tightened slightly. "He actually rents a small studio apartment here on the Citadel – has for years, ever since his first posting with the Fifth," she said evenly. "He decided if he stayed there it'd be easier for him to be at the admiral's or the ambassador's beck and call without disturbing the rest of us." Her words sounded like she'd been repeating them in her head so that when they came out they would sound convincing to her own ears as well as to everyone else's. "We'll see him at the Council's hearing tomorrow."

"Tomorrow?" Kaidan asked, surprised. "I thought the ambassador said it might be a few days."

"A spot on the Council's calendar suddenly became available," Shepard said lightly. "Coincidentally, word of Saren's alleged involvement in the Eden Prime attack had flashed across the nets just a half-an-hour earlier."

The gratified smirk in her voice made Kaidan's skin prickle. "Commander…"

"Wasn't me," she said quickly, shaking her head but still grinning. "I don't play the media game well enough to even try to pull of something like that – I'd get caught." The skeptical frown Kaidan couldn't keep off his face drew a sigh out of her. "Someone like the ambassador…or the captain," she added, "Would've had a lot more practice."

"Oh." The memory of Anderson's sudden mood swing when Kaidan had mentioned Saren's name floated through his mind. "Is it just me, Commander," he started slowly, "Or does the captain seem a bit distracted every time Saren's name comes up?"

Shepard's face pulled into a tight, _I-must-not-criticize-my-CO_ expression. "Why would you say that?" she asked.

"Well…when I first told him the name we'd been given for the other Turian he looked ready to turn the _Normandy_ around and head out looking for him," Kaidan started, watching Shepard's reaction – or more precisely, lack thereof – with care. "And then today in the embassy he seemed really angry." Shepard directed her gaze at the vidscreen. "Angry enough to risk a court-martial by leaking classified information to the media."

"Mmm," the commander grunted, tapping a single finger on the table. "He told me they worked together on a mission about twenty years ago," she said briskly, "A mission that ended badly." She sat back up in her chair, reaching for her datapad. "He didn't give me any details, but I think he thinks Saren got away with something dirty back then." She punched at the datapad's screen, frowning.

_Something that still bothers him_, Kaidan thought, nodding. "And he wants to make sure it doesn't happen again. I guess –"

The door slid open again, letting a sleepy-eyed Williams shuffle into the conference room. "So this is where you two have gone," she mumbled, rubbing her eyes.

"Chief," Shepard said, putting her datapad back down. "You okay?"

"Yeah," Williams sighed, dropping into the nearest chair. "Just…nightmare," she finished sadly.

Shepard nodded understandingly. "You did get through to your family, didn't you?" she asked quickly. "That j.g. said he would get you a relay."

"I did," the chief replied, smiling sadly. "Mom said she hadn't really been worried, but I could tell she was lying." A small, quick smile flashed across the commander's face in reply. "She, uh, did ask me what they're going to do with me now that I don't have a unit anymore," Williams continued slowly.

"Nothing's official yet," Shepard shrugged. "It'll probably depend on what sort of orders the _Normandy_'s given next. If we're given…special orders, I intend to see you're along for the ride." She tapped a finger heavily against the screen of her datapad. "If we're folded into the 63rd Scout Flotilla according to the original plan, PERSCOM will send you home for some R&R and then slot you into the next posting that becomes available within your command."

Williams shook her head. "So I can spend the next two years of my life eating dirt on some half-baked colony world? Nothing against garrison duty, Commander," she amended, "But I'd much rather stay with the _Normandy_."

"So would I," Shepard nodded. "Hopefully –" A burst of noise from the vid screen caused all three of them to stop and look – Marseille's players were jumping around on the pitch, celebrating. "Damnit," Shepard sighed.

"Beijing fan?" Williams asked.

"No," Shepard grumbled. "I have a hundred-credit bet on this match with Genvieve – Admiral Dumont," she added, glancing from Kaidan to Williams. "It's been a good bet for me the last couple of years, but ever since Marseille signed that keeper…" She stood slowly, shaking her head and stretching. "I need a drink. You guys game?"

Kaidan blinked. "Ma'am?"

"It's –" Shepard glanced down at her datapad, her face twisting into a sudden scowl. "Not late enough," she continued. "And I'm still trying to wrap my brain around the idea of facing the Citadel Council itself at 0900."

"0900?" Williams exclaimed. "Tomorrow!" Shepard nodded. "I've got my card on me," the chief said, standing. "Let's go."

The commander smiled, turning expectantly to Kaidan. "Uh…" The fraternization regs in the Alliance forces were a bit loose – months, even years spent away from home, coupled with nearly constant combat and the always constant turmoil of being a junior species in the wider galaxy required humans being able to rely on each other for friendship and support, regardless of rank. Nobody would have a problem with a senior officer, a junior officer, and an enlisted NCO being out and about – but she was *the* Commander Shepard, and Eden Prime was probably the lead story on every news vid between Earth and the Traverse –

"Lieutenant?"

Shepard's soft inquiry broke through his thoughts, her hopeful smile washing all other things away. His hand dropped to his pockets – his card was still there. "Okay," he said slowly. "There was a place near the embassy – should be safe, if it's open."

"This is the Citadel," Shepard grinned. "Nothing ever closes."

* * *

Shepard took one look inside the lounge and shook her head. "Oh, no," she said, turning around. "Not here."

"Why?" Kaidan asked, confused. It was well-lit, clean, and filled with an assortment of respectable-looking humans and aliens. "This place looks fine."

"For a graveyard," Shepard grunted, heading back into the hall. "Let's go find someplace with a pulse." Williams nodded once and followed – Kaidan shrugged, but turned and fell in behind them.

The constant coming and going of ships and the need to interface around the clock with dozens of governments on hundreds of systems kept the Citadel buzzing no matter the time. The Presidium was only about a third as full as it had been during their visit to the Embassy earlier – small groups of more than half a dozen different species, mostly keeping to their own kind. _And no sign of any reporters_, he noted happily – no doubt word of Shepard's sortie would draw them out, but at least for now they could get around in peace. The thin crowds also allowed Kaidan to get his first good look at the place, sweeping his gaze back and forth along the gently curving open space of the central ring. Shallow pools and fountains filled the central space, dotted with towering statues and monuments of varying species and ages and crisscrossed by gracefully arching walkways. Gazing up towards the concave roof he didn't see any stars but a digital mural of clouds and a bright blue sky. The low hum of all the softly lit signs indicating the various sections of the Presidium combined with the rhythm of the fountains and the ebb of conversations to create a constant, pleasant echo in the back of his mind.

Passing through the main atrium at a quick pace and without a single glance at the scenery, Shepard led them to a large kiosk next to an open track. "Any ideas, you two?" she asked, punching a few buttons on the kiosk's main panel.

"That j.g. who set up my comm relay was talking about some new club that just opened down in one of the wards – Flux, he said," Williams shrugged. "Drink prices weren't too bad and the music was good."

"Alright," Shepard said, her fingers working the panel for a few more seconds before it lit up and let out a long, bright note. A small tram appeared out of a tunnel at the far end of the atrium, gliding silently on the track towards them. When it reached the kiosk it slowed and stopped, its doors opening into an empty but brightly lit car with seats lining its walls and hand rails crisscrossing the ceiling. Stepping inside, a pleasant female voice began speaking in Asari – Kaidan didn't need his universal translator to recognize "Caution: doors closing" when he heard it.

Williams quickly dropped down into a seat near the front, twisting her neck left and right as the tram began to move. "Have you been here before, Commander?" she asked over her shoulder.

"Once," Shepard nodded, wrapping one arm around a standing pole. "But I barely made it off my ship, let alone go outside the fence and see the station – have a drink, do some shopping, be a tourist."

"We probably won't have that chance this time, either," Kaidan grumbled. "As soon as the Council's done with us and DEVCOM's done with the _Normandy_ we'll be right back out there."

"Well, if we're out there on the trail of Saren and the Geth I say the tour can wait," Williams said darkly, gripping the railing tightly enough to turn her knuckles white. "It'll be payback time."

"We'll see what the Council says tomorrow, Williams," Shepard said gently, moving closer to the door as a chime sounded their arrival at their destination. "Everything in its time."

Williams opened her mouth, eyes flashing her disagreement, but pulled herself back as the doors began to open. "Aye aye, ma'am," she muttered tightly. Kaidan and Shepard traded _keep-an-eye-on-her_ looks before following Williams out of the tram.

They could hear the thumping music from the club as soon as they stepped into the hall. Neon lights beckoned from the top of a wide stairway at the end of the hall, flanked by the shadowy outlines of human and Krogan bouncers just inside. A handful of Alliance marines in civilian clothes who were helping each other stumble towards the tram gaped at Shepard as she passed them and started up the stairs – _the haircuts are always a dead giveaway_, Kaidan chuckled silently.

The club was crowded, the open lower level filled with dancers and drinkers of all species. A loft-style upper floor, stuffed with rows of what looked like automated quasar machines and the credit-popping gamblers who loved them topped a long, low bar in the back right-hand corner of the club. _Good crowd, even this late – visible security – drinks and dancing and gambling when you need a break –_

"Not bad," Shepard said approvingly, sweeping her gaze from the wall of windows overlooking other parts of the ward to the bar and the upper level. "Let's see if they know how to pour a drink."

They moved slowly through the crowd, taking care to avoid the oblivious dancers and the tipsy drinkers. A handful of people did give them the whiplash-inducing double-take that Kaidan had seen following in Shepard's wake before, but most just instinctively shifted aside without looking. As they closed in on the bar Kaidan spotted a table full of young Marines scrambling up excitedly from their chairs, grabbing at their datapads – he took a step to his left, planting himself firmly in the way of any picture they might try to take of the commander. The one closest to Kaidan scowled and seemed about to argue, but recognizing a 'Sit down and shut up' look when he saw one the young man just started muttering to himself as he dropped back into his seat.

Stepping up to the bar, Shepard leaned over onto the edge of the counter, nonchalantly twirling a credit chip in her fingers as she looked for a bartender. "Music's alright," she observed, glancing over at the dance floor to their right. "A bit too electronica for me, but it'll do." She nodded at Williams as the other woman joined her at the rail. "Good call, Chief."

"Thank you, ma'am," Williams beamed. "What'll it take to get you out there?" she asked, waving her hand at the dancers.

Shepard laughed and shook her head vigorously. "I don't dance." Turning back towards Alenko she suddenly stopped, her eyes drawn to the reflective wall backing the bar. "Lieutenant," she sighed, "What percentage of people in this club appear to be staring at me?"  
Kaidan's sigh echoed the commander's as he leaned back casually, sweeping his eyes over the crowd before shifting back towards the bar. "I'd say about sixty," he said quietly. "Add in the ones who are staring at the Chief and I, wondering who we are to be out with you, and it goes up to seventy-five."

"Can't take you anywhere, Commander," Williams chuckled.

Shepard shook her head as the bartender, a particularly portly Volus in a pressure suit that looked like it hadn't been cleaned in years shuffled over towards her. "Can you recommend a place where I can get a decent drink in a clean glass and be left alone?" she asked, flipping the credit chip between her fingers with a practiced ease.

The Volus shifted side to side, the metallic eyelids of his mask clicking up and down. "I normally wouldn't steer anyone towards Chora's Den," he wheezed, "But its' clients do know how to keep to themselves. I wouldn't order the food, though, if I were you."

"Thanks," Shepard nodded, flicking the credit chip onto the counter in front of the Volus. Turning away, she gave Kaidan and Williams quick glances. "Let's move it, marines." The rising buzz of conversation dimmed as she moved towards the exit, silence falling upon those she passed and resuming only slowly and softly after all the shifting crowd had closed behind the three of them.

Kaidan let out a breath he hadn't known he was holding once they emerged into the bright fluorescence of the hall, skipping quickly down the stairs and away from the lingering gazes of the clubgoers. "You know where this place is, Commander?" he murmured.

"Oh yes," she nodded. "When I came here on the carrier _Olympus_ it had a prominent place in the XO's liberty briefing – in the 'Don't go there, and if you do go there don't get caught' section." She broke out into a grin as they passed by the transit station and started down a second, larger flight of stairs. "Of course, telling the entire crew not to go there ensured every single one of us was going to try," she chuckled, shaking her head.

"What happened?" Williams asked.

"First night in port a group of our marines – not from my squadron," she amended, "And a group of our fighter pilots had a few dozen drinks too many and got into a fight over which of them had requested the services of the best dancer in the place first."

Kaidan gulped. "Is it a…strip club?"

Williams laughed at the worried look on his face, but Shepard just softened her smile and shook her head. "Not the sort that most humans would expect," she said cautiously. "Scantily-clad dancers, yes. Champagne Room, no." Kaidan nodded nervously in reply as the stairs led them down into a large, open area filled with dozens of humans and aliens. Signs on the walls in the Asari language indicated a medical clinic and C-Sec facility to their left, and a market area to their right. "At least that's what I'm told – I wasn't there."

"No?" Williams and Kaidan asked in unison – she with disappointment, he with pleasant surprise.

"I'd already made plans to meet a friend who was stationed here with the Fifth for dinner at the O-Club," she sighed, moving slowly into the crowd. "I was going to make my run the next night. But after C-Sec marched a dozen of our crew back to the Alliance facility's gates in cuffs, the captain locked down the ship – no one could leave without his permission." Just like the Presidium above, the humans and aliens in the semi-crowded corridor took little notice of them, either staying in their conversations or barely altering their path as they hurried by. "He'd have kept us there until our next cruise if he'd had his way," Shepard continued, "But two days later the techs found a major problem in our hydraulics. The ship went into spacedock for repairs and everybody got a week's shore leave – on condition that we spent it somewhere else."

The star chart for the local sector floated just behind Kaidan's eyes. "There's not much in the systems around here," he muttered. "Where'd you go?"

"I brought up the list of the next half-dozen hops a j.g. like me could get a seat on, closed my eyes and pointed," Shepard said flatly. "I landed on Elysium."

Williams' jaw froze halfway through the process of opening, the humorous remark she'd been preparing dying on her lips. "Oh," she managed, giving the lieutenant a _How-was-I-supposed-to-know-where-that-was-going?_ shrug.

"Yeah," Shepard sighed, stepping carefully down into a sunken alcove, "That trip didn't go according to plan." Williams brought her head around in time to navigate the sudden drop safely, but Kaidan, his eyes locked on the commander, moved too late and stumbled, his knees buckling as the floor beneath them vanished. He flung his arms out to break his fall –

A hand suddenly seized his left arm by the elbow, spinning him around until a second hand took hold of his right arm. One single, swift tug brought him back to his feet, leaving him blinking and breathless as Shepard's bright green eyes stared into his. For a long moment she seemed about to say something to him, a hint of uncertainty flickering through her eyes.

"Hey L-T!" Kaidan's head snapped around towards the sound of Williams' voice. "Check this out!" A strange mixture of relief and regret seemed to flash across the commander's face before she, too, turned towards the chief with an expression as calm and unaffected as usual.

The far end of the sunken alcove Shepard had led them into ended in a floor-to-ceiling picture window, stretching along the entire length of the corridor and looking directly out into the center of the Citadel. The full expanse of the station's five ward arms stretched out for miles before them, dozens of glittering towers reaching into the vacuum as hundreds of shuttles buzzed around, their small lights blurring the edges of Kaidan's view. Wispy tendrils of the sunset-tinged nebula that surrounded the station colored the entire vista, their color growing darker in the distance. "Big place," he breathed, walking slowly towards the windows and feeling shorter with every step.

Williams came up on his right side, a smirk only half-erasing the look of awe on Williams' face. "That your professional opinion, sir?"

"This isn't a station," Shepard said, moving closer on Williams' other side but still several feet behind – her voice calm but her eyes wide. "It's a city."

"There must be millions here," Kaidan added, leaning over the low wall at the edge of the alcove. Shuttles of all shapes and sizes buzzed through the space between them and the windows. "It can't be possible to track of everyone coming and going." A shuttle bearing the C-Sec arms…a large, sleek one with the ExoGeni Corporation logo…dozens of the multi-car transit shuttles like the one they'd just been in…

Next to his shoulder, Williams shook her head. "This makes Jump Zero look like a porta-john – and it's the biggest deep space station the Alliance has."

_Jump Zero…_an old, familiar tightness curled around his chest. _Jump Zero…_images, voices swirled up from the dark corners of his mind – a sudden glint of light reflecting off the leather trim of Shepard's fatigues captured his eye, driving away all distraction. "Yeah," he exhaled slowly, "Jump Zero is big." Shepard took one more step forward, close enough to touch him but still separate, apart. "But this is a whole 'nother scale." The tightness faded – Shepard's gaze was fixed on the vista before them – his eyes followed hers, hoping she hadn't noticed. "Look at the ward arms," he said, leaning onto the ledge, searching for something to say. "How do they keep all that mass from flying apart?"

"If I knew the answer to that I'd have a high-paying desk job in some shiny office tower somewhere," the commander chuckled.

"What," Williams laughed, "You wouldn't miss flying all over the galaxy with us, getting shot at nearly everywhere you go?"

Shepard shook her head, grinning. "The company's fine – and being shot at is nothing new. The food, on the other hand…" Her voice trailed off into a mock sigh.

"I suppose the brass figure if we're brave enough to face breakfast every morning then the Batarians won't stand a chance," Kaidan half-grumbled.

"Hmm," the commander murmured thoughtfully, taking the final step to come up alongside the other two marines. "You might be on to something there, Lieutenant," she nodded, turning her head in every direction to take in the full view. "This place is as big as some of our largest cities back on Earth, and it's only a small slice of the galaxy and the races the Council represents," Shepard said after a long moment looking down the ward arm. "It's no wonder they keep newcomers like us at arms' length when you take a look at this," she continued, the wonder and wistfulness that Kaidan had thought he'd heard in her voice fading away. "We're just a drop in the ocean."

Williams grunted skeptically. "A big drop."

"The Council probably just wants to keep everything running," Kaidan said carefully, watching Shepard's pensive contemplation of the vista before them. "It has to be hard keeping all these cultures working together."

"Or maybe they just don't like humans," Williams snapped.

Her harsh tone broke Shepard out of her reverie. "Why not?" the commander shrugged, stepping back from the ledge. "We've got oceans, beautiful women, this emotion called love…according to the old vids, we have everything they want." She let out a short laugh, shaking her head.

Kaidan felt the words tumble out of his mouth before he could stop them. "Well, when you put it that way there's no reason they wouldn't like you." Williams' head swung around to give him a _Whaaa?_ look – Shepard was still, her expression closed. "I mean us," he stammered, feeling his cheeks flush as red as Shepard's hair. "Humans. Ma'am."

"You don't take much shore leave, do you L–T?" Williams chuckled under her breath.

"All right, laugh it up, Chief," Shepard said, a strange catch in her voice. "Let's move."

Kaidan sensed Williams push herself away from the ledge but did not follow, keeping his eyes fixed on a random tower rising up from the ward arm. He forced himself to breathe slowly and started counting to ten and, hoping it would be long enough for his blush to fade before facing Shepard. _One…I get tripped up just hearing the words 'Jump Zero' – and I haven't had a reaction that strong in years…three…then I say something stupid like that…five…maybe I need to stop by a clinic when we get back on post…seven…my implants might be acting up…nine…yeah, that must be it…ten._ With a deep reluctance, but a deeper fear of the commander's impatience, he started to turn around – only to stop suddenly just halfway through at the sight of Shepard, still standing by the ledge and half-turned herself, facing him.

"I…I appreciate the thought, Alenko," she said quickly, not quite able to look him in the eye. "But, uh, we're on duty here."

_Huh?_ Kaidan shoved aside any reply wondering how being out late at night heading for a gentleman's club was 'on duty' at the sight of a slight tinge of color creeping over Shepard's face. "Um…aye aye, ma'am," he choked out. She gave him a small nod in reply, her eyes flicking up to stare into his for just a moment before she turned and walked away. He watched her move past Williams and back out of the alcove, his thoughts a swirling mess that only the occasional _What-the-hell?_ could surface through.

"Come on, L-T," Williams called out, smirking. "I'll walk drag."

Shepard took a left as they reached the corridor, leading them wordlessly through a set of doors at the far end of another large open atrium. More tall, open rooms lay beyond the doors, but these rooms were filled with semicircular booths manned by sales clerks of all races jabbering with an equally varied clientele. Merchandise of all types lay on top of the counters, inside the display cases or hanging from racks leaning up against the walls – clothing, weapons, jewelry, even several sets of the gimmicky gadgets Kaidan would see advertised on the vidnet whenever his migraines kept him up late at night. Absorbed in their dealings, none of the merchants or customers took notice of the three of them as they followed the commander towards a set of stairs, passing by a blond human man on the landing –

"Is that really? Wow, it's you!"

Kaidan turned his head away from the merchants just in time to see Shepard's shoulder rushing towards his nose – he stopped quickly, rocking forward onto his toes with just enough space to avoid running into the commander. Williams, hanging a step further back, stomped to a stop just behind him. The blond human man was advancing quickly towards the commander, grinning and bouncing as Shepard instinctively reached for a pistol that wasn't resting on her left hip.

"You're Commander, Shepard," the man cried excitedly, "The hero of Eden Prime! I am so honored to meet you!"

Kaidan took half a step towards him but Shepard quickly waved him off. "Nice to meet you," she replied cautiously. "And you are…?"

The man beamed. "My name is Conrad. Conrad Verner. They say you killed more than a hundred Geth on Eden Prime!" he gushed, moving closer to Shepard.

"They say a lot of things," she demurred, shuffling back a few inches to keep her distance from Conrad.

"Of course – you can't talk about it," Conrad laughed. "Classified!" Shepard nodded slightly, casting an obvious glance towards the stairs. "Hey, I know you're probably busy," he continued pulling out a datapad, "But do you have time for a quick autograph?"

Shepard blinked, quickly glancing down at the datapad so Conrad couldn't see the incredulous look on her face. "Uhhh, sure," she said slowly, taking the pen and scribbling on the pad's surface. "Here you go."

"Thanks – I really appreciate it," Conrad grinned. "My wife is going to be so impressed." Shepard nodded, biting back a laugh at the mention of a wife. "I'll let you go, but next time you're on Earth I'd love to buy you a drink. Thanks again!" He skipped away, cradling the datapad in his arms.

Kaidan stepped up next to Shepard as Conrad vanished into the crowd. "Maybe…we should go back, Commander," he said quietly.

"So I can have corporals fawning over me instead of civilians?" she sighed, shaking her head. "Come on – this place is just past these stairs."

The stairs emptied out into another commercial area, noticeably more down-market than the other one with cheaper, flimsier, and sometimes visibly used goods. A hard left through a side door, then across a small interior room and through another entryway led them into a large, open crevasse, levels upon levels of ledges and shuttle tracks extending as far as they could see both above and below. On the other side of the chasm a large, blinking neon silhouette of an Asari covered the entire wall, with a single, small door below it. Shepard didn't break her stride as she followed the walkway across the gap and through the door.

A large, round bar dominated the circular-shaped room, drawing Kaidan's eyes upwards to the low platform in the center of the bar…and the sight of an Asari dancing on top of the platform, clad in what would've been a normal-looking outfit of long pants and a long-sleeved top, but for the unmissable cutouts in the pants exposing her thighs and…

"Hey, Lieutenant," Williams laughed, "Put your tongue back in your mouth before you trip on it."

"I, uh…" Kaidan's cheeks couldn't have burned more if they'd been hot coals – not at the sight of the dancer's backside, but at the thought that Shepard would think he'd enjoyed it. "This…isn't really my thing…" he stammered. "But I can see why this place is so popular. It's got quite the, uh…view."

Shepard shook her head, grinning. "All those leadership classes at the Academy couldn't prepare you for the sight of an Asari in assless pants, could they, Lieutenant?" she asked, shooting him a reassuringly understanding look.

"No ma'am," he replied wholeheartedly, collecting himself enough to survey the rest of the dimly lit scene. Several standing-height tables lined the wall to their left, while a few small alcoves on their right had Asari and a few human female dancers dancing on small stages in front of tables crowded with mostly Turian and male human patrons. Once his initial shock faded he noted that the outfits the dancers wore, while titillating, didn't actually reveal much more than a sports magazine's swimsuit vid. A single, dark hallway was visible near the back of the club, flanked by earpiece-bearing bouncers. "Interesting layout," he murmured.

"It is, isn't it," Shepard said, slowly sweeping her gaze over the space. "Curved room with no corners to hide behind, platform in the middle with a bird's eye view, and all the furniture is bolted to the floor."

Kaidan nodded, the purpose of each feature becoming clear as she named it. "This place is built for defense."

The commander nodded her agreement. "Thoughts, Chief?" she asked, inclining her head towards Williams.

"A million light years from where humanity began and we walk into a bar filled with men drooling over half-naked women shaking their asses on a stage," Williams grumbled, shooting dark looks at a group of older human men in Marine fatigues crowding a table below a particularly curvy Asari dancer. "I can't decide if that's funny or sad."

The commander laughed. "Hey, if that's what it takes to get them to stop staring at me…" Williams and Kaidan both chuckled alongside as Shepard shook her head, smiling. "Just remember, Chief: evolution is not an equal opportunity process."

In spite of knowing he should feel insulted on behalf of his gender, Kaidan couldn't help letting out a soft laugh. "What? They're not here for the food?" he scoffed half-heartedly.

"Only if they're looking to get on the sick-in-quarters list," the commander said, stepping towards an empty standing table along the wall with a good view of both the back hallway and the entrance. A datapad-bearing human waitress, wearing the same revealing garb as the dancers, hurried over. "I'll have a double shot of your best single malt whiskey, neat," Shepard said.

"And you, sir?" the waitress chirped, turning towards Kaidan.

Kaidan froze as Shepard's gaze followed the waitress's. "Um…weren't we on duty?" Williams shot him a dirty look – if it hadn't been for the low light in the club, Kaidan could've sworn he saw Shepard blush. "Alright…do you have Guinness on draft?"

The waitress nodded, making a note on her datapad, and inclined her head towards Williams. "I'll have a Cosmopolitan, please," the chief said. A quick tap of the datapad sent the waitress off towards the bar, leaving Williams fending off quizzical looks from her two companions. "What?" she protested, grinning. "Just because I can turn you into Swiss cheese with my assault rifle doesn't mean I'm not a girl." Shepard laughed, shaking her head, soon joined by Williams, while Kaidan opted for a safe, generic chuckle. "Anyhow, Commander…this thing with the Council tomorrow…" The young marine's smile faded into a nervous frown. "Have you ever done anything like this before?"

"I've briefed entire packs of admirals," Shepard began, leaning up against the wall. "The Joint Chiefs, even some members of the oversight committee. This can't be all that different."

"They…uh…they're not going to ask me any questions, are they?" Williams asked cautiously.

Shepard shook her head as the waitress arrived, carrying a small tray bearing their drinks. "I doubt it," she said, holding out her credit chit as the last drink went onto the table. She stayed silent as the waitress quickly scanned the card, murmured her thanks and moved onto a group of Salarians nearby. "If they did," the commander continued, taking hold of the small glass in front of her, "It would be about the beginning…" She stopped herself from saying _'of the attack'_, glancing around at the crowd with narrowed eyes. "About what happened before the Lieutenant and I arrived," she finished. Williams nodded hesitantly, cradling her drink. "A toast, then," Shepard said brightly, raising her glass and squaring her shoulders. "To the two-twelve – their memory and their survivor."

Williams gulped hard as she lifted her drink. "To the two-thirteen," she rasped.

"To Jenkins," Kaidan said softly, completing the gesture. He tasted his beer – properly chilled and fresh-tasting, even for a place this far out from Earth. _They must ship this in express from the brewery on Terra Nova_, he thought, taking a larger sip – _I should've asked how much they charge before I ordered…_ Williams swallowed a good-sized gulp; Shepard tilted her head back and slung nearly her entire drink down her throat. "Don't worry, Chief," he said to Williams, watching out of the corner of his eye as Shepard waved her glass at the waitress, who nodded and headed back to the bar. "We've made our reports. Now we just have to trust the admiral and the ambassador."

"No we don't, sir," Williams shot back. "You heard the way the ambassador talked to the commander – I don't think he believed a single word in her report." Kaidan and Shepard both frowned in agreement. "He's probably only taking this to the Council because the Admiral and the politicians back home asked him to," Williams said darkly. "And I'll bet if the Council doesn't go along he'd just as soon shove us out an airlock as congratulate us for saving the colony."

Shepard downed the rest of her whiskey. "Maybe," she shrugged, staring down at the table as she put her glass down. "If anyone's going to get slapped around tomorrow it'll be me – I was the officer in charge. You," she continued, glancing over at Kaidan, "Were just following orders. And you," she flicked her gaze onto Williams as the waitress brought her new drink, "Were just trying to do the best you could in the middle of a mess you didn't create. Don't either of you let any politician or politicking admiral tell you any differently." The commander hunched over the table, taking a small sip and letting out a long, relaxing sigh.

Kaidan's ears pricked up at Shepard's last comment, but Williams got her words out first. "Thanks, Commander," she said, hiding a blush behind her blush-colored drink. "That means a lot from you." Shepard's head bobbed one in silent reply. "I mean, I've never met anyone who was awarded the Star of Terra," Williams gushed. "They should probably give you another one for this."

"It's big, ugly, and heavy," Shepard intoned, suppressing a scowl.

Williams' jaw fell open. "It's the Star of Terra, Commander," she sputtered incredulously. "You were the savoir of Elysium, Hero of the Alliance!"

"I was a terrified little twenty-two year-old who thought she'd have a few hours to take some pictures and find a sports bar to watch the final match of Euro 2176 before catching another hop," the commander snapped. "Anyone else would've done the same – I'm no hero."

"Held off an entire enemy platoon – alone?" Williams gaped. "With all due respect, Commander, I – I think you've got somebody watching over you," the chief finished in a lower voice.

The commander stole a quick glance at Williams before resuming her unhappy contemplation of the tabletop. "That's above my pay grade," she sighed. "All I know is I didn't want to die, so I did everything I could to keep that from happening." She took a larger drink of her whisky, the noise of music and conversation around them fading in response to the soft sound of memory in her voice. "But so did a lot of others trapped on Elysium during the Blitz. I got lucky. They didn't." An equally sad and contemplative look settled on Williams' face. "Afterwards," Shepard continued in a stronger, slightly angrier tone, "Some people argued the Star of Terra should only be awarded to a marine whose actions met higher standards."

"Was Admiral Mackenzie one of those people?" Kaidan asked quietly.

Williams glanced from the Kaidan to the commander, frowning. "Who?"

Shepard nodded slowly, giving him a small smile that told him he'd hit the bullseye. "Just before we left for Eden Prime the lieutenant had the distinct privilege of watching me get mouthy with an admiral at an all-fleets staff call."

The chief looked to Kaidan for confirmation, which he gave with a laugh and a nod. "Like you talked back to the ambassador?" Williams asked, grinning.

"No," Shepard said quickly. "That was just my normal attitude with members of senior leadership who say very stupid things. With Mackenzie, it's…" She drummed her fingers against the table. "It's complicated."

Williams snorted. "Complicated? Were you a junior officer on his staff who told him to shove his roving hands up his backside?"

"No," Shepard said, letting out a single, short laugh. "That'd be easier." All three took long, slow pulls from their drinks as Shepard gathered herself. "Seven years ago, Rear Admiral Mackenzie was the CO of the 47th Expeditionary Division," she said slowly.

That unit's name rang a very loud bell in Kaidan's head. "They were the first forces that arrived to raise the siege of Elysium."

"You see where this is going?" Shepard asked ruefully. He nodded, reaching for his beer. "Mackenzie has always felt that the bravery and accomplishments of his marines were ignored in favor of making a hero out of me," she explained to a still-perplexed Williams. "He's hated me and everything I've been involved in ever since. I try to give him a pass, but some days he just pushes my buttons."

"Why give an ass like that the benefit of the doubt?" Williams asked.

Shepard shook her head vehemently. "Because he's not wrong," she insisted with a strange a mixture of sadness and anger. "A lot of things got pushed aside in the rush to shove me up on a pedestal, not just his troops." The anger faded into a regretful bitterness as she let out a long breath. "There was this platoon of marines in a small garrison at the edge of the city who sacrificed themselves to slow the Batarians' advance," she sighed, her gaze drifting off into an indefinable memory, "Giving the rest of us the time we needed to organize a defense. They all got the Star of Terra posthumously, sure, but does anyone but their families know their names?" Kaidan and Williams traded chagrined glances. "Then there were the civilians," Shepard continued in a low, hoarse, voice, "Most of whom had never fired a gun in their lives, taking blood-spattered rifles out of the hands of dead marines and shooting back until the weapon got so hot it burned their hands. Colonists, traders, tourists, and travelers just passing through at the wrong time – they fought just as hard as any marine, and many died just as hard as any of us would be proud to die." She took a large gulp of her drink as a small shudder rippled through her shoulders. "Did any of that make the headlines? No. They picked me."

"Do you know why?" Kaidan asked carefully, chilled by the feeling that the number of people who'd heard Shepard say these things before could be counted on one hand or one finger – _or less_.

"No idea," she shrugged, frowning. "After the siege was lifted I was out for nearly two days while they fixed me. By the time I woke up my face was already all over the news vids." The commander leaned back into the slight curve of the wall, cradling her drink in her hands. "'Hero of Heroes', the captions read," she muttered. "I don't know which genius in the PAO picked my name out of the hat but all I did was my job."

Williams shook her head vigorously, setting her nearly empty drink on the table. "Nobody had to pluck your name out of the air, ma'am – you singled yourself out," she said forcefully. I know we've all heard too much of that 'Marine first, individual second' crap the brass all talk about these days – your professors at the Academy probably repeated it so much you could give their lectures in your sleep – but you are a damn hero." Shepard swallowed half of her drink, then sighed. "How many dozens of soldiers and civilians would've died during the Blitz if it hadn't been for you," the chief continued insistently, "Just you. No disrespect, ma'am…but you earned that medal. And anyone who says otherwise should have it shoved up their backside – especially if it is big, ugly, and heavy," Williams finished, glowering.

The commander swirled the remaining liquid around in her glass slowly as she gave Williams a long, sharp look through narrowed eyes. "You've got a bit of an attitude there, Williams," she said quietly, taking a sip of her drink while the chief stood motionless, hoping stiffness would hide sudden uncertainty. After a few moments Shepard lowered the glass, grinning. "I like it." The chief smiled in return, her shoulders relaxing. "And I'll let it slide this time," the commander added, "But if you ever accuse me of being an Academy brat again you'll be spending the night in the brig."

"Uh…" Williams' smile faded slightly. "Sorry ma'am. I just didn't have you figured for the university ROTC type."

Shepard shook her head. "I'm neither. I started out as a regular enlistee for about a year, then I went to Officer Candidate School."

"Really?" Williams gaped. "I wasn't sure OCS was still around," she shrugged.

"There aren't many of us – usually just one class a year," Shepard acknowledged, shooting a skeptical glance at the chief. "Nobody ever talked to you about it?" she asked lightly.

"No," Williams frowned. "Why would –" A heavily-armored figure shoved its way past her – she started to turn around, a nasty remark on her lips when the commander's hand caught the young marine's elbow, pulling her back towards the table. Shepard shook her head, her eyes following the silhouette that had passed by with sharp concern as she leaned back against the wall, waving Williams and Kaidan to do the same. Glancing over their shoulders they recognized the unmistakable hulking, hunched shape of a Krogan and complied, watching as the Krogan marched up towards the dark hallway in the back of the club.

The Krogan bouncer on the left side of the hall stepped forward to cut off the other's advance. "Back off, Wrex," he snarled. "Fist told us to take you down if you showed up."

"What are you waiting for?" Wrex replied tauntingly. Three long scars ran down the right side of his face, giving him an intimidating air even without noticing the impressive assortment of weapons mounted on his armor. "I'm standing right here." The other Krogan jerked his head at the crowds in the bar, his long, thin lips twisting into a snarl. "This is Fist's only chance – if he's smart, he'll take it," Wrex growled.

"He's not coming out, Wrex," the bouncer intoned. "End of story."

Wrex grunted angrily. "This story is just beginning." He spun around – fairly nimbly for a Krogan – and began striding towards the exit. Shepard took a small step forward, trying to see where the bouncer was going, but had to jump back as Wrex stormed past. "Out of my way, humans," he snarled, "I have no quarrel with you."

Kaidan barely had time to turn and see him walking away before the club's door had closed behind him. "What was that all about?" he muttered, turning back towards Shepard and Williams.

"Who knows?" the chief shrugged. "Let's just try not to get caught in the middle."

"If there's anything to be caught in the middle of, maybe we should go," Kaidan urged.

"Why?" Shepard shrugged. "He doesn't have any problem with anyone except this Fist guy – probably the owner or manager. We're fine."

Kaidan frowned. "But he said he's going to try to kill this Fist."

"And I'm sure he will, but not in the middle of a crowded club – he wanted Fist to come out so they could go elsewhere," Shepard replied, taking another sip of her drink. Kaidan shook his head, unconvinced. "When the gangsters, criminals, bounty hunters and the like get killed the police usually investigate only as much as necessary to satisfy themselves that the killer was somebody else from that world. Then they go back to focusing their efforts on crimes against the people who they think actually matter. C-Sec's probably no different – so long as Fist's death is clean and quiet they won't waste too much time on it. But if it happened in here, and a single civilian so much as sprained an ankle in the scramble to get away they'd tear this station apart to find Wrex. And you don't get to be a good enough bounty hunter to get contracts on the Citadel without knowing that."

"Yea," Kaidan sighed, scowling at his drink – she was right, of course, and he felt like a plebe whose ignorance had just forced his professor to explain why the sky was blue. _Rayleigh scattering, etc etc etc…or at least, *supposed* to be blue_, he amended, thinking of the gray-brown sky that loomed over his parents' house most days.

Shepard let out an equally long sigh. "If it really makes you nervous we'll finish our drinks and head back, okay?"

"No," he said quickly. "It's fine – I've just, uh, never spent much time contemplating the business practices of bounty hunters, that's all." He reached for his beer and forced himself to smile. "Besides, even a nasty-looking Krogan would probably think twice in the presence of the amazing Commander Shepard," he added.

The laugh on Shepard's lips quickly turned into a jokingly indignant glare. "Both of you now?" she muttered, hiding her smile behind her glass. "Guess I'll have to have a word with the captain about your liberty privileges."

"Hey," Williams said quickly, "You wouldn't want us to be pushovers, would you?"

Shepard grunted noncommittally, draining the remainder of her drink. "Hell no," she replied, sighing, "But I want you to be awake and alert, too. So drink up – even I need my beauty sleep," she smirked, giving Kaidan a grin as she set her empty glass on the table with a firm thump.

"Aye aye, ma'am," Williams chirped, swallowing the contents of her glass in two gulps. Kaidan looked down at his drink sadly – he hated leaving good beer behind – only to blink in surprise at the few sips that were left at the bottom. Shaking his head and wondering how he'd managed to have that much without noticing, he tipped his head back and finished it off. Shepard gave them both nods as their glasses hit the table, then turned and made for the door.

The two Turians lounging casually halfway down either side of the walkway had Kaidan reaching for weapons that weren't there as soon as the doors opened. When their guns snapped up as one cried "That's her!" he scrambled out of the narrow doorway, feeling Shepard shoving Williams back into the club as she ducked the first shots from the one of the left. Kaidan unleashed a blast of biotic energy so strong it left his whole arm tingling at that Turian, watching him slam back against the wall as clatter down onto the floor, his head hanging off his body at a fatal angle. A bullet whizzed by his ear – he turned to see the second Turian advancing from the righthand walkway, assault rifle raised and aimed directly at him –

A crackling wave of biotic energy surged past him, striking the Turian squarely in the chest and sending him tumbling over the railing, falling down into the chasm between walkways with a high-pitched, fading scream – ceasing suddenly at the dull thud of a body striking one of the many aircars gliding through the space below. Kaidan, his skin tingling from the strength of the blast, turned just in time to see the blue glimmer of a biotic swirling around Shepard as she lowered her right arm. "Are you hit?" she asked anxiously, moving towards him.

"I'm fine," he said, staring at the fading energy field illuminating her figure. "You…you're a biotic?"

She pressed her lips together grimly. "You think I would've taken a single step outside the security perimeter unarmed if I wasn't?" The doors to the club swished open – Williams came sprinting out.

"What happened – are you guys okay?" Williams asked, glancing over at the first Turian's body.

"We're fine," Shepard replied quickly. "That one and another one were waiting for us."

Kaidan glared at the corpse. "These must've been Saren's men," he said softly as the door from the main area of the ward opened. Half a dozen C-Sec officers of varying species swarmed through, advancing up either side of the walkway with their weapons drawn. The commander crossed her arms across her chest, lifting her chin with the same confidence and defiance she'd brandished at the Ambassador. Kaidan drew himself up alongside her, feeling his own posture stiffen to match hers.

The leading figure, a Turian, came to a stop at the body of the first attacker. "We had a report of a disturbance," he said in the typical raspy, metallic Turian voice, staring down at the corpse.

"There was a disturbance," Shepard replied smoothly. "It's over now."

The Turian put his rifle away. "This one always traveled with a friend," he said.

Shepard nodded as the rest of the C-Sec officers holstered their weapons. "The friend went over the railing," she said brightly, waving a hand at the scorch marks her biotic blast had left behind.

One of the officers closest to it leaned over the rail, looking down the deep gap and shaking his head in response to an inquiring glance from the Turian officer. "I'd been looking for these two," the Turian sighed.

"And apparently they were looking for me," Shepard muttered, taking a step closer to the Turian.

He focused his gaze on her for the first time, recognition and surprise rippling through the flaps of skin above his jaw bone. "You're Commander Shepard. What are you doing here?"

"Having a drink," she replied, ignoring the _I-told-you-so _cough from Kaidan. "We were leaving to go back to the Alliance facilities when we were ambushed."

The Turian stepped back, sighing. "They were working for Saren, and – "

Williams snorted. "No sh-"

"Chief!" Shepard snapped in a low voice, giving the other woman a warning look. Williams quickly closed her mouth and dropped her head to stare at the floor. "Do you need us to stay here much longer, Officer…?" the commander asked, turning back towards the Turian.

"Vakarian," he replied smartly. "Garrus Vakarian. And no," he continued, nodding at Shepard. "If I'll need your statements I think I'll know where to find you. Best to get yourselves back to your quarters before the press arrives."

Shepard gave him a sharp nod in reply. "Good evening, then." She stepped around the cluster of officers and started down the walkway, her pace firm and steady. Williams and Kaidan gave the Turian officer quick looks of thanks before hurrying after the commander.

The tram was already arriving at the small, dim station next to the gateway to the club when Kaidan and Williams caught up with Shepard. She hurried inside, glancing around quickly for anyone watching them, then retreated to a relatively windowless corner of the car as it pulled away.

"Well, that was exciting," Williams said, dropping down into the nearest seat.

Kaidan moved closer to the commander, wrapping an arm around one of the many poles in the center of the car. "Saren must've put a hit out on you, ma'am," he said quietly.

"I should've expected it," she said angrily, leaning up against the wall. "A Spectre wouldn't waste any time eliminating a potential threat to his plans."

"Once he's stripped of his Spectre status he'll be handcuffed," Kaidan said hopefully. "He won't be able to access any Citadel resources or powers anywhere in the galaxy."

Williams snorted. "Just an army of Geth and a huge, unknown warship," she muttered.

"We'll see what happens tomorrow," Shepard said tightly, the blurred sights swishing by the tram fading from neon blurs of the Wards to the softer hues of the Presidium. "The admiral's staff said they could procure some Class A uniforms for the three of us, ribbons and all – promised we'd have them by 0800," she added, pushing herself away from the wall and moving closer to the doors. "We'll need to be at the Tower no later than 0830 to meet the captain and the ambassador."

"Yes, ma'am," Kaidan and Williams both replied as the tram slowed, then stopped. They exited quickly, Kaidan heaving a sigh of relief at the continued absence of any reporters or cameras.

Shepard led them towards the security entrance to fleet headquarters at a brisk pace. Swiping her ID card with a quick nod at the drowsy MP, she stayed one step ahead of the others as they moved through the halls until they reached the conference room leading to the swing space where their bunks were set up. "Get some sleep," she said over her shoulder, charging through the doors into the darkened room.

* * *

Fifth Fleet's quartermasters were better than their word – Kaidan awoke at 0715 to the sight of a small storage container by the side of his bunk, an immaculately folded and pressed copy of his Class A uniform resting inside. They'd even managed to include a properly polished pair of dress shoes in his exact half-size. An identical container sat next to the still-snoring Williams on the other side of the room. Rolling over, he was not surprised to see the container by Shepard's bunk already opened and emptied, her bed made neatly enough to please even the most obsessive drill instructor. Almost all the rest of the crew was asleep – Shepard having arranged for everyone else to take a guided tour of the Presidium that didn't start until 1000 – so Kaidan moved as quietly as he could get out of his bed with a minimum of squeaking and creaking from its metal springs. _We can travel halfway across the galaxy and colonize dozens of worlds and yet the Procurement and Supply Command still won't pony up for a halfway-decent bed kit_, he grumbled, shuffling over towards Williams. He gave her shoulder a gentle shake, stepping back as she snorted and rolled over, rubbing her eyes. "Time to get up, Chief," he whispered, waiting until she acknowledged him with a sleepy, yawning nod before tiptoeing away.

Kaidan got ready as quickly as he could, showing and shaving before taking a few minutes to make sure all his ribbons and bars were polished and properly placed on his uniform. _Shepard will expect nothing less_. He arrived back at the conference room just after 0745, nodding at a pair of civilians who were just laying out some pastries on the table alongside canned coffee, juice and water. The vid screens were on and tuned to the Alliance Forces News Network's morning news show. Footage of the destruction of Eden Prime was playing as the anchor spoke somberly about the uncertain casualty figures. "Too many," he muttered, cracking open the door to the larger room just far enough to verify that Williams was no longer in her bunk.

Closing the door, he dropped down into a chair halfway between the breakfast spread and the vid screen, now displaying a large image of Shepard being awarded the Star of Terra by the then-prime minister of the Alliance. _She really might get another one of those_, he thought, surveying the pastries unenthusiastically. _The Distinguished Service Medal for sur_ – his quick glance back at the vid screen froze at the sight of his own face staring back at him. A much younger version of himself, bright-eyed and grinning in the grey dress uniform of an Academy cadet, the four gold stripes on his shoulder betraying his status as a battalion commander and graduating firstie. His name and current rank flashed by on the crawl, as the picture shrank back to a half-screen and was joined by an equally young and formal image of Williams. _Great…_ He turned away from the screen, trying to shrink back into the chair as one of the civilians looked from him to the screen and then back again. "That will be all, thank you," Kaidan said quickly, giving both civilians a nod as they hurried out of the room, whispering and glancing back as the door closed behind them.

Kaidan flipped open the vid control panel on the table and quickly changed the channel, flipping through several different news channels – all running some story on Shepard or Eden Prime – until he landed on a sports highlights show. _She didn't get to see the end of the match_, he reasoned, turning back to the pile of beige-colored offerings in the center of the table. _She'll want to know if she owes the admiral a hundred credits or not._ Picking up the closest square pastry, he frowned at the unidentifiable reddish-purple filling that refused to move even when he turned it upside-down. He'd gotten used to the rehydrated foods served on Alliance ships and most stations, either single-serve or dumped into serving trays to fool you into thinking they were freshly made – at least until you took the first bite. But the larger stations like Arcturus could get shipments of fresh foods a once or twice a week, and he'd figured in a place as large and populous as the Citadel they could at least scrounge up some real scrambled eggs…or even some fresh fruit like the green apples that grew in the trees below his bedroom window back home. His mouth began to water at the mere memory of his mother's special Saturday morning pancakes, made with small, crispy pieces of hickory-smoked bacon in the batter and dripping with the homemade maple syrup they got every year from his aunt Joan over in Ontario's lake country. _Chief's right_, he sighed, reaching for a can of coffee. _I need to start taking more shore leave._

The door from the hall slid open, admitting a sleepy-eyed Williams into the room. "Morning, sir," she mumbled, heading straight for the stacks of canned coffee.

"Good morning, chief," he replied, gingerly taking a bite of his pastry. "Did you get enough sleep?"

Williams shrugged, grabbing two cans and something resembling a croissant. "It'll do. Have you seen the commander?" she asked, sliding into a nearby chair.

"Not yet." He took another bite – whatever the filling was, it wasn't half bad. "She was already gone when I got up."

"No surprise there," Williams nodded, cracking one can open and gulping down half of its contents. Kaidan fell into silence, gazing up absentmindedly at the vid screen as Williams tore into her croissant.

The doors slid open again – Kaidan twisted his head around just in time as the captain striding into the room to scramble to his feet and snap to attention before the commander, following close behind, could catch sight of him. "Ready?" Anderson asked curtly.

"Yes, sir!" Kaidan replied, hearing Williams echoing his words half a syllable behind. Behind the captain's shoulder he saw Shepard sweeping her gaze over his uniform, nodding approvingly.

Anderson barely waited for them to finish before turning around. "Let's go," he said briskly, striding past Shepard and back out into the hall. She waited for Kaidan and Williams to leave before falling in behind them wordlessly.

With more time to prepare than they'd had the day before, C-Sec had locked down the sections of the Presidium between the Alliance facilities and the Citadel Tower. Kaidan could see some security cordons on the other side of the walkways spanning the central lake, with C-Sec officers three rows deep keeping the shouting reporters and their floating, flashing recorders at bay. It even seemed the fountains had been turned up to drown out the sound of their words. "Uh, Captain?" Kaidan asked hesitantly, "How does this work, sir?"

"The Ambassador will do most of the talking," Anderson replied tersely. "We're just there to help him with the details."

Something in the captain's tone plucked at the nerves on the back of Kaidan's neck – he suddenly longed to be able to turn around and see the look on Shepard's face, to trade glances with her and see if her eyes betrayed the same cautious concern he couldn't shake. But she carefully maintained her position one step behind him, even when he slowed, and he could see without seeing that the calm, impassive expression she always maintained in the presence of superior officers was firmly in place.

The Ambassador was waiting for them at the base of the Tower, tapping his foot on the floor as they approached. "Good morning, Ambassador," Anderson said evenly, coming to a stop in front of the door to the lone elevator allowing access to the Tower from this public area of the Presidium.

"Captain," the Ambassador replied, his eyes shifting from Anderson to the other three marines. "Let's not keep the Council waiting," he said, pressing a button and turning as the elevator door slid up to admit them.

The long ride passed in silence – Anderson and Udina studying random parts of the elevator walls – Williams's gaze fixed on the panoramic view of the rapidly receding Presidium – Shepard back in an at-ease stance, staring pensively at the door – and Kaidan's eyes shifting back and forth from the commander to the captain and back again. A generic male voice squawked softly out of the speakers in the elevator's ceiling, reading the days' headlines – the attack on Eden Prime was still the lead story. Anderson suddenly grew impatient and anxious, drumming his fingers against the railing, then against his arm, then finally clasping his hands together only to start tapping a foot against the floor.

After what seemed like an eternity the elevator lit up and slowed, signaling their arrival at the top of the Citadel Tower. A light floral fragrance drifted through the air as soon as the door slid open, though Kaidan had to wait for the higher-ranking officers in the group to file out and through the elevator bays before he could follow them to catch sight of the source. A smaller, quieter cousin of the large fountains in the Presidium bubbled in front of them. Looking up he saw dozens of large, arching trees bearing dozens of soft pink blossoms ringed either side of a tall atrium, not just at the lower level they had stepped into but continuing up the wide stairways into the higher levels beyond. Through the branches he could see walkways and doors ringing the lower floors of the tower, topped by several stories of windows stretching all the way up to the ceiling. The yellow-orange glow of the interior of the ward arms were visible through some, the darkness of space dotted with stars through the other, each image slowly sliding from one pane to another as the station rotated. "Whoa," he heard Williams sigh softly behind him.

The captain and the ambassador charged around the fountain without glance, either familiar enough with the vista to no longer be struck by its gentle charm or intent enough upon their goal to neither notice nor care. Shepard's step faltered for a moment, her gaze unwillingly dragged upwards as she took in the view. "Look sharp, marines," she breathed, glancing quickly back towards Kaidan and Williams before heading for the stairs at a more measured pace. "Let's try not to stare."

They hadn't taken more than two steps out of the elevator bay before the sight of two Turians standing at the top of the stairs leading to the fountain stopped Williams short. "Commander!" she cried, taking a step back.

"Relax, Chief," Shepard replied quickly, "They're C-Sec." Williams blushed, then gave the commander a nervous smile and nod. "Besides," Shepard added, "Don't you recognize the one on the right?"

Kaidan was better than most humans at telling Turians apart – which meant he wasn't very good at it, really, but had guessed right a couple of times. He traded _If-she-says-so…_ glances with Williams as Shepard approached the Turians, coming to a stop at the foot of the stairs. "Saren's hiding something!" the Turian on the right exclaimed angrily. Kaidan's memory clicked – he did recognize the voice, if not the face, of the officer they'd spoken with the night before. "Give me more time," the officer continued. "Stall them. Tell them –"

The other Turian shook his head. "Stall the Council?" The officer stepped back, sighing. "Don't be ridiculous! Your investigation is over, Garrus," he snapped, turning away from the officer with a dismissive wave of his hand.

Shepard took a heavy, loud step onto the first stair, causing the officer's head to snap around in her direction. "Commander Shepard," he said, nodding.

"Officer Vakarian," she responded calmly, moving slowly up the rest of the stairs. "You ran C-Sec's investigation into Saren?"

"Such as it was," he grumbled, glaring at the vanishing figure of the other Turian. "Most of his activities are classified – I couldn't find anything solid. The best leads I had dried up last night when the operatives I'd been following had…an accident," he rasped, shooting a look at Shepard that was more exasperated than angry. She gave a small, _What-was-I-supposed-to-do?_ shrug in response. "Another one surfaced this morning, but I need time to track it down. Time I apparently won't have," Garrus added with a frustrated sigh.

Shepard nodded. "So it would seem," she said slowly. "But you don't really think this meeting is going to be the end of all this, do you?"

"Absolutely not," Garrus growled. "I know he's up to something. Like you humans say, I feel it in my gut. And I'll find it – one way or another." He gave Shepard a single, sharp nod before pivoting around and heading off in the same direction the other Turian had gone.

Kaidan stepped close to Shepard as Garrus strode away. "What was that?" he murmured.

"That," she said softly, "Is a C-Sec officer who's going to pursue his new lead, whether he's supposed to or not." The sound of a cleared throat echoed through the chamber, snapping Shepard's eyes up to an impatient Anderson waiting at the top of the next set of stairs. "Come on," she sighed, moving quickly to catch up with the others. "Let's get this over with."

Ambassador Udina was halfway through his summary of the attack on Eden Prime as they topped the last set of stairs and entered the Council chamber. He stood at the far end of a long platform extending out over an enclosed garden, facing the three councilors, who stood on a broad ledge jutting out from the far wall, a large picture window offering an expansive view of the entire interior of the Citadel behind them. The Asari Councilor occupied the position of honor in the center, with the Turian Councilor on her right and the Salarian Councilor on the other side. To the Council's right a holoprojector was beaming a dominating, larger-than-life image of Saren into the empty space above, his arms crossed as he sneered down at the approaching humans. They came to a halt just behind the ambassador – Anderson nearly alongside him, with Shepard a step further back, and Williams and Kaidan a step behind her. _Speak only if spoken to_, Kaidan reminded himself, settling into as comfortable an at-ease stance as he could manage. _We're probably going to be here a while._

Instead, the ambassador's account of the attack and Saren's role in it was surprisingly short. Though all the sounds and images of that day filled Kaidan's mind as each moment was described, hearing the simple, plain facts spoken aloud revealed just how thin they were. _We don't really have any solid evidence against Saren_, he realized, listening to the few fragile words echoing emptily in the grand chamber – nothing that would even have been admitted to the informal cadet honor court back at the Academy. A quick glance at the grim set of Shepard's jaw told him she was thinking the same thing. _And with C-Sec coming up empty-handed…_he stifled a sigh, afraid it would be heard. _This is not going to go well._

"And so," Udina said, raising the volume and tension in his voice as he reached the end of his prepared statement, "due to serious nature of the allegations against him, the Alliance requests that Agent Saren be stripped of his Spectre status and handed over to Alliance authorities so he can be tried for his crimes in the attack on Eden Prime."

The Councilors stayed silent for a long moment, each looking at the other cautiously before resuming their contemplation of the consoles before them. Finally, the Asari councilor cleared her throat. "The Geth attack is a matter of some concern, Ambassador," she began, "But there is no real evidence here that Saren was involved in any way." Udina stepped forward, raising an arm to retort, but she cut him off with a wae of her hand. "Executor Pallin," the councilor continued, turning towards the uniformed Turian they'd seen speaking with Garrus earlier, standing off on a ledge to the Council's left. "What are the findings of the C-Sec investigation into these allegations?"

The Executor cleared his throat. "We have found no evidence at this time to support the allegations of Agent Saren's involvement with the Geth and the attack on Eden Prime," he said carefully, keeping his gaze fixed on the councilors.

"Have you found any evidence that disproves the existence of such an alliance?" Udina snapped. Behind him, Captain Anderson began rapidly tapping one foot against the floor. "Or that Saren could not have been on Eden Prime at the time of the attack?"

"No," Pallin acknowledged evenly, "We have not found any such evidence at this time."

The Salarian councilor shook his head with an audible sigh. "So what you've found to date is, essentially, nothing," he said.

"That is correct," Pallin nodded.

"An eyewitness saw him kill Nihlus in cold blood!" Udina retorted, his cheeks coloring as the Council turned their cool, skeptical gazes to him.

"We've read the Eden Prime reports, Ambassador," the Salarian councilor said evenly. "The testimony of one traumatized dockworker is hardly compelling proof."

"I resent these accusations," rumbled a low voice edged with the sharp distortion of electronic transmission - Saren. "Nihlus was a fellow Spectre, and a friend."

The tapping ceased as Captain Anderson took half a step forward, unable to contain himself any longer. "That's how you caught him off guard!" he shouted angrily at Saren, raising a hand to point accusingly at the orange-hued hologram. Udina's head whipped around, fury and embarrassment etched in the deep lines of his face, but turned back to the Council just as quickly, the inscrutable mask of politics back in place.

"Captain Anderson," Saren purred, his head tilting slightly in an air of contemptuous amusement. "You always seem to be involved when humanity makes false charges against me." Anderson's hands balled into fists as he managed to hold back the profane retort threatening to escape from his tightly-closed lips. "And this must be your protégé, Commander Shepard," the Spectre continued smoothly, shifting his gaze. "The one who let the beacon get destroyed."

Kaidan glanced back at the commander – a slight twitch of her shoulders was her only visible acknowledgment of her entry into the conversation, though standing behind her he could see her hands clenched behind her back so tightly her knuckles were white. "You seem to know a lot about a supposedly top-secret mission you weren't a part of," she said tersely.

"When Nihlus died his files passed to me," Saren explained with a wave of hand, though Kaidan thought he saw the hologram's eyes narrow momentarily. "I read the Eden Prime reports; I was unimpressed," he sighed contemptuously, shaking his head. "But what can you expect from a human?"

"More resistance than you and your Geth allies anticipated," Shepard replied calmly, "If the sloppy attempt to destroy the spaceport is anything to go on."

Even the blurry hologram couldn't hide the surprise and anger that rippled through Saren's features. "Your species needs to learn its place, Shepard," he spat. "You're not ready to join the Council. You're not even ready to join the Specters!"

"He has no right to say that!" Udina shouted, lunging at the transparent figure so violently he had to grab onto the comm panel at the edge of the platform to keep his balance. "That's not his decision!" he thundered, turning back towards the Council.

The Asari councilor seemed to stifle a small sigh as she turned towards Saren. "Shepard's admission into the Specters is not the purpose of this meeting," she said to him with the weary but firm air of someone who'd said those same words several times.

"This meeting has no purpose," Saren snapped. "The humans are wasting your time, Councilor. And mine."

"There is still one outstanding issue," Captain Anderson insisted, taking another step forward. "Commander Shepard's vision. It may have been triggered by the beacon." He glanced back at Shepard, then up at the Council as Udina, beside him, gave a single shake of his head.

Saren snorted derisively. "Are we allowing dreams into testimony now?" he asked, his voice a carefully blended mixture of anger and disdain. "How can I defend my innocence against this kind of testimony?" Shepard's jaw tensed and clenched, keeping whatever retort she wanted to give locked inside.

"I agree," the Turian councilor said quickly. "Our decisions must be based on facts and evidence, not wild reckonings and speculation." Anderson lowered his head sadly as the other councilors nodded their agreement.

"Do you have anything else to add, Ambassador?" the Salarian councilor asked. "No, Councillor," Udina replied heavily.

The three Councilors glanced at each other for a long moment before the Asari Councilor tapped a single finger against the comm panel in front of her. "The Council has found no evidence of any connection between Saren and the Geth," she pronounced. "Ambassador, your petition to have him disbarred from the Specters is denied."

"I'm glad to see justice was served," Saren muttered from above.

The Asari Councilor threw half a glance upwards before looking back towards the humans on the platform. "This meeting is adjourned."

Udina acknowledged their decision with a small, short nod, waiting in silence as the Council filed out of the chamber and the holoprojector shut down, the image of Saren blinking out with a soft beep. No sooner had the doors to the private antechamber swished shut than he rounded on Anderson. "It was a mistake bringing you into that hearing, Captain," he snarled, his face flushing a deep, angry red. "You and Saren have too much history. It made the Council question our motives."

"I know Saren," Anderson insisted. "He's working with the geth for one reason – to exterminate every human in the galaxy." His voice rose as he continued, looking from the Ambassador to Shepard and then back again. "Every colony we have is at risk – every world we control is in danger. Even Earth isn't safe!" Shepard raised her eyebrows as he turned to her again, the unspoken question smoldering in her eyes. "I worked with him on a mission a long time ago," Anderson sighed, nodding sadly. "Things went bad. Real bad. He has to be stopped." The commander gave him a single, grim nod in reply, but Kaidan saw a wariness in her gaze that hadn't been there before.

"What options do we have?" Shepard asked, inclining her head towards the Ambassador.

Udina sighed, frowning. "As a Spectre, he's virtually untouchable – unless we find some way to expose him."

Kaidan leaned closer to Shepard. "What about Garrus," he whispered, "That C-Sec investigator?"

"Who – what?" Anderson asked sharply.

"He was the one tasked with investigating Saren" Shepard said quickly. "We saw him arguing with the Executor when we arrived – he claimed to have a promising lead."

The Ambassador nodded, smiling slightly. "I have a contact in C-Sec who could help us track Garrus down. His name is Harkin."

"Forget it," Anderson snapped, shaking his head in disgust. "They suspended Harkin last month. Drinking on the job. I won't waste my time with him."

"You won't have to," Udina replied sharply. Shepard's head jerked in his direction, her jaw set into a wary scowl. "I don't want the Council using your past history with Saren as an excuse to ignore anything we turn up," the Ambassador continued, softening his tone to a level of polite patronization. "Shepard will handle this." He turned towards the commander expectantly, but his empty smile faded in the face of her witheringly angry gaze.

She stared at him, eyes blazing indignantly for a few moments, before working her jaw back and forth until she willed it open. "I'll take care of it," she said tersely, her glare reasserting itself as soon as the last word left her lips.

Udina gave her a curt nod, ignoring the slumped shoulders of the Captain. "I need to take care of some business," he muttered. "Captain, meet me in my office later." Without even raising his eyes to look at Anderson, he turned and strode away.

Shepard swallowed hard, staring daggers at the retreating figure of Udina, but said nothing until she turned her head back towards the marines behind her. "Alenko – Williams," she said briskly. "Head back and change into something…heavily armed."

"Yes ma'am," Williams grinned, saluting quickly before bounding away happily. Kaidan bit his lip, the dozens of different things he wanted to say washed away by the thousands of things he saw passing between Anderson and Shepard's eyes. "We'll be waiting for you, Commander," he said evenly, waiting for her silent nod of reply before following reluctantly after the Chief.

* * *

The passage of time from late evening to midmorning had gone unnoticed inside the walls of Chora's Den. It was still just as dim, just as crowded, the air just as stale despite the constant buzz of the air recyclers mounted around the edges of the ceiling.

Kaidan's eyes had barely surveyed half of the club before Shepard was on the move, waving him and Williams to follow.

Sidestepping a mumbling, staggering Turian, she made a beeline for a middle-aged human man slouched into a chair against the far wall, a collection of empty glasses on the table before him. She came to a stop in front of his table with a heavy thud from her boots, the neon lights from a nearby dancer's platform reflecting off the top of his nearly bald head as he looked up at her, blinking. "Hey there, sweetheart," he rasped, his eyes sliding from the curve of Shepard's molded armor to the pistol on her hip. "You looking for some fun? 'Cause I gotta say that soldier getup looks real good on that bod of yours." His gaze drifted up to the hilts of assault and sniper rifles, visible over her shoulders, before focusing in on her face and attempting to flash her a drunken, sloppy grin. "Why don't you sit your sweet little ass down beside old Harkin?"

Shepard's lip curled up into a contemptuous sneer. "Why don't you knock off the bull before you find yourself picking your teeth up off the floor." Harkin started as if a glass of water had been thrown in his face, sitting up a bit straighter in his chair. "I'm looking for a Turian C-Sec officer named Garrus Varkarian," Shepard continued. "For some reason, I'm told you might know where he is."

"Garrus?" Harkin repeated. Shepard crossed her arms over her chest, scowling down at him with a look that wondered if he could find his ass with his own hands. "You must be one of Anderson's crew," Harkin said, glancing at Williams and Kaidan. Poor bastard's still trying to bring Saren down, eh?" He smirked at the surprise and confusion that dawned on two marines' faces. "I know where Garrus is. But you gotta tell me something first. Did the captain let you in on his big secret?" he asked, turning his grin back to Shepard.

"I don't have time to chat," she said flatly, unmoved.

Harkin laughed. "But it's all related, you see. The captain used to be a Spectre. Didn't know that, did you? It was all very hush-hush. The first human given that honor. And then he blew it," he said, chuckling as he downed half his drink in a single gulp. "Screwed up his mission so bad they kicked him out. Of course, he blames Saren. Says the turian set him up."

The commander took a single step closer to Harkin, lightly laying a hand on the hilt of her pistol. "Not my concern. Just tell me where Garrus went."

"Fine," he sighed, disappointed. "Garrus was sniffing around Dr. Michel's office earlier this morning – the med clinic on the other side of this ward. Last I heard he was going back there."

"Thanks," Shepard said, tossing a credit chip onto the table before turning back towards Williams and Kaidan. "Let's –"

"I don't need your pity," Harkin snarled, swiping the chip off the table and onto the floor.

Shepard looked down at the chip, then back up at Harkin, her expression calm and closed. "Who said you had it?" She marched away, Williams and Kaidan pausing only long enough to throw disgusted glares at Harkin before hurrying after her.

They were just outside the club when Williams stepped up just behind Shepard's shoulder. "Why didn't Captain Anderson tell us he used to be a Spectre?" she asked angrily.

"Maybe it's not true," Kaidan interjected. "That guy was an ass. I bet he's just messing with our heads."

"Yeah, you're probably right," Williams said, though she didn't sound like she believed it. "Still, I'd like to hear what the captain has to say about all this," she added, looking up at the commander.

The set of Shepard's jaw was tight and tense, but her voice was even. "Whether it is or not, it doesn't change our objective," she said firmly as they approached the alleyway leading to the rest of the ward. "The Captain didn't plant Saren's name on that dockworker's lips, and he sure as hell didn't plant Saren's bullet in Nihlus' brain."

"Yes, ma'am," both Williams and Kaidan murmured, knowing a superior officer's _cut-the-chatter_ tone when they heard it. Even though nearly an hour passed before the commander had met them on the _Normandy_ she hadn't said anything about what she and Anderson had discussed – whatever the truth might be, she wasn't sharing.

They picked up their pace as they headed into the ward, avoiding the transit terminal – _no time for mechanical difficulties_, Kaidan knew. Especially the kind that could be caused by a grenade tossed by another of Saren's agents delighted to find them isolated and away from the crowds. "So long as Saren still cares to hide his treachery from the Council his operatives won't attack in open spaces filled with civilians," Shepard had reasoned. She still ordered Williams to check their six every fifteen paces or so, just in case. Three fully armed and armored marines would draw attention any time, especially in a heavily trafficked ward in the middle of the day, but they strode past the gasps and stares. They kept their gazes fixed firmly in front of them, avoiding eye contact except for a few warning glares Shepard threw out at the occasional curious civilian who came too close to her. The dozen or so C-Sec officers of varying species that they passed along the way seemed to recognize them, even giving them a respectful nod – and staying out of their way.

The med clinic was at the far end of the main hall from where they had been the night before – it's door curiously closed for a free clinic during core business hours. Shepard slowed, glancing around at the thinning crowd before turning her _I-have-a-bad-feeling-about-this_ frown on Williams and Kaidan. They both nodded, unholstering their weapons as she pressed the control to open the door.

"I didn't tell anyone!" a human woman's voice cried out. "I swear!"

The doctor, a flame-haired human woman, was encircled by half a dozen armed thugs closing in on her with their guns drawn. "That was smart, Doc," snarled the one closest to her, brandishing the biggest pistol of them all. "Now if Garrus comes around you stay smart. Keep your mouth shut, or we'll –" The swish of the doors sliding shut caused his head to snap around to where Shepard, Williams and Kaidan stood. "Who are you?" he yelled, pointing his pistol at Shepard.

All three marines were still reaching for their weapons when a noise on their right – caused by a crouching Turian in a C-Sec uniform in the far corner of the waiting room – drew the gunmen's attention to them. The one closest to the doctor grabbed her, jamming his pistol under her jaw, but he barely had time to shout a threat in Shepard's direction before a single shot drilled him in the center of his forehead. He slumped to the floor, his gun sliding from his hands as Garrus stepped out from his cover, shifting his pistol's aim to the next closest thug. The second gunman reached for the doctor – but was cut down by a burst from Williams' assault rifle. Shepard and Kaidan quickly picked off the remaining thugs as they ran for cover – the echo of their shots faded into a silence broken only by the short, ragged breaths of the doctor.

Garrus turned towards her. "Dr. Michel, are you hurt?"

"No, I'm okay," she said, shaking her head and turning away from the sight of a body on the floor nearby.

"Who were those men?" Shepard asked, turning the body over onto its' back with her foot. "Why were they threatening you?"

The doctor took a long, deep breath. "They work for Fist. They wanted to shut me up, keep me from telling Garrus about the Quarian."

"Quarian?" Shepard asked sharply, half a beat before Garrus.

Dr. Michel told her story quickly – a Quarian had come into the clinic a few days ago suffering from a gunshot wound. She hadn't said how she'd been injured, but she seemed to be on the run, and scared. She told the doctor she wanted to trade information with the Shadow Broker in exchange for her safety, so the doctor had referred to the closest one of his many agents on the Citadel – Fist, the owner of Chora's Den.

"Not anymore," Garrus said grimly. "Now he works for Saren, and the Shadow Broker isn't too happy about it."

The doctor shook her head sadly. "Fist betrayed the Shadow Broker? That's stupid, even for him."

"That Quarian must have something Saren wants – something worth crossing the Shadow Broker to get," Garrus growled, turning towards Shepard.

She nodded in agreement. "Evidence. Did the Quarian mention anything about Saren?" Shepard asked the doctor in a gentler tone. "Or the Geth?"

"She did," Michel nodded, excited in spite of her confusion. "The information she was going to trade. She said it had something to do with the Geth."

"Do we have any idea where this Quarian is now?" Shepard asked, frowning down at the nearest body.

"She went to see Fist," Michel sighed. "That's as much as I know."

The door to the clinic swished open again, revealing a squadron-sized tactical team of C-Sec officers who immediately charged forward, weapons drawn. _This whole station's got to be bristling with weapons sensors_, Kaidan realized, as the three marines automatically raised their hands to show no hostile intent while Garrus, his hands also in the air, advanced towards his colleagues and began to explain the situation. _If C-Sec's going to come running every time they get an alert we're going to have to move fast to stay ahead._

Garrus' conversation with the lead officer, a human, was short – the squad lowered their weapons and began checking out the bodies on the floor. "I"ll need to take all of you down to our sector HQ for questioning," Garrus said, turning back towards Michel and the marines. "It's co-located with the C-Sec Academy, just one level down."

"We don't have time for that!" Williams snapped. "We need –"

Shepard's head whipped around, fixing the younger woman with a sharp, _Shut-it!_ gaze. Williams clamped her teeth together, glaring at Garrus, but gave a single, sharp nod. "Lead the way, officer," Shepard said calmly, turning back to Garrus. His eyes lingered on Williams for a moment before pivoting around crisply and striding quickly towards the door.

They moved quickly and silently through the corridors, attracting no more attention than they had before despite the sound of gunfire and swarm of C-Sec officers which had just filled the air. Garrus slowed as they started down a long, narrow stairway. "Sorry for the line about taking you in for questioning," he said quietly as he moved into position next to Shepard, "But we needed to get out of there before any of my superior officers could show up. You'd have been buried under paperwork for at least a week to get your weapons back."

"Isn't Chora's Den that way?" the commander asked, jerking a thumb over her shoulder.

"I thought we might make a quick stop to pick up a little extra help," Garrus said.

Behind them, Williams snorted. "What do you mean, 'we?'"

Garrus kept his gaze on the commander. "This is your show, Shepard. But I want to bring Saren down as much as you do. You need someone who knows the Citadel. Someone who can help you track down this Quarian without getting her or you into more trouble than you're already in."

"You're a Turian," Shepard said cautiously. "Why do you want to bring Saren down?"

"I couldn't find the proof I needed in my investigation. But I knew what was really going on," Garrus hissed, stopping suddenly. "Saren's a traitor to the Council, and a disgrace to my people!"

Shepard also came to a halt, glancing back at Williams – who shook her head vehemently – and Kaidan, who gave her an _It's-your-call_ shrug. "Sold," Shepard said firmly, turning back to the Turian.

"Thanks, Commander," Garrus said, his facial bones fluttering. He resumed his descent of the stairs, the bounce in his gait noticeably higher. "After the incident at Chora's Den last night we detained a Krogan bounty hunter that the security guards said had just been in there, threatening to kill Fist."

"Yeah," Kaidan said, "We saw him before we left."

"We kept him overnight for questioning," Garrus continued as they reached the bottom of the stairs, "But without any additional evidence we'll have to let him go by noon." A nondescript set of double doors, topped by the C-Sec crest, was tucked into the corner of the empty room the stairs had led them to.

Shepard glanced down at the data display on her armor's left wrist. "That's ten minutes from now."

"I'll go inside with Dr. Michel and hand her over to the watch captain," Garrus said, waving the doctor over towards the doors. "You three stay out here and wait for Wrex."

Williams barely waited for the doors to close behind Garrus and the doctor before turning to Shepard. "Are you sure having a Turian along is a good idea, Commander? And a Krogan?"

"If those two guys we had to deal with last night are any indication, we're going to need all the help we can get," Shepard said, looking around them. A couple of stand-alone extranet terminals were gathering dust in one corner, and a pile of shuttle parts painted with the C-Sec crest filled the far end of the room.

Kaidan's skin tingled with the memory of the force of the biotic blast Shepard had unleashed on the second of their attackers. "Commander, can I ask – "

"You can ask me anything you want, Alenko," she cut in. "Doesn't mean you'll get an answer," she added with a slight grin, "But you can ask."

"Ah, yes ma'am," he said, suddenly feeling very warm under his armor. "It's just that I don't remember seeing you use biotics before last night, ma'am. Not on Eden Prime, at least."

She nodded affirmatively. "I just got the implants a few years ago, so I'm still getting used to them. Some days it's just easier to stick with what I know," she said, laying one hand on the butt of her pistol.

"If it was good enough to get you through the Blitz," Williams shrugged, "It should be good enough to make you a Spectre, right?"

Shepard gave Williams a half-nod, frowning at the floor."Commander," Kaidan started slowly, "What Harkin said about Captain Anderson…is it true?"

Shepard sighed, moving further away from the doors. "Close enough." Kaidan and Williams followed, stepping closer to her so she could speak softly. "He wasn't ever actually inducted into the Spectres – just nominated, and then paired together with Saren for a mission so they could evaluate him."

"Like you with Nihlus," Williams nodded.

"Yes," the commander said grimly. "According to the captain, Saren completed the mission by setting off an explosion that killed their target…and 500 civilians at the same time. When the reports were in and the Council was briefed, Saren shifted the blame to Anderson. The invitation to join the Spectres was rescinded."

Kaidan shook his head. "And the Captain's never forgiven him for it."  
"Never forgotten, certainly," Shepard spat. "Forgiven…" She shook her head, too, a flicker of uncertainty clouding her face. "I don't know."

_She's worried_, Kaidan realized, watching her usual impassive and impervious expression slip back into place. _Has been all day._ _Worried we've gotten caught up in some personal vendetta Anderson's been carrying around for years_. She didn't seem at all concerned about herself – he was starting to wonder if she ever was – but something had her chewing over her thoughts like a dried-out piece of mess hall chicken. _If the captain pushes this too far it could end his career – if it hasn't already. _A small but sharp pain pierced his chest as the looks that had passed between Shepard and Anderson earlier replayed in his mind. _He means a lot to her…and she means a lot to him_. His breath caught as the pain spread. _I wonder –_

"Whatever happens you two were just following my orders." Shepard's voice cut into the silence suddenly, causing Kaidan to jump a little in surprise. "Got it?"

Williams frowned. "Commander, we're here –"

"That's an order, too, Chief," Shepard said sharply, her gaze equally hard.

_She's worried about us_. The pain in his chest faded. "Aye aye, ma'am," he replied quietly. Williams' frown deepened into a scowl, but she still gave the commander a slow nod.

Shepard looked as if she was about to say something else when the doors to the C-Sec facility slid open behind them, admitting a human officer and a scarred Krogan into the room. "I don't take orders from you," the Krogan snarled as the officer handed over an assault rifle.

"This is your only warning, Wrex," the officer replied.

Wrex let out a grunt that sounded like it was meant to be a laugh. "You should warn Fist. I will kill him."

"Do you want me to arrest you?" the officer sighed.

Wrex grinned, his scars pulling into a chilling curve. "I want you to try."

"Go on. Get out of here!" the officer snapped, turning on his heel and striding back through the doors. Shepard squared her shoulders and took a step towards Wrex as he locked his assault rifle into its place on his armor.

"Do I know you, human?" he grumbled, turning his head enough to glare at her with one red eye.

"My name's Shepard," she said calmly. "I'm going after Fist. Thought you might want to come along."

Wrex's head came all the way around. "Shepard? Commander Shepard?" She crossed her arms over her chest and gave him a single, short nod. "I've heard a lot about you," he said, moving slowly towards her. The doors slid open again – Garrus marched through them, alone. "We're both warriors, Shepard. Out of respect, I'll give you fair warning. I'm going to kill Fist."

"You have a contract?" Shepard asked. The Krogan nodded. "Fine," she said flatly. Kaidan shot a cautious glance at her, but stayed silent. "As long as I get what I need first, you can get what you want after that." Wrex let out a grunt, eyeing the commander suspiciously.

"Fist knows you're coming," Garrus added, coming alongside Shepard. "We'll have a better chance if we all work together."

The Krogan nodded slowly, his eyes still fixed on Shepard. "My people have a saying: Seek the enemy of your enemy and you will find a friend," he rumbled.

"We've a got a saying like that, too," Shepard said, nodding.

"Good," Wrex barked, reaching back and taking hold of his assault rifle. "Let's go. I hate to keep Fist waiting."

* * *

"Eden Prime was a major victory!" Saren's voice echoed through the atrium atop the Citadel Tower. The Council members stared down at their consoles, shoulders slumped as even the constant low hum of chatter from the bureaucrats scattered throughout the atrium's upper levels faded into silence. "The beacon has brought us one step closer to finding the Conduit."

The Turian Councilor let out a deep sigh as the recording continued to play. "And one step closer to the return of the Reapers," a voice that sounded female purred in reply. The Asari Councilor seemed to stir, but did not lift her gaze from her console.

Ambassador Udina barely allowed the sound of the words to fade before stepping forward on the speaker's platform, pointing an accusatory hand towards the Council. "You wanted proof," he said crowed, "There it is."

"This evidence is irrefutable, Ambassador", the Turian Councilor growled, as Udina released the tight hold he'd kept on a satisfied smirk. "Saren will be stripped of his Spectre status and all efforts will be made to bring him in to answer for his crimes."

The Asari Councilor looked up from her console, a strange sadness darkening her face. "I recognize the other voice," she said slowly. "The one speaking with Saren. Matriarch Benezia." She frowned, glancing around at the thin audience with obvious gratitude that this session, like the one before, was closed and confidential.

Standing a few paces behind the Ambassador, Shepard lifted her head but did not otherwise disturb the at-ease position she stood in. "Who is she?"

"Matriarchs are powerful asari who have entered the final stage of their lives," the Councilor said. "Revered for their wisdom and experience they serve as guides and mentors to my people." From where he stood just behind the commander, Kaidan could see her smile flatten out a bit into an _I-knew-that_ grimace, but she kept her silence. "Matriarch Benezia is a powerful biotic, and she had many followers. She will make a formidable ally for Saren," the Councilor finished quickly. Shepard nodded pensively, her polite smile back in place.

"I'm more interested in the Reapers," the Salarian Councilor cut in, his first words since the meeting began. "What do you know about them?"

Captain Anderson stirred from where he stood between Shepard the ambassador, arms crossed and fingers tapping against his arm impatiently. "Only what was extracted from the Geth's memory core," he said, nodding at the Quarian woman next to Shepard as he spoke. Kaidan stood behind them, with Chief Williams and the two others they'd picked up along the way, Garrus and Wrex. Shepard and her team had found the Quarian just in time to dispatch the team of bounty hunters Saren's allies had sent to kidnap her and ensure her evidence against the Spectre was never seen. Instead, Tali'Zorah nar Rayya had just played for the Council the partial audio recording of Saren's conversation with this Matriarch Benezia about their victory on Eden Prime, taken from a disabled Geth with the accuracy and skill that only one of the species that had created the Geth would have. "The Reapers were an ancient race of machines that wiped out the Protheans," Anderson continued. "Then they vanished."

"The Geth reportedly believe the Reapers are gods," Shepard added carefully, "And that Saren is the prophet for their return."

Anderson nodded enthusiastically. "We think the Conduit is the key to their return. Saren's searching for it. That's why he attached Eden Prime," he finished, balling one hand into a fist and slapping it into his other palm for emphasis.

The Salarian Councilor's eyes narrowed. "Do we even know what this Conduit is?"

"Saren believes it can bring back the Reapers," Shepard said flatly. "That's bad enough."

"Listen to what you're saying!" the Turian Councilor snorted. "Saren wants to bring back the machines that wiped out all life in the galaxy? Impossible. It has to be." The Councilor's voice rose as his facial bones fluttered angrily. "Where did the Reapers go? Why did they vanish?" Shepard dropped her head, squeezing her eyes shut for a long moment – _she can't get that vision out of her head, _he frowned._ Even if she could, she wouldn't._ "How come we haven't found any trace of their existence? If they were real we'd have found something!" Confident no one was looking at him, Kaidan allowed himself a small shake of his head. _She knows the answers to all these questions must be in there._

Shepard let out a long breath. "I tried to warn you about Saren and you refused to face the truth," she said tightly. "Don't make the same mistake again."

"This is different," the Asari Councilor said gently, sensing Shepard's irritation. "You've proved Saren betrayed the Council. We all agree he's using the Geth to search for the Conduit, but we don't really know why."

"The Reapers are obviously just a myth, Commander," the Salarian Councilor sniffed, waving a hand dismissively. "A convenient lie to cover Saren's true purpose. A legend he is using to bend the Geth to his will."

"It doesn't matter whether we believe it or not," Shepard snapped, color rising in her cheeks. "What matters is that Saren and the Geth seem to believe it, and what that belief will drive them to do." The Salarian Councilor frowned, but then seemed to give her a slight nod.

The Turian Councilor caught sight of his colleague's gesture and shook his head. "Saren is a rogue agent on the run for his life," he rasped. "He no longer has the rights or resources of a Spectre."

"That's not good enough!" Ambassador Udina shouted, taking a step towards the edge of the platform to draw the Councilors' gaze back to him. "You know he's hiding somewhere in the Traverse. Send your fleet in!"

"A fleet cannot track down one man," the Salarian Councilor said tersely.

"A Citadel fleet could secure the entire region," Udina growled in reply. "Keep the Geth from attaching any more of our colonies."

"Or it could trigger a war with the Terminus Systems!" snarled the Turian Councilor. "We won't be dragged into a galactic confrontation over a few dozen human colonies!" (check gesture)

Shepard shook her head. "So you'll do nothing?" Kaidan could see the commander clenching her hands together behind her back so tightly her knuckles and the tips of her fingers were white, as if otherwise they would rip her head open in an effort to show the Council the vision in her mind.

"Shepard's right," Udina barked. "I'm sick of this Council and its anti-human bull-"

"Ambassador!" the Asari Councilor exclaimed, holding up one hand to calm Udina and another to preempt any retort from her Turian counterpart. "There is…another solution," she said slowly. "A way to stop Saren that does not require fleets or armies." Kaidan saw Shepard's chin come up, her shoulders suddenly squarer and her back straighter than a moment before.

The Turian Councilor shook his head vehemently. "No!" he hissed. "It's too soon! Humanity is not ready for the responsibilities that come with joining the Spectres."

"I faced the Geth on Eden Prime and exposed Saren for a traitor," Shepard shot back calmly. "What more do you want me to do?"

Check vid for sequence of Council gestures, touches of consoles. Asari, then Turian, then Salarian.

"Commander Shepard – step forward," the Asari Councilor said. Shepard hesitated, glancing over at Anderson – he nodded, giving her a wistful smile that collapsed the moment she turned away. As she approached the edge of the platform the buzz of a murmuring crowd began to fill the chamber. She glanced up at the open walkways lining either side of the chamber, quickly filling with the few dozen staffers allowed inside a closed Council session. Kaidan shot an indignant look at one human who actually leaned over a railing and pointed excitedly at Shepard but if she saw the gesture she ignored it, settling her gaze on the Asari Councilor. Even Udina took a step back to stand a few feet behind her. "It is the decision of the Council that you be granted all the rights and privileges of the Special Tactics and Reconnaissance branch of the Citadel," the Councilor said solemnly.

"Spectres are not trained, but chosen," the Salarian Councilor intoned with the sound of someone picking up their part of a well-worn speech. "Individuals forged in the fire of service and battle; whose actions elevate them above the rank and file."

The Asari Councilor barely waited a breath after the Salarian had finished before continuing. "Spectres are an ideal, a symbol. The embodiment of courage, self-reliance, and determination. They are the right hand of the Council, instruments of our will." Kaidan thought for a moment he saw Shepard's head tilt to her right and her shoulders stir, but a blink of his eyes later all seemed as it had been before.

"Spectres bear a great burden," the Turian Councilor said grudgingly, tossing a halfhearted glare at his Asari counterpart. "They are protectors of galactic peace, both our first and last line of defense. The safety of the galaxy is in their hands."

"You are the first human Spectre, Commander," the Asari Councilor added, her voice faster and more even now that the speech was over. "This is a great accomplishment for you and your entire species."

Despite the haughty and pretentious air lingering in every word the Councilors had said Shepard seemed genuinely moved rather than cynical, or even skeptical. "I'm honored, Councilor," she replied softly, bowing her head respectfully.

"So, we're sending you into the Traverse after Saren," the Salarian Councilor sniffed. "He's a fugitive from justice, so you are authorized to use any means necessary to apprehend or eliminate him."

Kaidan saw each Councilor's eyes watch Shepard closely for any sign of hesitation, but she nodded immediately. "Any leads?"

"We will forward any relevant files to Ambassador Udina," the Asari Councilor said quickly. "This meeting of the Council is adjourned." With that, all three turned away and walked briskly through the small doors on either side of their dais, leaving Shepard standing alone at the edge of the platform. A roar of dozens of conversations burst forth from the spectators around and above her. She seemed startled for a moment, looking up at the crowds with trepidation as if the meaning of what had just happened was only beginning to sink in – but then the same patiently exasperated smirk Kaidan had seen her give the audience she'd attracted back at Fleet HQ dawned on her face, and she pivoted around and strode back towards the captain with a laugh and a shake of her head.

Anderson stepped forward to meet her with his hand extended, grinning from ear to ear. "Congratulations, Commander," he said warmly as she took his hand. They held each other's grasp a moment longer than they needed to, eyes locked on each other, before pulling back and turning to face the others.

"We've got a lot of work to do, Shepard," Udina muttered unhappily, oblivious to her exchange with the captain. "You're going to need a ship, a crew, supplies…"

"You'll get access to special equipment and training now," Anderson added, ignoring the ambassador. "And –"

"Anderson," Udina snapped suddenly, "Come with me. I'll need your help to set this all up." Without waiting for an answer he turned on his heel and began striding away.

The captain sighed and shook his head. "Head on back to the _Normandy_," he muttered. "I'll –"

"Excuse me – Commander?" A wrinkled, wiry Salarian had come alongside the group with a scarred Turian behind him. Both sported the same sort of gear as Nihlus had – expensive and heavily upgraded. "If you would come with us, please," the Salarian asked politely but tersely. "There is some processing that needs to be done, after which the Council would like to speak with you in private."

Shepard swallowed, hard. "Of course," she nodded, her voice calmer than her eyes. She turned back towards the group, looking first at Garrus, Wrex and Tali. "Can I ask you three to hang out here for a while?" Each nodded quickly, then moved off towards some small garden areas on the lower levels of the atrium. Shepard shifted her gaze to Williams, then to Kaidan, and finally to the captain. "I, uh…I'll see you guys back on the _Normandy_," she said softly, waiting for a short, single nod of acknowledgement from Anderson before turning away and following the other Spectres to the other side of the atrium and through a small doorway near the edge of the Council platform.

* * *

"13.8…20.1…those bastards changed the drag settings!" Joker exclaimed, shaking his head while his hands flew over the _Normandy_'s helm controls.

Kaidan looked over from where he stood at a weapons panel, running his own set of checks. "Nothing you can't fix, I presume?"

"Please," Joker snorted, hands never pausing in their movements. "You'd actually have to understand these systems to really mess them up. I'm surprised those morons from DEVCOM even figured out how to open the airlock." DEVCOM had finished their evaluation of the _Normandy_ earlier that day and released the ship back to the crew. Lieutenant Commander Pressley had barely given them time to stow their gear before he had them at work, checking all the _Normandy_'s systems for anything DEVCOM might have messed up. Kaidan and Williams had pitched in upon returning from the Citadel Tower, but Captain Anderson had merely told Pressley to keep it up before disappearing into the comm center with the ambassador. Nearly four hours later, they still hadn't emerged.

Footsteps echoed on the deck – Pressley came up behind Joker's chair, his face tense as he tapped away on a datapad. "Still no sign of the commander?"

"No, sir," Kaidan and Joker said together. Pressley sighed, frowning out the small windows at the empty docking platform. "I'll call down to Citadel Control again to see if she's left the Tower yet, sir," Joker sighed.

"Good," Pressley nodded. "Let me know what they say."

Kaidan took a few steps closer to Joker as Pressley strode away. "What's gotten into him?" he asked quietly.

"Everybody's been jumpy ever since word that Shepard got made a Spectre came in," Joker shrugged. "We're supposed to get slotted into the 63rd Scout Flotilla now that DEVCOM's given us their blessing, but those orders haven't come in yet. People are starting to wonder if we're going to get assigned to go with Shepard after Saren and the Geth."

Kaidan nodded, remembering the nervous questions directed at Williams and he when they'd come back on board about the meeting with the Council. "How are they handling it?"

"Half of them are excited. The other half had to go change their pants," Joker replied cheerfully, leaving no doubt which faction he was in. "I –" The sight of a few marines tramping down the deck towards the airlock carrying duffel bags and a few hardcases stopped Joker cold. He blinked at them for a moment, then whirled around and reached for the comm controls. "Citadel Control, this is _SSV Normandy_."

"_SSV Normandy_, this is Citadel Control," a tired-sounding female voice answered. "What is it now?"

"Ah…just checking in again to see if Commander Shepard has left the Citadel Tower yet," Joker said cautiously.

The woman sighed. "One moment, _Normandy_." The comm clicked as she muted the channel on her end.

"Who do you think is leaving?" Kaidan asked softly, trying to ignore the chill creeping through him. The only crewmembers who would have that much stuff on a ship as small as the _Normandy_ would be officers with private quarters. If he remembered the ship's layout correctly, there were only five – the captain, the XO, the chief engineer and navigator, and the doctor.

Joker shook his head sadly. "It's gotta be Shepard," he muttered. "She's a Spectre now – she belongs to them." Kaidan clenched his hands into fists, digging his nails into his palms to keep himself calm. "Wonder if they'll even let her come say goodbye –"

"_SSV Normandy_, this is Citadel Control. Commander Shepard left the Citadel Tower a half hour ago and should be on her way to your fleet headquarters facilities," the woman's voice said briskly. "Citadel Control out." The comm beeped again and fell silent.

Kaidan's heart leapt into his throat. "Maybe it's not her," he coughed.

"She could be coming to tender her resignation from the Alliance," Joker countered sharply. "Or they could be reassigning her to –"

The last marine in the luggage caravan glanced over at them as he turned into the airlock, carrying a folded up shoji screen. Kaidan reached out and grabbed Joker's shoulder, ignoring the grunted 'Ow!' from the pilot. "It's the captain," he whispered.

Joker frowned. "What?"

"I saw that –" Kaidan pointed at the screen – "In the captain's quarters." He shook his head. "It's –"

"May I have everyone's attention, please," Captain Anderson's voice echoed out suddenly from the ship's comm system. "This is Captain Anderson." Kaidan released his hold on Joker's shoulder, dropping into the nearest chair. "As I'm sure you are all aware, earlier today Commander Shepard became the first human to join the Special Tactics and Reconnaissance branch of the Citadel. This is a great honor for the commander, for the Alliance, and for all of humanity. It is also a great responsibility. The task she's been given, to hunt down and destroy the forces that attacked Eden Prime, is a difficult one. She can't succeed if she doesn't have the best ship and crew in the Alliance backing her up." Down in the bullpen Kaidan saw some of the junior officers exchanging happy glances. "To that end," the captain continued, clearing his throat, "Effective immediately, Commander Shepard is taking over as commanding officer of the _Normandy_." The self-congratulatory smiles vanished, replaced by slack, confused stares. "I can think of no better hands to leave you in than hers. It has been my privilege to serve as your captain, but you have a more important mission now. If you do your jobs to the best of your ability I know that you will make all of humanity proud. Thank you, and good hunting."

A stunned silence stretched through the command deck as the captain's voice faded away. Kaidan's two junior officers glanced up at him from their seats in the bullpen, bewildered. Next to him, Joker swore under his breath and shook his head. Even Pressley was staring blankly at his datapad. Kaidan knew he should be as filled with shock as everyone else, but all he could feel was his heart racing. _She's coming back_.

The stillness was finally broken when the doors to the comm center swished open. Ambassador Udina strode onto the deck, grinning a bit too widely for the somber mood around him. The captain emerged a few steps behind, his bearing as normal as if he'd just announced the lunch menu rather than his resignation. Udina said a few words to a half-listening Anderson but didn't seem to care whether they were heard or not – as soon as he'd finished speaking he walked away, moving quickly down the deck and out of the airlock without saying anything more.

Pressley approached the captain first – still at the other end of the deck in the helm, Kaidan couldn't hear what was said, but he could see the captain nod gratefully and manage a tight smile. More officers and crew approached Anderson as he slowly made his way through the combat information center, some thanking the captain and wishing him luck while others simply saluted. Adams and Dr. Chakwas both came rushing through the doors from the lower decks, followed by several other crewmembers from down below, including Williams. The captain took a few moments to speak with everyone, to at least exchange salutes and wishes for good luck. He spoke at greater length with those who had served with him before, such as the doctor, placing a reassuring hand on her shoulder as they said their goodbyes. It was several minutes before he passed through the bullpen and came towards the helm. Kaidan, still standing, saluted the captain while Joker pushed himself to his feet, grasping the back of his chair for support with one hand while he saluted Anderson with the other. "Alenko – Joker," the captain replied, saluting them quickly in return. "You make sure you bring this ship back in one piece."

"Yes, sir," Joker said softly.

"No sarcastic comment or witty retort, Joker?" Anderson inquired, chuckling gently. "I must admit I'm a little disappointed."

Joker scowled. "Yeah, well, once the air recycling system gets rid of the smell Udina left behind I'll be able to come up with something."

Anderson laughed, loud and long. "Keep it up, Joker," the captain finally said once he'd calmed down. "She likes a good laugh." He drew in a long breath, looking back down the deck towards the many crewmembers who still lingered in the CIC, reluctant to leave until he was gone. "She'll need it."

"What's going to happen to you, sir?" Kaidan asked quietly.

"Not sure yet," Anderson sighed. "I'd hope I could get the captain's chair of another ship, but that door may be closed." He shot a glare out the viewports looking over the docking platform – a glance over his shoulder showed Kaidan the figure of Ambassador Udina, unmistakable in his bright white suit, tapping a foot impatiently as he waited for the elevator to arrive. "I've been recommending for years that the Alliance should establish a preparatory training program for potential Spectres," he added, "But they never listened to me. Maybe if she brings it up –" The captain broke off, shaking his head. "Don't you worry about me – your mission to find Saren is more important."

"Was this your idea, sir?" Joker asked quickly.

"Yes," the captain answered before Joker had barely finished asking the question. "Shepard's going to need a ship and a crew she can command to go wherever she needs to go and do whatever needs to be done. She can't have a superior officer looking over her shoulder. Dealing with the Council will frustrate her enough." He cleared his throat, his eyes snapping again to the figure on the docking platform. "This ship is the fastest in the fleet, and no other ship has the stealth capabilities the _Normandy_ does. She already knows the ship and the crew, so this is the logical choice."

Something in the captain's voice wasn't convincing Kaidan. "Sir – did the ambassador –"

"What the ambassador may or may not have done is not your concern, Lieutenant," Anderson snapped.

Kaidan blushed, chastened. "Yes, sir," he mumbled.

"Sir," Joker said cautiously, "Citadel Control said the commander had left the Tower –" He glanced at a chrono display – "Nearly an hour ago, now, but she's not here yet. Any idea when –"

"She'll be a little while longer," the captain cut in. "She has certain errands she always runs before she leaves on a mission, and then the Ambassador and I need a few minutes of her time." He frowned down at the deck. "I wouldn't look for her for at least two more hours."

Kaidan nodded. He still has to say his goodbyes to her. "It's been a pleasure serving with you, Captain," he said, snapping into a salute.

"And you, Lieutenant," the captain said, replicating the gesture as Joker did the same. Anderson nodded at both of them, then turned and headed towards the airlock as Joker slowly sat back down. Suddenly he stopped and looked back at Kaidan, his eyes strangely soft. "Take care of her," he said quietly.

Kaidan had the creeping sensation that the captain wasn't referring just to the _Normandy_. "We will, sir." The captain gave him another nod, topped with an almost regretful smile – then turned on his heel and marched away.

After the inner airlock doors closed behind the captain and the whirring sound of the decontamination systems began, Pressley cleared his throat loudly and moved towards the head of the crowd still gathered in the CIC. "Back to work, everyone," he said sharply. "I don't want to see the look on the commander's face if we're not ready to go when she is." The crew began drifting slowly back towards their posts or the stairs to the lower decks.

"Logged," the Normandy's VI said pleasantly into the silence, "The Commanding Officer is ashore. XO Shepard has the deck."

"We'll have to get that reprogrammed. Again," Pressley muttered, giving his datapad a hard tap.

Kaidan dropped into his chair as Joker swiveled around, grumbling. "The captain survives a hundred battles, and then gets taken down by backroom politics." Shaking his head, Kaidan forced his eyes to focus on his display screens – he didn't want to see a mad Shepard, either.

It was nearly three hours later before the clanking of the outer airlock door echoed through the air. "Attention on deck!" Pressley said sharply, moving quickly up the deck towards the airlock's outer inner doors. Kaidan scrambled up and out of his seat and moved to stand at attention near the doors as they slowly began to open.

She'd changed her armor – the dull grey, relatively chunky N7 armor was gone, replaced with a sleeker, more form-fitting armor bearing an old-style green camoflauge pattern and gleaming with plating and shield upgrades. As the doors slid further apart he saw she was also sporting a new pistol on her left hip, larger and looking powerful enough to put a bullet clean through the _Normandy_'s hull.

"Ten-hut!" Pressley called out, drawing himself up into a crisp salute. "Welcome back aboard, Commander. I hope you'll find –" His voice faltered at the sight of a tall, well-armed and armored Krogan stepping onto the deck just behind Shepard.

Shepard returned his salute with a calm smile. "I'm sorry I wasn't able to let you know about this in advance, Lieutenant Commander," she said smoothly, "But we'll be having a few extra guests joining us for the duration of this mission." The Turian C-Sec officer, Garrus, appeared next to Wrex, followed by the Quarian whose evidence had finally won over the Council.

"Yes – yes, ma'am," Pressley stammered, staring at Tali as if he'd never seen a Quarian before – which, Kaidan thought, he probably hadn't. "I presume this has been cleared by Admiral Hackett?"

"Yes, if for no other reason than to get the material command's assistance procuring non-human rations," Shepard said, waving her three guests past her and into the bullpen. "They should arrive within the hour." Pressley nodded nervously as Garrus moved to stand next to him. "Lieutenant Moretti!" Shepard called out. "There should be room in the quarters down on the engineering deck for our guests," she said when the young man drew near. "See that they're settled in and provided with anything they need." The lieutenant gave her a shaky salute, then started slowly down the deck with Wrex, Garrus, and Tali in tow. "How close are we to being ready to leave, Pressley?" Shepard asked pleasantly, turning back to him.

"Nearly there, Commander," he replied quickly, tearing his gaze away from the retreating three aliens. "We've had a few problems to fix, but they weren't anything serious." Shepard nodded approvingly. "You, ah…you'll need to move your gear to the captain's quarters," he added in a lower voice.

Shepard nodded again. "Of course," she said softly, her smile fading. "I'd like to meet with the command staff in the comm center two hours from now."

"Yes, ma'am," Pressley said quickly. "All the systems should be checked out by then."

"Good," Shepard said, brightening. "Oh, we'll be expecting one more addition to the crew." Pressley gave her a nervous, _what-now?_ smile. "I told Admiral Hackett he'd have a mutiny on his hands if we deployed without a real live cook on board," she continued, smiling.

Pressley laughed. "Sounds good, ma'am. We'll see you in two hours." He saluted her, then headed back towards the CIC.

The commander's gaze followed him for a long moment then swept over the crew in the bullpen and the CIC, all studiously keeping their eyes on their display screens. She let out a deep breath and let her shoulders relaxed as she turned and moved slowly towards the helm. Kaidan straightened up in his seat as she came alongside. "You two doing alright?" she asked evenly.

"Fine, fine," Joker mumbled. "Just cleaning up DEVCOM's mess."

"Don't tell me they screwed up the drag settings," Shepard sighed. "They always do that." She shook her head, laughing, when Joker threw his hands up in the air as a reply. "The _Normandy_ will be ready to hit the relay in about two and a half hours, I trust?"

"We're good to go up here – just waiting on those slugs down in engineering to make sure this ship will actually go where I tell it to," Joker scoffed.

Shepard nodded, chuckling. "That would be good."

"It's good to have you back, ma'am," Joker added, turning halfway around in his chair to give her a small salute.

She crossed her arms over her chest, leaning back against Kaidan's chair while giving Joker a skeptical look. "Changed your mind already about having a Spectre on board, have you?" Kaidan forced himself to stare at his display screens.

"Well, you're not just any Spectre," Joker said slowly. "You're…you're you," he continued, actually starting to blush. "Ma'am."

Kaidan couldn't stop himself from looking up at Shepard, who promptly threw him a disbelieving grin before turning back to Joker. "Or is it really because I haven't yelled at you as much as the captain did? Yet."

"Is this a multiple choice exam?" Joker shot back.

"Just keep up the good work, Joker," the commander grinned, shaking her head and starting to walk away. Kaidan turned around in his chair to watch her go, seeing once again how every crewmember in the bullpen busied themselves with their display screens as if they wanted to avoid having to talk to her. _With everything that's happened in the last few days they're confused, shell-shocked, and more than a little afraid…both of the task we're facing and of her_. He felt pulled out of his seat and down the walkway, towards them and her – _if you just talk to her, just get to know her –_

Hearing his approach, she stopped in mid-stride and turned around. "Lieutenant?"

He hesitated – what the hell have I just done? – but then took a deep breath and stepped closer to her. "Commander…can I make a suggestion?" he asked in a quiet, low voice.

"Go ahead, Lieutenant," she replied in an equally muted voice, glancing around to see if anyone was listening in.

"I, uh, I was thinking it might be a good idea for you to take a few minutes and address the crew before we head out," he said quickly, before he could change his mind. "Between the attack on Eden Prime, Jenkins' death, your, ah, promotion to the Spectres, and now the Captain stepping aside I imagine they're a little stunned."

Shepard's eyes snapped up to look straight into his. "You think they're the only ones?"

His every nerve suddenly felt like it had been lit on fire. "No, ma'am," he choked out, twisting his hands together to try to get some feeling back in his body. "You don't strike me as the sort of CO who's big on speeches, but I think it would help settle them down," he said, still hearing a tremor in his voice. "Especially once word gets around about our guests."

"Do we have a problem here, Lieutenant?" she asked, her eyes still locked on his and her voice dangerously quiet.

"No, ma'am," he said firmly. "But it'll be a new and unfamiliar situation for a lot of the crew." He flicked his gaze over to Pressley, then back to her, seeing her eyes following his. "And not just the younger ones."

She gave him a single, slow nod. "I'll take it under advisement, Alenko." Her eyes shifted back to him, their expression gentler than it had been a moment before. "Thanks."

"You're welcome," he replied softly. "Ma'am." Shepard held his gaze a few moments longer before moving slowly away, taking care to give a reassuring smile to any crewmember who dared to look up at her as she passed. It wasn't until she'd passed through the doors to the lower decks that Kaidan finally turned away and headed back towards the helm. Joker's head craned around, his eyebrows arched and a inquisitive grin on his face as Kaidan dropped back into his chair. "What?" Kaidan shrugged, staring determinedly at his display screens.

"Nothing," Joker chirped. "Nothing at all."


	4. Relics

Chapter 4 – Relics

"We have three potential leads on Saren," Shepard said, bringing up the comm center's holodisplay with a wave of her hand. "Two are reported but unconfirmed Geth sightings – one near the human colony on Feros and one in the space around Noveria." A map of the galaxy appeared on the display, dossiers describing each planet appearing as she spoke their names. Kaidan and the other officers seated around the room craned their necks to get a better look at their eventual destinations. "The corporation sponsoring the Feros colony says they've been out of contact for nearly a day, but they claim it's just a routine communication problem," Shepard said skeptically. "Noveria's board of administrators declined the Alliance's request for information, citing the privacy rights of the client corporations using Noverian facilities for their research."

"Sounds like we're going to have to get shareholder approval just to land," Pressley muttered.

"We might have had to," Shepard nodded. "But Spectres have carte blanche to go anywhere and take any action they might deem necessary in any colony that recognizes Council authority or any facility owned or operated by a company that's incorporated under Council law." She crossed her arms over her chest and grinned. "I double-checked with OTJAG and Colonial Affairs and these exemptions apply to any vessel and crew assisting the Spectre in their mission."

Joker lifted a hand. "Does that include New Vegas Pleasure Dome on Terra Nova?"

Shepard chuckled, shaking her head. "If we take down Saren we'll find out." Joker grinned – Williams, sitting next to him, reached over and gave him a light smack on the back of his head. The commander waved her hand again – the holodisplays of Feros and Noveria vanished. "The third lead is the daughter of Saren's ally, this Matriarch Benezia." Another gesture produced an image of a young Asari. Next to it, what appeared to be a relatively short biography began scrolling by. "Dr. Liara T'Soni. She's a scientist and archaeologist studying the Protheans. Based on her published research, she specializes in theories of their disappearance and extinction." A third screen, filled with text, appeared at a third flick of Shepard's hand.

"The Reapers," Kaidan breathed. The commander had opened the briefing with a quick summary of their mission: chase after Saren while he hunted for the Conduit until they could catch up to him and destroy him. She'd only lightly touched on the possibility that this Conduit might bring back a race of sentient machines responsible for the Prothean extinction, but the temperature in the comm center had still dropped by several degrees.

"She might be able to give us some hard evidence that they're more than just a Geth legend," Shepard said tightly. "Or tell us what the Conduit really is."

"If Saren doesn't shut her up permanently first," Wrex grumbled. He was standing at the back of the comm center near the doors leading out to CIC, with Tali and Garrus next to him.

The commander nodded. "Which is why I say we go after her now. She's just one person, so finding and securing her shouldn't take too long." A third planetary dossier materialized. "Her employers say she's at a dig site on Therum, in the Knossos system of the Artemis Tau cluster. It should take us about twelve hours to get there." She paused, quickly surveying the room for any signs of disagreement – seeing none, she moved away from the holodisplays to stand in the center of the room. "Meanwhile, Adams – I want you to work with Tali to try to develop a profile on that ship we saw on Eden Prime," she said. "It's not from any known Council race, but it's not Geth either."

"At least, no type of Geth ship we've seen before," Tali added cautiously.

"Go over every bit of data the we were able to grab before it flew off and try to figure out what it is," Shepard continued, nodding gratefully at Tali. "At least give me an idea of what its capabilities might be – weapons ports, shields and hull plating, fighter bays. If Saren's using it we'll probably find it when we find him."

Pressley shook his head. "That ship's at least ten times bigger than the _Normandy_. It'll rip us to shreds."

"I've no intention of slugging it out with that thing by ourselves," Shepard said quickly. "We'll use the stealth systems to hide, and if that fails I've got no problem turning tail and using that big drive core we're dragging around to run away."

Williams leaned forward in her chair. "There was also that signal the ship was putting out when it first arrived," she said, casting defiant glances at the more senior officers whose heads had swiveled towards her. "That noise the farmers described, the one they said made it impossible for them to think."

"Our scanners didn't pick up anything," Pressley grunted. Williams looked up at Shepard and gave her a _you-were-there_ shrug. Quiet, murmured conversations began to break out around the room as the commander frowned pensively and moved slowly back to the holodisplays, waving away the images of Therum and Dr. T'Soni with her left hand while bringing up a fuzzy image of the mysterious ship with her right. Kaidan sat back in his chair, remembering the deep, rumbling sound that had shaken the ground under his feet as the ship took off from the colony's spaceport. He could almost still feel it reverberating in his mind if he just closed his eyes and concentrated on the sound…

"I'm sorry," Joker's voice rang out, "But am I the only person in this room who thinks that thing looks like an overgrown squid?"

The room held still for a moment. Shepard tilted her head to one side, eyes narrowing as they studied the strange ship. "Code name 'Calamari' it is," she finally drawled, the corners of her mouth turning upwards into a smirk. Around the room the other officers all relaxed in their seats, smiling and chuckling, while the three non-humans looked at each other and shrugged. "Pressley – see if you can lay in a supply of some cocktail sauce for when we fry that thing."

"Yes, ma'am," he replied happily.

"Alright," Shepard said, closing down the holodisplay. "We've got thirty minutes before we need to be secure and aweigh. I suggest you take this time to call or write whoever you've got back home and to encourage those under your command to do the same." The brief feeling of levity evaporated. "As we get closer to Saren it's likely we'll have to cut down on unsecure, personal communications that could give away our location and intentions. I'll try to give everyone enough warning before imposing a blackout to send one last message, but I can't make any promises. So if you've got anything important you want to say to someone, go ahead and say it now. Dismissed."

Kaidan stood slowly, turning instinctively towards Shepard – but Pressley was already at her shoulder, holding up his datapad in front of her and gesturing at something on its screen. Stifling a sigh, Kaidan moved off towards the door, watching the three newest members of the crew going before him – Wrex marching ahead on his own, followed by a quietly chatting Garrus and Tali, then the rest of the human officers carefully staying a few steps behind.

"This is going to be fun!" Joker chortled as Kaidan came alongside. "I can't wait to see what this girl can really do!"

"I don't know," Kaidan replied, stepping through the doors into the hall that linked the comm center to the CIC. "This mission sounds pretty dangerous to me."

Joker let out an exasperated sigh. "You are such a downer, Alenko. Of course it's danger –" He stumbled suddenly, throwing his arms out – Kaidan reached over and grabbed his arm as gently as he could, holding onto Joker until he regained his balance. "Thanks," he muttered, glaring darkly at the floor as he pulled his arm away.

"No problem," Kaidan replied softly. He knew Joker wasn't ungrateful, just a little resentful that his condition – a brittle bone disease – made even basic physical movements like walking potentially dangerous. Between gene therapy and regular medications the syndrome had been controlled well enough to allow Joker to join the Alliance, but anyone who served with him quickly learned it was still a touchy subject. "Are you going to give your mother a call?"  
"And say what?" Joker said. "She knows I'm here. If she wants to know what we're up to she can get on the extranet just like everybody else."

Kaidan shook his head, laughing. His own mother would've pulled her hair out with a son like Joker. "She doesn't worry when you don't call?" he asked.

"I think she'd be more worried if I did," he shrugged as they passed through the doors into the CIC. "Anyhow, I've got jumps to plan. I'll see you later." Keeping one hand out so he could grab onto something if his balance faltered again, he shuffled forwards towards the helm. Kaidan surveyed the organized chaos around him for a long moment – officers staring at datapads and barking out orders while the crew rushed around from one station to the next, tapping furiously at the controls panels – then started edging towards the stairs leading to the lower decks. He'd already finished all the mission prep he could before the _Normandy_ actually departed, so the best use he could make of the time until then was to get out of everyone else's way.

"Hey, Alenko," a voice called out from behind him. Kaidan turned his head and saw Lieutenant Chun, one of Pressley's junior navigators, approaching him rapidly. "How was the briefing?"

"Fine," Kaidan said quickly. Shepard hadn't said the briefing was classified, but neither would she appreciate someone talking about things that weren't really theirs to say. "Just a rundown of the places we'll be heading. I'm sure Pressley will fill you in on the details."

Chun gave him a half-shrug – Kadain replied with a _can't-blame-you-for-trying_ grin. "Anyhow," Chun continued, "What'd you think of the commander's speech?"

"I thought it was good," Kaidan said. Just before she'd convened the meeting Shepard had come over the ship's comm system and addressed the crew, giving them a down and dirty summary of their orders – find Saren and his Geth and stop them. He didn't kid himself that she'd given the speech solely at his suggestion. She was far too experienced not to have planned to address the crew at some point. But there had been no cheerleading or hollow-sounding optimism, only solid statements of fact that the crew could wrap their arms around. _'This is going to be hard, but it's the most important mission of our lives. Do your jobs as well as I know you can and we'll find a way to succeed.'_ There'd been no shortage of confident grins exchanged between the crew after she finished.

Lieutenant Chun nodded again. "Yeah, I suppose it was. I'm just used to CO's who can't stop listening to the sound of their own voice."

"That's not Shepard," Kaidan grinned.

"I guess not," the lieutenant chuckled. "Hey – you were with her that whole time on the Citadel," he added, stepping closer to Kaidan and lowering his voice. "What –"

"Chun!" Pressley's voice rang out through the CIC as he came striding out of the comm center. There was no sign of Shepard. "No time for chatting – we've got charts for systems you've probably never even heard of that need to be loaded." Chun followed quickly, giving Kaidan an apologetic shrug as he moved out of sight.

The crew deck was much quieter. Some vacuum-packed snacks and canned coffee had been set out in the mess area but they barely seemed to have been disturbed. A few other junior officers were clustered around the vidscreen in the Officers' Lounge – "Again," he heard the human male announcer's voice call out. "Galactic News Network sources on the Citadel are reporting that Commander Elizabeth Shepard, hero of the Battle of Elysium and the recent attack on Eden Prime, has been appointed by the Citadel Council as the first human Spectre. A Council spokesperson refused to confirm or deny –" Kaidan could feel the officers' heads turning away from the vidscreen to watch him as he passed by, but he kept his eyes staring straight ahead and didn't slow his step until he had to wait for the door to his quarters to slide open before heading inside.

_Yes, I was with her on the Citadel and in front of the Council_, he sighed, sitting down in front of the small computer resting on his equally small desk. _Yes, I was just in the briefing._ Its darkened screen beeped into life with a wave of his hand. _No, I don't know much more than you've already been told and even if I did I wouldn't jeopardize her confidence in me by telling you._ He tapped a few controls to connect to the Normandy's communications network, nodding his head in time with the familiar chimes as the link was established.

"Good afternoon, Lieutenant Alenko," a comm technician's voice said hurriedly. "There's a ten-minute wait for a vid relay right now –"

"Audio only is fine," Kaidan replied quickly.

The tech sighed in relief. "Just a second, then." His computer beeped again, then displayed the standard 'This communication may be monitored…' warning. "You're good to go, sir," the tech said.

"Thanks," Kaidan said, reaching out towards the array of numbers that had just appeared on his screen. Planet code…country code…area code…and finally their number. He heard one click, then two, and then the high-pitched tones of a ringing comm on the other end of the line. He waited, tapping a foot nervously. Finally, as he was about to end the call after fourteen rings with no answer, the line clicked into life. "Hello?" his mother's voice called out.

"Mom – hi," he said quickly. "It's Kaidan."

"Kaidan!" she exclaimed happily. "Oh, hold on, let me get your father –" Despite the soft thumps from her attempt to cover the transmitter Kaidan could still hear her shouting his father's name, and the distant echo of reply. "Okay, he's coming," she said, coming back on line. "Are you alright? We saw the reports about Eden Prime and the _Normandy_ and we were so wor-"

"Gave those jumped-up servbots a good ass-kicking, eh?" His father's question boomed through the air.

Kaidan swallowed a sigh, grateful for the lack of a video connection. "We chased them off, but the damage was already done." He stared down at the network's on/off indicator, happily blinking green, to keep away the memories of the blackened, disfigured husks the Geth had left behind.

His father grunted disbelievingly. "Still, they'll think twice before messing with humanity again."

"Let's hope so," Kaidan said quickly. "Anyhow, I can't talk long, we –" The sound of a door slamming echoed over the line, followed by muffled but angry voices.

"Um…" His mother coughed delicately. "Your brother and his wife are visiting this week."

"Oh." His brother, Kanjin, was three years older than Kaidan. After a turbulent on-again, off-again relationship he'd finally married his high-school sweetheart five years ago. Though Kaidan's duties with the Alliance had kept him away most of the time since then he knew from his parents that the couple continued to be either very happy and affectionate, or – a single yell and another slammed door rang out in the background – _or like that_. "Well, tell them I said 'hi'."

"We will," his mother said hurriedly. "Oh – there was a breaking news flash on the extranet a little while ago that said Commander Shepard has been made a Spectre! Is that true?"

Kaidan winced at the excitement in her voice – _just what Shepard wouldn't want_. "Yes," he said calmly, "And that's why I can't talk long. She already has an assignment, so we have to go."

"Bad idea, that whole Spectre business," his father growled. "Humanity shouldn't go groveling to the Council for anything – not a Spectre, not a seat on the Council – nothing. Eden Prime showed we can take care of ourselves." Kaidan could imagine his father crossing his arms and jutting his chin out defiantly. A retort – _Maybe not_ – stuck in his throat.

His mother's voice cut softly into the silence. "What do you mean, 'we'?"

"The _Normandy_," he replied. "We're still her ship." He heard his mother draw in a sharp breath. "I don't know when I'll be able to call again."

"Be careful," his mother said.

"Extra careful," his father added. "Especially around that Shepard."

"Viktor –"

"Getting mixed up with aliens in the Spectres," his father continued without pause. "Watch your step around her."

Kaidan's mother sighed. "Don't worry about any of that, just – " Her voice caught. "Just stay safe."

"This is a good crew," he replied confidently. "We'll be fine."

"If you say so," his father grunted.

Kaidan shook his head. "You guys take care."

"You too," his mother said. "We love you."

"Love you too," Kaidan said quickly. "Goodbye." He tapped the 'End Call' icon on the screen, leaning back in his chair as the connection happily beeped its own demise.

_You had to do that_, he sighed, staring at the Alliance logo that now filled the screen. _No flying off on a dangerous, top-secret mission without calling your mother before you leave, even if it means having to deal with your father, too._ He'd never gotten along with his father very well – even following in his footsteps by joining the Alliance military hadn't warmed their relationship, at least for the first few years. It hadn't been until Kaidan had last been home on leave just two years ago that his father had at last taken notice of all the ribbons on his uniform for service medals and special commendations and given him a single, terse "Good job."

Kanjin had always been their father's favorite. The star athlete who somehow managed top marks in school while barely ever seeming to study. A breezy charmer with classically handsome looks that kept him surrounded by friends and a stereotypically beautiful blonde girlfriend – though, Kaidan thought with a chuckle, Shepard probably had more sense in her little finger than Krystal had in her entire head. Early admission to a top university and a lucrative, fast-tracked job at a major financial corporation had soon followed. By contrast, Kaidan had been a skinny, pale bookworm who hated his hair and barely said five words to anyone while pulling all nighters to eke out the same grades from the same exams as his big brother. He hadn't been teased much by Kanjin or his friends, or belittled by their father – he'd simply been unnoticed. His mother knew it and had tried to make up for it in her smaller, quieter ways but that had only helped a little. So when Kaidan had tested positive for biotic potential and been offered the chance to be implanted and whisked away to a special school for biotic kids on the distant and exotic Jump Zero station, he hadn't hesitated.

He stood slowly, powering down the terminal before stepping away from the desk. _Jump Zero…_ His family hadn't known any details of what had happened during his time there for years, but they'd quickly realized that the son they'd sent was not the son who returned. He'd had little patience for his mother's reticence or his father's bluster, and none at all for Kanjin's thoughtless cruising through life. Barricading himself in his room and talking to no one except when absolutely necessary, he'd stayed long enough to finish school before packing a bag and heading for the nearest transit station. He spent the next five years travelling, stopping when he ran low on credits to work odd jobs for a few months until he had enough money to move on. Seattle – Los Angeles – Tokyo – Moscow – Cairo – London – he'd even worked for a little while on a transport that took him to Terra Nova and Elysium a few times. It was that taste of space on his own terms and the time spent around the Alliance soldiers and marines he'd met while exploring those colonies that drove him home long enough for a bath and a haircut before going down to the recruiting station to enlist. Identified as officer potential because of his test scores and biotics, he'd been offered admission into the Academy. This time he said 'yes' because it was what he wanted to do, not because it was something his brother hadn't already done and done better.

The door slid open suddenly – "Oh, sorry!" Ensign Sanchez's voice called out.

"No, it's alright," Kaidan said quickly. "I'm finished."

Sanchez poked his head around the doorframe. "Are you sure? I can come back later –"

"It's all yours," Kaidan cut in, waving the younger man into the room. Though they all had their own computers and desks it was ordinary politeness not to stay in the room when one of your bunkmates was calling home. "I'll see you up on the bridge."

"Sure," the ensign nodded as he sat down in front of his terminal. Kaidan turned and headed for the door. "Oh, by the way," Sanchez called after him, "The commander was looking for you. Said she'd be in her office."

"Oh." Kaidan's chest tightened. "Okay. Thanks." Sanchez waved a hand in acknowledgment as the screen in front of him blinked into life.

Kaidan headed quickly down the hall towards the combination cabin and office designated for the Normandy's commanding officer, recently vacated by Captain Anderson. He took a couple of deep breaths as the door came into view, trying to calm his suddenly thumping heartbeat. Reaching out to press the comm button he noticed his hand was shaking slightly – he balled it into a fist as a pleasant "Come in," echoed through the comm.

The music hit his ears as soon as the door opened – lots of drums and guitars, all of it loud. She was standing with her back towards him, closing the door of one of her floor-to-ceiling lockers – _bare arms and shoulders above that tight black –_ "Off," she called out, turning around. Kaidan clenched his hands behind his back as the music stopped, trying to look far more at ease than he felt. "Lieutenant," she said brightly, navigating her way around a handful of half-unpacked containers scattered on the floor and waving him towards the small table and chairs near where he stood. "Have you had a chance to make a call yet?"

"Yes, ma'am," he replied, clearing his throat twice to get the words out as he sat. "Just got off the line with my parents."

"They're doing alright?" she asked, dropping lightly into the chair across from him.

_Watch your step around her…_ "They are, ma'am. A little worried about me, but I told them this was a good crew. I'd be fine." She nodded, a small smile lighting up her face. "What about you, ma'am?" he asked impulsively, struggling to keep his eyes staring straight ahead. "Did you make any calls?"

If she was bothered by the personal nature of the question she didn't show it. "No," she said simply. "I emailed a few friends to let them know I'll be off the grid for a while, but that's all."

"You think we'll be gone for a long time?" he asked, feeling strangely relieved.

"Normally I'd say the mission will take as long as it takes," she sighed, "But we don't have the luxury of time. Saren's on the move and we don't know how far ahead of us he is, so we're going to have to go hard and go fast to catch up." She leaned back in her chair and frowned. "Even then we'll probably need to catch a break or two."

"Well, Saren made a mistake on Eden Prime," Kaidan said slowly. "He didn't destroy the beacon before we could get to it. Without even the little bit of the vision you saw that makes sense, we'd be lost."

Shepard shook her head. "We can't plan on Saren being that sloppy a second time." She shifted to sit forward again, clasping her hands together on the tabletop. "We have to make the most use of every resource we have. Which is why I've brought Wrex, Garrus and Tali on board," she continued slowly, her eyes watching him for any reaction, "And why I'm making some changes to the way some other things have been set up until now." He nodded, willing the rest of his body to stay still. Shepard's gaze stayed on him for a long moment, then broke away with a sudden, sharp nod. "Your service record was already quite impressive," she said quickly, "But you proved on Eden Prime that it doesn't even begin to do you justice. As good as it is to have someone of your talents on the command deck, given what we're going up against I'd rather have you next to me groundside when the shooting starts. So, effective immediately, I am relieving you of all weapons officer duties and assigning you as commander of the _Normandy_'s marine squadrons. Ensign Sanchez will take over your chair in the helm."

"Commander, I…" Kaidan shook his head, letting the impact of her words wash over him. Squad commander was a position for no less than an O-4 – Shepard herself had held that job in combination with her XO duties until just a few hours ago. _She just promoted you in every way she could._ He glanced back up at her, feeling his posture stiffen instinctively under her expectant stare. "Yes, ma'am." _She's trusting you with her crew's life…and with her own_. "Thank you, ma'am."

She gave him small, understanding smile. "Don't thank me – thank yourself, Lieutenant. You're the one who earned it." He nodded again, letting himself smile back at her. "We've got four new squadron members now," she continued, "Three of them non-human. Your point that some of the crew may have difficulty adjusting to their presence was a good one, so you're going to be in charge of making sure there aren't any problems within the ground teams." She paused, tilting her head slightly to one side. "If anything happens with someone who outranks you, just let me know and I'll handle it," she said quietly.

"Yes, ma'am," he said quickly, remembering the look on Pressley's face when she'd arrived back on the _Normandy_ with their unusual new comrades in tow.

"One situation that needs to be addressed right away is the fact that none of us ever trained to fight Geth." She leaned back in her chair, shoulders relaxed but eyes alert and still watching him closely. "Pirate gangs and mercs – no problem. Batarians – sure thing. But Geth?" She shrugged. "They're a mystery. We've got some of the best marines in the Alliance on this ship, but after what happened on Eden Prime they're worried they're in over their heads."

"They should be," Kaidan intoned, the image of bodies impaled on those mysterious tripods flicking just behind his eyes.

Shepard nodded again. "I agree," she said softly. "Which is why I've asked Tali to give several briefings on the Geth." Kaidan felt his eyebrows shoot up involuntarily in surprise. "The Quarians created the Geth, and despite the centuries that have passed since the Geth rebelled no other species knows them better," the commander reasoned. "She'll go over the different models, their capabilities, their strengths, and what and where their weaknesses are. I want you to set it all up." Kaidan sat up a little straighter in his chair. "Start with our marines, then work your way through the rest of the crew. Be sure to schedule the engineering and nav teams separately from the rest since they'll want more information about Geth ships rather than their groundside combat units. I want you and Chief Williams to attend every session to give your personal take on fighting Geth, and to reassure the crew that they can be fought and killed just like any other enemy we've faced. I'll try to drop in and add my two cents as often as I can."

"Yes, ma'am," he said again, hoping he sounded more confident this time.

She seemed pleased with his reaction, giving him yet another nod. "We'll work on our plan for getting to Dr. T'Soni when we get an idea of where exactly she is," she said. "Any other questions?"

He thought to say no, to stand up and take his leave of her while he felt he still could, but something pulled his eyes back to hers. "Ma'am, can I ask you something…" The sound of his own voice fell flat in the silence – he stopped, suddenly wondering if he shouldn't just get out while he still seemed to be on her good side.

"Like I said before, Alenko," she said in a low, even voice, "It's my firm belief that anyone serving under my command has the right to ask me anything they want – so long as you understand if the question is personal it's my right not to answer."

"Yes, ma'am," he said, feeling his fingers going numb as he fought to remember what he'd originally thought to ask. "You, ah…you said earlier that you didn't get your biotic implants until just a few years ago," he started slowly.

"That's right," she said quickly. "I didn't know I was a biotic until after the Blitz."

"Oh," he nodded, even as he wondered how it was possible that she hadn't known. "I guess that's why it wasn't mentioned."

Her eyes sharpened. "Mentioned where?" Kaidan's cheeks started to burn. "If there's a roaring trade below decks in gossip about me I'd like to know about it. Maybe even start a few rumors to make myself seem more interesting than I actually am," she added, grinning as she watched him blush.

"I don't think that's possib –" He clenched his hands into fists to keep from embarrassing himself any more than he already had. "Ah, no ma'am, there's not. At least, no more than there's probably been on any ship you've served on since the Blitz." She shrugged and chuckled, waving a hand to give him permission to go on. "I was referring to the news specials about you that ran after the battle on Elysium. None of them mentioned that you were a biotic." He'd spent some of the time before she'd gotten back to the _Normandy_ reviewing key portions of the more popular ones, not wanting to be caught forgetting an important detail about her background – such as being an orphan – a second time.

"There's a lot of things those specials didn't mention about me, Lieutenant," she said coolly.

"Understood, ma'am," he replied instinctively, willing his body to not squirm under Shepard's suddenly unwavering stare.

She held his gaze for a long moment before blinking and then leaning back into her chair. "I spent a couple of days in the hospital recovering from my injuries after the siege of the colony was lifted," she said, her voice and posture relaxing. "At some point somebody noticed I was full of eezo nodules."

"You didn't test positive during your military entrance processing?" Kaidan asked cautiously, not wanting to push too far.

"They'd stopped giving the tests at most MEP stations just before I enlisted," Shepard shrugged. "Testing in the local schools had become so comprehensive the Alliance couldn't justify the cost of trying to find the one kid in ten thousand who might've slipped through."

Kaidan nodded. "Yeah, I was a freshman in high school when they identified me. You never got a hit?"

"I had a very irregular childhood. I wasn't in school very much," she said lightly. "At any rate, once my injuries healed the brass trotted me around the Alliance on a PR tour. I met Captain Anderson for the first time when we were paired up at some recruiting function on Mars. He started our conversation by mentioning that the closest the admiral who gave the keynote address had ever come to a real firefight was when he used too much lighter fluid on his charcoal grill." She shook her head, smiling wistfully. "First real laugh I'd had in weeks. By the end of the evening Anderson had offered me a spot on his crew. The only hangup was that the slot was supposed to be for a combined tactics operative – conventional weapons and biotics. So I took the plunge and got the implants, then spent what free time I had between appearances learning some of the basics so I wouldn't accidentally warp myself in combat." Her smile broadened into a conspiratorial grin as she leaned forward in her chair. "Once I was ready Anderson had a friend of his in PERSCOM push the paperwork for the transfer through late on a Friday night. By the time the brass got to the office on Monday we were already in the Traverse."

"He must've caught hell for that," Kaidan chuckled.

Shepard waved a hand in the air as if brushing the thought away. "We both did, but anything that pisses off that many admirals can't be wrong." They both laughed, and as Kaidan dared to look directly at her again her gaze flicked onto him. She hesitated, her smile still lightening her face and brightening her eyes – Kaidan broke into a sudden sweat under his fatigues, immobilized as the thick pulse of his racing heart filled his ears. "I, uh," she coughed softly as the smile faded, "I won't keep you any longer, Lieutenant. You have a lot of work to do. Please find Ensign Sanchez and ask him to step in here for a minute so I can tell him about his new job," she added quickly.

"Yes, ma'am," he said quickly, standing up as he spoke. "Thank you, ma'am."

"I said 'Don't thank me' Lieutenant, and I meant it," Shepard replied sharply. "You've earned this. Don't be afraid of it." She paused again, her eyes wandering off to one side before finally snapping back to him. "Or me."

Kaidan's throat tightened. "No, ma'am – I mean, yes, ma'am," he choked out. "I won't be."

His words lingered in the air for a moment as Shepard relaxed back into her chair. "That will be all, Lieutenant," she said calmly.

He saluted, turned, and strode out of her quarters as fast as he could without breaking into a run. _What the hell…?_ For the brief moment when their eyes met something had changed – his commanding officer had vanished, replaced by a redheaded woman with green eyes that seemed to crackle with electricity as he held her gaze. Then just as suddenly as the moment had come it had gone, and she was back to being the Commander again. He stopped just before reaching the door to his quarters, leaning against the wall as the memories of a different moment floated through his mind. Down in the wards, looking out at the Citadel…the slight blush that crept across her face as she murmured 'I appreciate the thought'… Kaidan took a deep breath, trying to calm his thoughts so he could make some sense out of them. _Get a hold of yourself, Alenko. Just because you're getting a crush on your CO doesn't mean she's –_

He started at the sound of the door sliding open. "Hey, Lieutenant," Sanchez called out as he strode though it into the hall. "The comm's all yours if you've got another call to make."

"No – thanks, I'm done," he said quickly. "But, uh, the Commander asked to see you in her office as soon as possible." Sanchez froze. "Nothing bad," Kaidan reassured him. "Just go talk to her."

Sanchez nodded nervously. "She's not as scary as she seems in the vids, right?"

"No," Kaidan replied with a shake of his head. He watched Sanchez start down the hall as the warmth of her smile crept through him. _Quite the opposite_.

* * *

The first several days went by in a blur. The _Normandy_ jumped from one system to another, and more often than not Kaidan found himself dropping groundside with the Commander in the Mako infantry fighting vehicle or docking with a ship to respond to the distress calls that were sadly typical of duty in the Traverse. Even when he was back on the ship he barely had time to catch his breath before plunging back into his new duties, keeping the briefings about the Geth that Shepard had requested running on schedule while making sure Garrus, Tali, and Wrex were settling in alright. More than once he found himself looking at his datapad or a nearby control panel not just to check the time but the date.

In the midst of all the controlled chaos Shepard seemed to be everywhere and nowhere at the same time – never where he expected her to be but never very far away, either. She wouldn't be in the CIC while he was also there, plotting out drop zones for their next mission with Joker and Pressley, but then when he went down to the cargo hold to check on the Mako she'd be there chatting with Garrus or Wrex. Not in the mess at breakfast, but leaning on Joker's chair up in the cockpit, nursing a can of coffee and laughing. One night after a particularly hard day spent storming a ship full of human biotics who'd kidnapped an Alliance politician, he'd headed towards the small exercise room tucked into a corner of the engineering deck hoping to work off some stress only to hear Shepard's voice echoing down the hall as he approached. "Do you want some music?"

"Sure," Williams voice replied. He heard footsteps moving around in the room, then a loud burst of guitars and drums surged down the hall. "Good choice, Commander," Williams called out over the din. "I love this band!"

Kaidan came closer to the open archway leading into the room. "Yeah, they're pretty good," the commander said.

"Have you ever seen them live?"

"A few times," Shepard answered lightly, suddenly coming into Kaidan's view, as she grabbed a few extra weights off of a rack near the doorway. "I've got a source close to the band that gets me good tickets, even backstage passes." She was wearing a dark, loose shirt and leggings that ended just above her knees, but all Kaidan's mind could see were the bare shoulders and tight black corset on the woman at the concert back on Arcturus. "Tell you what," he heard Shepard add as he fled back down the hall, praying he hadn't been seen, "When all this is over I'll get you in next time they play…"

The comfortable chaos of mission after mission and each day tumbling into the next came to a screeching halt when he, Shepard and Williams returned from one outing with an extra passenger in tow – Dr. Liara T'Soni, an Asari archaeologist and daughter of Saren's chief ally, Matriarch Benezia. They'd found her trapped in Prothean ruins uncovered by a mining operation, surrounded by Geth and Krogan mercenaries on orders from Saren to either capture or kill her. Dispatching them had been a fairly routine operation – sprinting back to the surface as the disturbance caused by all the fighting started caving in the mine on top of them was a closer thing. "Well, there's my cardio workout for the week," Shepard had rasped.

Kaidan wsn't surprised by the ripple of whispers and open stares that began following the Asari the moment she boarded the _Normandy_. The ability of an Asari to engage in 'relations' with any gender of any other species was a constant source of titillation among the younger marines, especially when one of the clubs on Arcturus brought in a high-priced Asari feature dancer from the Citadel, or even Ilium. He himself had never cared much for the too-obvious clothing and demeanor of the dancers – seeing human women in the same outfits also failed to excite him – but the few more professional Asari he'd met over the years did have a confident, alluring manner that kept every eye in the room on them. Even Williams, who glared openly at any of the other non-humans on board whenever she saw them had let out a genuine laugh upon hearing Liara describe herself as "only" a hundred and six years old during the mission debrief. "Damn, I hope I look that good when I'm your age," she'd quipped, prompting an approving chuckle from Shepard.

The most important part of the debrief was Liara's confirmation of the theory developed from Shepard's vision and Tali's information – that the Reapers were a race of sentient machines responsible for the Prothean extinction. What the Asari added was her observation over decades of archeological work that the Protheans were far from the first civilization to rise up and be suddenly and inexplicably destroyed, all presumably by these Reapers. Kaidan stared absentmindedly at the holodisplay of their next destination, Feros, as the Asari tried to explain her findings. _This…is getting big_, he thought, shaking his head. _How can any of this be true? How could a race of sentient machines even exist, let alone last for tens – no, hundreds of thousands of years, overwhelming civilization after civilization but remaining completely invisible to the races that come along later?_ Liara seemed convinced – more importantly, so did Shepard, who closed out the briefing quickly but firmly, stalking out of the comm center in the direction of her quarters. Kaidan lingered, gazing at the holodisplay. _Then again_, he sighed to himself before turning to leave, _how can we take the risk that this *isn't* true?_

He was still trying to sort everything out in his head a few hours later, as he finished cleaning his gear and headed up to the crew deck to grab something to eat. He'd been nursing a slight headache ever since one of the Krogan mercenaries seeking Liara had charged into him during the last firefight, so all he wanted was to grab something simple and portable to take back to his quarters. Rounding the corner from the elevator to the mess area, however, he found his path blocked by at least half the crew, all sitting or standing even though only a few of them had any food. As the crowd reluctantly parted to let him through he saw what had to be the source of their gathering – Liara, sitting at a table with Shepard, Williams, Garrus, Tali, and Wrex. Kaidan quickly realized that the crowd surrounding him was nearly all male, comprising of every single crewman except Joker and nearly all of the married ones, too. _Next time Shepard cracks a joke about men being unevolved I'm going to have to sit there and take it_, he sighed, heading for some boxed rations laid out on a side table.

"Hey, L-T!" Williams' voice rang out over the heads of the crowd. He turned around to face her and the others at the table as the rest of the room fell silent. "Grab a seat," she said, waving a hand towards the only empty chair at the table – the only one in the entire room, for that matter. He thought for a second about declining politely, but then Shepard's eyes glanced up to meet his and suddenly his legs were moving towards the table of their own accord.

Shepard gave him a nod as he sat down, then turned her gaze back to Wrex. "So what happened next?"

"By the third day the station was barely holding together," the Krogan rumbled, grinning. "The mercs were dead or gone, life support was failing. But I had her. She'd locked herself in the med labs. She was trying to patch herself up. Damn tough, that woman. Then just when I thought I had her, the station's core went critical. Barely made it back to my ship in time." A ration tray was unceremoniously dropped in front of Kaidan by a passing yeoman as Wrex finished, its compartments filled with not-quite-right looking versions of a traditional turkey dinner.

"I assume the Asari commando didn't make it," Liara said sadly.

Wrex's grin lengthened. "I watched the station from a distance. I never saw her leave. And when that place blew, there was nothing left larger than a turian's right nut."

"Hey!" Garrus called out, slapping the table in mock outrage. "I think you've got us confused with the Salarians."

"If you say so," Wrex laughed. "At any rate, I headed back to my employer to give him the good news and collect my pay. But before I got halfway there, Aleena sent me a message. 'Better luck next time.'" Wrex broke out into a sinister laugh, soon echoed by Garrus and Williams. Tali merely shook her head, her expression indiscernible beneath her mask, while Liara frowning, confused.

"Damn," Shepard laughed, shaking her head. "Did you ever hear from her again?"

"No," Wrex said in a low voice, almost as if he was sighing. "But I've got the feeling that I will, someday."

"Assuming she's still alive," Williams added.

Wrex leaned back, grinning. "That all happened about two centuries ago, and she still had a ways to go before she hit the matriarch stage. Give or take a few decades – she never gave me her exact age. She's out there somewhere. If she wants me to know, I will."

"What about you, commander?" Garrus chimed in, pushing his tray of neon-colored food away from him. "I imagine the first human Spectre must have some good war stories to tell."

Shepard's fork paused in midair, a generous helping of rehydrated roast turkey with gravy balanced precariously above her tray. "Stories, yes," she said slowly. "Not sure they qualify as 'good' since they mostly involve me being shot at."

"That's the best part," Wrex laughed as Shepard finished her bite. "Without the possibility of death we'd just be telling children's stories."

"What about the Skyllian Blitz?" Garrus asked as soon as Wrex had finished. "Your Alliance gave you its highest award for your role in saving the colony and defeating the pirates." Wrex and Tali's heads nodded – Kaidan focused on poking his fork at the rehydrated mashed potatoes, remembering Shepard's less than cheerful response to being asked about the Blitz or the Star of Terra back on the Citadel. "How did you survive the initial attack?"

"Mostly by being too stubborn to die," Shepard countered, her voice light but with a coolness that Kaidan was quickly learning signaled danger ahead.

Liara shook her head. "There must be more to it than simple will," she said. "Especially on the second day, when your position was overrun by Batarians and you held out for three hours all by yourself until reinforcements arrived."

The commander's eyes narrowed. "You've been looking me up?" she asked softly – too softly. Kaidan and Williams traded _uh-oh_ looks.

"I – I apologize, Commander," Liara stammered, blushing. "After our last conversation I was afraid I would say something stupid again. So I watched one of the programs that were made about you just after the Blitz."

Silence fell over the table, broken only by the tapping of one of Shepard's fingers against her tray. After a moment Tali sat forward and cleared her throat. "I also looked up information about you, Shepard," her voice rasped through her mask.

"So did I," Garrus chimed in, "After our first meeting outside the Chora's Den. I had a feeling I'd be seeing you again, so I wanted to get a better idea of the kind of human I'd be dealing with."

The set of Shepard's jaw eased as she let out a soft sigh. "There's no need to go behind my back. I've said it before," she continued, glancing around the table, "And I'll say it again – you can ask me anything you want. As long as it's not too personal, I'll answer."

Her offer was greeting with silence and sheepish glances, as if once given the opportunity to ask any question the others suddenly couldn't think of a single one worth asking. Finally, Williams lifted a hand in the air. "I've got a question for you, Commander," she called out. Shepard leaned back, chuckling ruefully before giving Williams a go-ahead nod. "Are you East Coast or West Coast?" Shepard frowned slightly. "Your basic training," Williams continued quickly. "Parris Island or Pendleton?"

The commander gave a slight shake of her head. "Neither. Samothrace."

"Samothrace?" Williams echoed, sounding confused. "But that's where they send the recruits from the EU."

"Yes, it is," Shepard nodded.

"Well…no offense ma'am, but you don't sound like you're from Europe," Williams replied.

Shepard leaned back in her chair, smiling. "Most native Dubliners have very mild accents to begin with," she said. "Within a few years of joining the Alliance and leaving home mine faded away."

Williams blinked, surprised. "You're Irish?"

"Red-ish hair, green eyes, pale skin?" Shepared asked, her smile broadening into a grin. "All I'm missing are some freckles or I'd be a walking genetic stereotype."

"I – uh, I'd figured the hair was a dye job," Williams shrugged apologetically.

The commander leaned back in towards the table, chuckling. "Like I'd have the patience to keep my roots touched up during a three-month cruise." More laughter echoed around the table. "I'm pretty sure my country of origin was mentioned in all those vids about me," Shepard added.

"Can't say I watched any of them," Williams replied quickly, her tone suddenly tense. "We're not big on history in my family."

"Right," the commander breathed, giving the chief an understanding – even borderline sympathetic – nod. "Well, I was born in Dublin and spent most of my childhood there, either in orphanages or the occasional foster home. I enlisted in the Alliance Navy on my eighteenth birthday."

Garrus let out a knowing laugh. "Couldn't bear to wait another day?"

"I got to the recruitment center an hour before it opened," Shepard confirmed. "Alright – any other questions?" The same awkward silence that Williams had broken descended on the table again. "You might never catch me in this good a mood again," the commander grinned, pushing her tray away.

"I've got one." The words tore out of Kaidan before he could stop them. Shepard's gaze swung his way – all the questions he had about her, or for her, that he didn't dare ask in front of the others swirled through his mind as he searched frantically for one that was safe. "I…I was wondering...where did you learn to drive?" The commander blinked in surprise. "And don't say it was the assault vehicle training school on Luna," Kaidan added. "I've been through that course and they do not teach the crazy stuff you were doing back on Edolus." At one point Shepard had decided that driving down the navigable side of a small mountain was taking too long, so she'd simply turned the wheel and taken them down the side of the cliff. The bruises he'd gotten in the landing still hadn't completely faded.

The commander drummed her fingertips on the table a few times, staring pensively at the ceiling for a long moment before turning her gaze back to him. "Joyriding and dodging the police in stolen cars," she said slowly.

Williams' mouth dropped open. "What?"

Garrus leaned back in his chair, shaking his head in amusement. "Ground or sky cars?"

"Both. I didn't steal them – that was too technical for me," Shepard added. "I was just the driver."

There had been brief and muted allusions in some of the biographical vids that the commander had run with a gang in her teenage years, Kaidan recalled, but no proof had ever been offered. "You would've been convicted as an accomplice all the same," Kaidan said softly, not quite able to imagine a wild, law-breaking Shepard. _Then again, she's shown she still has a healthy disregard for rules and regulations_, he reminded himself. _How much worse would she have been before spending a decade in uniform?_

"True," she said, taking a sip of her drink. Kaidan glanced back up at her to see that her eyes were still locked on him. "But they would've had to catch us first."

"They never did?" Liara asked, looking just as mystified as Kaidan felt.

"Not when I was driving," Shepard grinned, finally shifting her gaze to the others around the table. "Which was why I was the one who always drove."

Wrex let out a single, loud laugh. "It's too bad I didn't meet you before you joined your Alliance," he rumbled, grinning wickedly. "You would've made a fine mercenary."

"Thank you, Wrex," Shepard replied brightly, lifting her cup in the Krogan's direction. "I –"

"Commander Shepard!" The sharp squawking of Joker's voice over the comm caused everyone to flinch and half-cover their ears, wherever they were. "Incoming message from the Council!"

She let out a sigh, pushing herself away from the table and standing quickly. "Always such wonderful timing," she sighed. "I'll see you all in the morning."

The gathering at the table began to break up soon after Shepard's departure. Kaidan waited until two of the others had gone before murmuring a generic "Good night", then moving quickly towards the hall that led back to his quarters. Halfway there, just after turning a corner that took him out of sight from the common areas, a figure stepped into his path. "Lieutenant –" He instinctively jumped back a step, his head snapping up to see the figure of Liara standing in front of him. "Forgive my intrusion," the Asari continued rapidly, twisting her hands together. "I wondered if I could ask you something."

Liara had been the first to leave the table after Shepard – had she been waiting here in the hall for him to appear? "Um…sure," he said slowly. He knew he should be excited find himself in a private moment with an Asari – most of the crew would give a month's pay to even have her say 'Hello' to them – but he found himself strangely unmoved. _Please let this be about something – or someone – other than me…_

"I know the Commander said she wasn't upset with me for researching her background," Liara began, glancing around to ensure they were alone, "But…do you think that's true? Or did my actions offend her, and she merely made light of the situation in order to spare me further embarrassment?"

_Huh?_ "Why aren't you asking her?" he replied.

"I will, but I thought I would ask your opinion first," the Asari said calmly. "She seems to trust you more than the others, so I thought that you might know her best."

Kaidan quickly shook his head. "I wouldn't say that."

"No?" Liara's eyebrows shot up in surprise. "I am told you have accompanied her on every mission but one or two."

"I'm her squad leader," he countered. "Being the sort of marine she wants by her side on a mission is part of my job."

The Asari's eyes narrowed into a look that verged between curiosity and suspicion. "She looks at you more than anyone else, though she tries to hide it." Kaidan dropped his eyes to avoid her gaze as the warmth under his collar began to build. "Her concern for your opinion is particularly obvious after she's made a decision or revealed something about herself, as she did earlier this evening. She wants to see your reaction."

Kaidan made himself take a deep breath and count to three, hoping that would stop the feeling that the deck was about to fall out from underneath his feet. "She's my commanding officer," he said slowly, hoping he sounded more confident in his words than he actually felt. "We respect each other as soldiers, and value the other's good opinion of ourselves and our actions." He paused, watching Liara frown skeptically – that line had sounded better when it had come from his Theories of Leadership professor. "Maybe someday we might know each other well enough to call ourselves friends, but nothing more," he added. _Believing the alternative has…consequences._ "There are regulations against that."

"Oh," Liara said shortly. "I'm sorry. I had thought..." She seemed to blush with embarrassment as her voice trailed off.

"Look," Kaidan sighed, wanting to get out of this conversation before any more dangerous ideas took root in his head, "I can tell you that if she was really mad at you, you wouldn't need to ask for a second opinion." The Asari brightened, giving him a small, grateful smile. "Other than that she can be a little prickly, especially when she's frustrated. But it's nothing personal."

"Frustrated? By what?" Liara asked quickly, frowning.

He was about to shrug and tell Liara that her guess would probably be as good as his, but paused as the memory of Shepard storming angrily out of the Alliance embassy on the Citadel floated through his mind. "Could be anything, really," he began cautiously, "But overall I'd say she's probably just mad at herself for not being able to figure out what's really going on with Saren and the Reapers."

"I've been studying the Protheans and their extinction for fifty years, and am little closer to an answer now than when I began," Liara said ruefully.

"The commander's not a patient woman," Kaidan chuckled.

Liara nodded thoughtfully. "With herself most of all, it would seem." She seemed to relax as she gave him a grateful smile. "Thank you, Lieutenant."

Kaidan stood in the hall for a long while after Liara had gone, torn between trying to understand all the things she'd said and trying to forget them. He had gone along with Shepard on most missions, but that was part of a squad leader's job description. _She's supposed to be able to trust me to have her back anytime she needs me there._ They'd had a lot of conversations since she'd come on board – some of which were longer than the all the talks he'd had with some previous CO's combined – but he'd seen her talking to nearly everyone else on the crew. _Doesn't mean she's spending more time with me than anyone else._

_But when she answered your question about where she learned to drive she didn't take her eyes off of you_, he argued to himself. He shook his head, trying to ignore the feeling that she wouldn't even have given an honest answer if it had been anyone but him asking. _She's my commanding officer_, he repeated, forcing himself to put one foot in front of the other in the direction of his quarters. _There are regs_.

* * *

Most Alliance veterans swore they could tell when the ship they were on had turned. It wasn't supposed to be possible – the motion dampeners that all but the smallest ships were equipped with cushioned their crews against feeling the pull of any non-emergency manuevers. The only way to be sure the ship's course had changed was to check its' position on a navchart. Still, nearly every sailor or marine who had a least one full tour under their belt swore they could feel it happening. Some combination of the variations in the sound of engines and hydraulics, they said, coupled with a sixth sense anyone who spent a lot time in space developed for when something around them had changed. So when Kaidan's head jerked up off the pillow at what the chrono told him was 0200, a creeping sensation in the back of his mind told him the _Normandy_ was no longer on the course it had set for Feros the evening before. What pulled him out of bed was not having any idea where they might be headed now, or why.

The helmsman – Joker's third-shift replacement – shrugged. "The Citadel," he said.

"The Citadel?" _That's halfway across the galaxy in the wrong direction._ "Why?"

"Ask the commander," he shrugged again. "She gave the order a few minutes ago, just after receiving a message from Admiral Hackett. Didn't tell me why."

Kaidan tramped back down the stairs to the crew deck, trying to ignore the image in his mind of Shepard rolling over in bed, half-clothed, to answer her comm and relay the order. _She'll brief us in the morning_, he told himself, glancing absentmindedly through the nearby open doorway to the Officers' Lounge before turning towards the narrow hall that led back to his quarters –

A familiar set of slim shoulders topped by reddish-brown hair pulled up in a knot peeked over the top of the main sofa, silhouetted by the glow of the vidscreen in the otherwise dimmed and empty room. He thought for a moment about passing by, heading back to his bunk and hoping he could keep her out of his head long enough to sleep – but then the shoulders shifted, tilting her head almost imperceptibly in his direction. _Busted_. With a slight cough to make sure she knew he was approaching, he stepped into lounge. Shepard was stretched out in the far corner of the couch, her feet resting on the coffee table next to a small glass half-full of a golden-colored liquid. She held her datapad in her right hand while her left lay draped over the armrest. Kaidan snapped to attention as she turned her head all the way around and looked at him. "Commander, I, uh…I hope I'm not interrupting anything," he said quickly.

For a moment he imagined he saw the corners of her mouth flicker. "You're not, Lieutenant," she replied, turning her eyes back to her datapad. "Couldn't sleep?"

"No, ma'am." Shepard seemed to frown. "Well, I did for a while," he corrected himself quickly, "But then I woke up with the feeling that we'd changed course."

"You really don't take enough shore leave, do you?" she asked, chuckling gently.

He smiled as he shrugged. _Damn, she's good_. "Apparently not."

"I take it you weren't satisfied with Lieutenant Singh's answer?"

"No," he acknowledged, shaking his head, "But I figured you'd brief us in the morning."

"Urgent request from Admiral Hackett," she said calmly, tapping a finger against her datapad. "Probably would've been an order, but I think he's not sure he can give me one now I'm a Spectre." Scowling at what she saw on the screen, she gave the datapad one more hard tap before removing her feet from the coffee table and putting the datapad down in their place. "Considering I'm not sure he can't, I thought heading back was a good idea."

Kaidan nodded, glancing over at the vidscreen. Two men sitting in a studio were talking, but Shepard had the volume turned down so he couldn't hear what they were saying. Finally the words 'Halftime Report' and the Champions League logo flashed on the screen. "Did the Hackett say why we're needed back at the Citadel so soon?" he asked.

"No," Shepard said shortly. "Admiral's prerogative." She fell silent, directing her gaze to the vidscreen.

A familiar ad touting the benefits of life on a colony world was playing – a perky blond woman was talking while standing in a prefabricated building far nicer than any Kaidan had seen on a colony world other than the well-established Terra Nova. "What's the score?"

"Tied, one all," Shepard said. "D.C. United scored on a header after a corner, and Palmeiras was awarded a penalty kick on a crap call in the box."

"You didn't think it was a foul?" he asked.

"Me, most of the crowd, and both commentators," she muttered. "The United defender bumped the guy, sure, but it wasn't that bad. Let them play."

He laughed softly – he should've figured Shepard wouldn't appreciate a referee with a quick whistle. "Are yellow cards being handed out like candy?"

"I'm surprised both teams are still at full strength," she said, frowning at the vidscreen and shaking her head. "I was trying to explain the difference between what should be a regular foul and what deserves a yellow card to Liara, but what's the point when the referee doesn't seem to know?"

His mouth suddenly went dry. "She was here?" he asked, trying to act casual. _After she talked to me?_

"She stopped by to chat for a few minutes before she went to her quarters," Shepard replied calmly. She paused, clearing her throat quietly. "Were you looking for her?"

"No," he said quickly. "I already had a chance to talk with her after dinner." Shepard nodded, throwing him a curious gaze. _What is going on?_ "She seems nice enough," he added carefully, "If you like the bookish sort."

"Do you?"

There was an odd tension in Shepard's voice that made the room, the match, and all other distractions fade away. "No, ma'am," Kaidan replied quietly, trying to keep his voice even while his eyes refused to look away from hers. "I prefer more adventurous women."

"Good to know," she said, her voice and her nod relaxed as she turned away from him and reached for her glass.

_I must still be asleep, and this is just a dream._ He stared at the clear, golden-colored liquid so he wouldn't stare at her lips. _This can't really be happening._ "Ma'am, is that…uh, alcohol?"

"It might be," she allowed, taking a small sip.

"I, uh…I thought we were still operating under Alliance regs," he said warily. Shepard had stated quite clearly that, despite her new Spectre status, as the _Normandy_ was still an Alliance ship with a mostly Alliance crew it would be run no differently than any other ship in the fleet – and the possession or consumption of alcoholic beverages on Alliance ships was strictly prohibited.

She set the glass back down on the table. "We are," she said lightly. "But you don't strike me as someone who'd have a problem with his commanding officer having a private stash of good Irish whiskey for a little off-duty relaxation."

"No, ma'am." She glanced back over at him and grinned – his mind went blank. "Not if you're willing to share," he heard himself add.

That caught her by surprise – she blinked, thoughts swirling behind narrowed eyes. "Grab yourself a glass, then," she said slowly. He stood up and strode quickly over to a small set of cabinets against the back wall where the trays and cups for meal service were stored. When he turned back towards the couch he saw her pulling a medium sized flask out from behind one of the cushions she was reclining against. "I picked up this habit from Captain Anderson," she continued, beginning to pour the whiskey into his cup. "He always has a bottle of good American bourbon hidden in his quarters somewhere. So when our mission was complete if we kept it quiet and kept order he looked the other way if we indulged a little in whatever we'd brought on board for ourselves." When his glass was about half full she pulled the flask away, put its top back on and slid it back behind the cushions. "He wanted us to be able to enjoy the little downtime we had as much as we could."

"You took a risk drinking it out here, ma'am," he said, taking a small sip. It was smooth and slightly smoky at first, but after a moment the burn began to creep down his throat. _Nope, not asleep._ "Anyone could've seen it and reported you," he added quickly as the burning sensation spread. _Definitely really happening._

Shepard sighed, reaching out to pick her datapad up again. "I know. But I've never been the sort of CO who could stay cooped up in her office. The walls start to close in on you after a few hours, and no one ever knocks on their commander's door just to say hi and chat about last night's match." She glanced over at him, her lips twisting up into a soft smile. "That makes this a risk worth taking in my book."

"Yes, ma'am," he said instinctively. Her gaze grew sharper, as if she sensed the uncertainty that led him to fall back on the verbal version of 'When in doubt, salute,' but she just shook her head and then turned her eyes back to her datapad. _Say something to her, you idiot_. "Uh…are you still working there, Commander?"

"Two weeks' worth of reports from every forward deployed ship in the fleet," she confirmed, swiping one finger over the surface of the datapad with slightly more force than needed. "The Council says they'll forward all relevant information to Ambassador Udina, but I'm not sure I trust either of their judgments so I figured I better go looking for leads myself. Maybe something will trip an alarm in my head that it didn't trip in theirs."

Kaidan nodded in agreement. "Anything so far?"

"Some reports from Fourth Fleet over in the Armstrong Cluster mention strange attacks – could be Geth," she shrugged. "Most everything else is the usual – pirates, smugglers, slavers, a Batarian patrol or two." She glanced back up at the vidscreen, where the match had resumed. "If there really is an ancient race of machines out there plotting to destroy all organic life in the universe they're doing a good job of hiding themselves."

_Or they're not really there._ He shook his head and took another, smaller, sip of the whiskey.

"Something you need to say, Lieutenant?"

Kaidan started, nearly sloshing his drink onto his shirt. _I didn't say that out loud, did I?_ "Um…off the record, ma'am?"

"Alenko," she sighed, "It's nearly 3 o'clock in the morning, we're off duty, sitting in the O-Lounge, drinking contraband whiskey and watching a football match." She slugged half her drink back before setting her glass down on the coffee table. "I think you can ask me just about anything you want." Kaidan nodded numbly. "I also think," she added slowly, turning towards him, "That you can quit calling me 'ma'am'."

"Yes, ma'am," he said instinctively. "Sorry…Shepard. Habit." He took a nervous sip of his drink, hoping he wasn't about to destroy the trust she'd put in him over the past few weeks in the next few minutes. "It's just that something about all of this doesn't make sense. I mean – a race of ancient sentient machines, galactic extinction…it is a little far-fetched."

Shepard didn't move a muscle, but her eyes didn't rise up to meet his. "Am I to understand that you don't believe it?"

"I – I believe what you say you saw in the vision from the beacon was real," Kaidan began. "But even you said you couldn't make much sense of it, and no one has any idea what this Conduit might be. It just feels like we're jumping off a cliff with no idea how far it is to the bottom. Or what's going to be waiting for us when we get there." He took another sip of his drink to signal that he was finished, bracing himself for her reply.

Shepard held still for a long moment, then took a deep breath. "There's a fine line between waiting to gather as much information as you can to understand a situation before taking action, and waiting so long that someone else ends up making that decision for you," she said pensively. Kaidan must have frowned, because Shepard shook her head and started again. "It doesn't really matter whether we believe any of this or not. Saren and the Geth do. They're already out there looking for this Conduit because they know what it is and they believe the story about the Reapers. If we don't go after them until we're sure – which we may never be – we're taking the risk that they'll find the Conduit and use it. Reapers or no, that alone might make Eden Prime look like a sideshow. But if we have a little faith and follow their path, we should find them and some answers all at the same time."

Kaidan let out a bewildered laugh. _How does she manage to sound so logical about something so ridiculous?_ "Yeah, maybe," he conceded. "Even so, we're just one ship, one crew – provided by our own forces, not by the Council – up against the top Spectre, legions of Geth, and maybe an ancient genocidal race of synthetics on top of it all."

"When you put it that way we may as well take our toys and go home," Shepard drawled.

"Th – that's not what I meant" he stammered nervously. "It's just that…" Shepard arched her eyebrows, waiting. "There's writing on the wall here, Commander, but nobody's reading it," he finished.

"Aren't we?" she countered.

It was Kaidan's turn to sigh. "Trying to, I guess."

"Though it does feel like we're the only ones," Shepard nodded, reaching out to pick her drink up again. "The Council doesn't want to believe anything's wrong. Committing their forces or those of any other Citadel race to this mission would require that belief. I'd call it human nature, but…" Her voice trailed off into another shrug as she raised her glass to her lips.

"I hear you," Kaidan sighed. "It just seems that a group that's been around as long as the Council should see something like this coming." He took a larger sip from his cup – _she seemed to take that well…_ "I mean, we finally get out to the final frontier, and it's already settled. And the residents don't even seem impressed by the view. Or the dangers."

"Final frontier?" Shepard echoed, an amused grin suddenly spreading across her face. "Are you some sort of twentieth-century style romantic, Alenko?"

"Uh, I read a lot of those books when I was a kid," he said cautiously, taking another, larger sip. _Is this a good thing or a bad thing?_ "Hero goes to space, to prove himself worthy of the woman he loves, or…you know, for justice." He'd felt his cheeks start to burn halfway through his words – why did she make him so nervous? Why couldn't he just have a normal conversation with her, officer to officer? "I didn't enlist until I was twenty-two, so I didn't sign on for the dream. I just wanted to see what's out here, to do some good."

She nodded slowly, setting her datapad down on the table and turning to face him. "You said you went to the Academy, right?"

"Enlisted in '73, graduated with high honors and the rank of cadet company commander in '75," he replied automatically.

"I'm not interested in having a conversation with your file," she shot back.

"Right – sorry, Shepard," he said quickly, mentally kicking himself for wasting her time with things she already knew. "None of my previous commanders have cared about hearing anything more than that."

"Their loss," she said simply.

Kaidan tightened his hand around his glass. "It's just that I don't usually think of much beyond the job," he said carefully. "And talk about even less."

A shadow seemed to pass behind Shepard's eyes for a moment – but just as quickly as it had appeared it was gone, leaving her gaze focused on him. "Neither do I," she nodded, her voice clear and certain, "But this mission has been unusual since I came on board. I'm not wasting any more energy trying to fight it." She drained the small amount of whiskey remaining in her glass, then reached back behind her for the hidden flask. "You would've been a few years older than most of the other cadets, right?"

"Yeah," he said slowly. "I took a couple of years catching up with my academics and figuring out what I wanted to do with myself after –" _No more tiptoeing around…_ "After BAaT." If Shepard was unfamiliar with that acronym she gave no sign. "That's why I'm still an O-3 at 32."

"Not for long," she murmured confidently as she poured a little more whiskey into her glass before stashing the flask back behind the cushions.

"What about you, Comm – Shepard." She gave him a small smile while taking a sip from her glass. "You said you enlisted on your eighteenth birthday. You must've been pretty motivated to sign up so young."

"In a way," Shepard shrugged casually. "I wanted to get out of where I was and to do something constructive with my life."

"I suppose being a getaway driver doesn't come with much of a retirement plan," he smirked, spurred on as much by the calm in her eyes as by the warmth of the whiskey.

"It does, actually, but it's called prison," she chuckled. "Not that the food or accommodations in the Alliance Navy are much better," she added, her slight smile blossoming in to a full grin.

The words rushed out before his mind could stop them. "You look better in uniform than you would in an orange jumpsuit." He flinched as the realization of how inappropriate his words were made its way from his ears to his head – but she made no reply. "Ma'am." _Do I say stupid things to her because I'm nervous, or am I nervous because I say stupid things?_

"With my hair color? No doubt," Shepard said lightly. Kaidan felt himself began to breathe again. "At any rate, I hadn't been planning to do more than one tour, but then after I'd been in for nearly a year Genvieve talked me into going to OCS. I didn't want to – she practically had to have the MPs carry me to Fort Benning – but to no one's surprise more than my own I took to it." She laughed softly at herself. "Three months later I was a Lieutenant, Junior Grade. The rest, as they say, is history."

"Why didn't you want to go to OCS?" he asked.

"A lot of reasons," she shrugged. "Like I said, I wasn't thinking of the Alliance as a career. I thought I'd just take the free ride away from Earth, save up as much money as I could during my tour and figure out what to do with the rest of my life when I got out." She paused, her eyes losing focus for a long moment. "Mostly, though, I just didn't see myself as officer material."

He didn't hesitate to follow up with another question. "Why not?"

"Going from the life I was in to the life of a marine was a big change," she replied flatly. "My platoon voted me to be their sergeant right out of basic, but even so the idea that I was qualified to be in charge of anything was hard to believe." Kaidan was about to point out that she hadn't really answered the question when her gaze snapped back to him. "Did you think of yourself as officer material when you were eighteen?"

"No," he admitted. "After BAaT the last place I thought I'd end up was in the military." Her eyes narrowed suddenly – she'd let the first use of that term slide by, but not the second. "But by the time I enlisted I knew it was the right decision for me, and I've never regretted it," he finished quickly, steeling himself for what was coming next.

She waited barely a second before pouncing. "What was 'BAaT'?"

He took a deep breath, readying the words he'd been rehearsing ever since it became clear that it was only a matter of time before this would come up. Trying to figure out how she'd react to even half of the story – or which way he wanted her to react – had nearly given him another headache. "'Biotic Acclimation and Temperance' training," he exhaled. Shepard gave him a _never-heard-of-it_ shake of the head. "Though that name didn't last beyond the airlock." "For the kids they hauled in, it was brain camp." Her eyebrows shot up. "Hauled in isn't right," he quickly corrected himself – _you have to get this right!_ – "We were encouraged to commit to an evaluation of our abilities so an understanding of biotics could be compiled."

"Was that an Alliance project?" she asked, frowning.

Kaidan shook his head. "No. Connatix Industries ran it from about 2160 to '68 They used it to implant the first generation of humans with biotic potential and then train us to see what we could do."

Her frown darkened. "Did you volunteer for that?"

"Technically, yes," he muttered. "Nobody knew at the time what the long-term side effects of biotic implants would turn out to be." Shepard gave him a sad nod of her head. "Besides, when you're just a teenager and bunch of guys in fancy suits show up at your door after school, spinning a tale about how you can help humanity take its next great leap into to the future, you buy it. Next thing you know you're being wheeled into brain surgery, and when you wake up you're out on Jump Zero."

"That will make your head spin, even without the implants," Shepard chuckled sympathetically, taking another sip of her drink. "How many other kids were out there with you?"

"A few dozen." Faces and names floated through his mind, especially one… _Should I?_ "The program had been running for a couple of years when I arrived, so some of them had been out there for a while." It was his turn to watch her now, noting every movement of her hands or blink of her eyes. "The training was pretty hard, with very little downtime, but there was a small group of us that would get together before lights out every night and talk," he said carefully. "Mostly other kids who arrived around the same time I did." Her gaze sharpened and her shoulders seemed to tighten and pull back – Kaidan swallowed hard as a sudden chill ran through him. "All the companies that had been on Jump Zero working on the wild-goose chase of FTL travel were long gone and Connatix – the corporation running the project – kept us off the extranet to prevent leaks. There wasn't much else to do," he added.

"Plenty of time to get to know each other, then," Shepard said, her voice again strangely tense.

_Is she…nervous?_ "Yeah," he breathed. "We'd play cards or network games, and sometimes they'd let us watch a vid of a big football match. Never live, though." Kaidan paused, letting the sensation that the room was warming suddenly wash over him before continuing. "There was a girl named Rahna who had a little circle grow up around her," he began carefully. "She was from a very rich family in Turkey. But she was really smart, and charming as hell. Beautiful, but not stuck up about it." Shepard blinked and looked away – _if there's a god out there, please don't let me trip over the line I'm about to cross._ "Like you, I guess. Ma'am," he added softly.

"Sounds like she was special to you."

Kaidan forced himself to take a deep breath as the temperature underneath his fatigues veered from tropical to arctic and back again. Had he imagined hearing a slight tremor in Shepard's voice? Or had it just been the burst of volume from the vidscreen as several blurry figures ran around celebrating that made it seem like her voice had wavered for a moment? "She was, and maybe she felt the same," he started slowly. "But things never fell together. Training. You know." Shepard nodded, the set of her shoulders beginning to relax though her expression was unchanged. "Anyway, that all happened a long time ago." _Emphasis on the 'long time ago'._ He'd been on his fair share of dates in the years since, but Shepard was the first woman since Rahna who could render him breathless with the slightest smile. "And none of it has anything to do with our mission," he finished, figuring he'd done enough damage for one night.

"True. I just wanted to get to know you better, that's all," she said with her usual calm confidence, picking her glass back up and drinking the last few drops of the whiskey. "Thanks."

"You're welcome, ma'am," he said, relieved. "I…" His voice trailed off as her eyes came back up to meet his – the veil that always seemed to mask her thoughts was gone. The Commander, the Spectre, the superior officer was gone. All he saw was a woman with bright green eyes that he couldn't look away from, or stop talking to – and who didn't seem able to keep her eyes off of him, either.

"Yes?"

The same strange tension was back in her voice, but now Kaidan was beginning to think he understood its source. "You, uh…do you make a habit of getting this personal with everyone?" he asked softly.

Shepard didn't seem to move, but Kaidan saw her knuckles turn white against her glass. "No."

"I'll need some time to process that," he said gently, all his nerves and doubts suddenly fading.

The look on Shepard's face changed, and for the first time Kaidan was confident he could clearly read her expression – _I will too_, it said. "It's getting late, anyways," she said evenly, the mask falling back into place as she turned away from him. "We'll have time to talk more later."

"I'd like that," he breathed. She nodded, allowing a slight smile to brighten her features before reaching for her datapad. _Business to personal and then back again_, Kaidan marveled, chuckling softly and shaking his head. _Half the time I don't know where she's taking me next, but I'm definitely enjoying the ride._

"Something to add, Kaidan?" she asked quietly, still staring at her reports.

All the nervous sweats and warm blushes she'd given him before were forgotten as the sound of her calling him by his given name sent a piercing, paralyzing fire coursing through him. "I – you – " He forced himself to pause and take a deep breath. "You're not at all like I thought you'd be," he finally managed to say.

"I see," she murmured, raising her eyes and locking her gaze onto his. "Which version of me do you prefer?"

"The real one," he replied quickly, his voice firm and sure. She wasn't the most beautiful woman he'd ever met – she wasn't even the most beautiful woman he'd ever shared a drink with. But as he stared back into those sharp green eyes his heart raced and his blood burned with an intensity he'd never felt before. "Shepard."

She nodded, smiling softly at him for a moment before turning back to her reports. They watched the rest of the match in near silence, each occasionally commenting on a foul or a missed shot at the goal, but both seemed content to leave the conversation where it had ended for the night. When the final whistle blew Kaidan excused himself and headed back towards his quarters, pausing to look back at her one last time before he moved out of sight. She seemed to be focused in on her datapad again, but just before he turned to go he saw her head tilt slightly in his direction, as if she wanted to let him know that she knew he was still there. He smiled and shook his head – _what am I getting myself into? _– before slowly and reluctantly walking away.

* * *

"Logged: the Commanding Officer is ashore. XO Pressley has the deck," the Normandy's VI chimed pleasantly as the outer airlock door slid open. It had barely cleared Shepard's head before she marched through it and onto the docking platform, then pivoting sharply to the right and heading for the elevator into Fifth Fleet HQ. Kaidan snuck a glance at the dazzling view of the interior of the Citadel over his shoulder as he followed her, stepping carefully to keep a respectful distance from the Krogan on his left.

He'd been summoned to gear up and report to the command deck shortly after the _Normandy_ had docked, arriving to find Shepard waiting by the airlock with Wrex by her side. Both were also fully armed and armored. "Admiral Hackett just called to say that I should bring the squad from the raid on the _MSV Ontario_ with me," she said flatly, suspicion darkening her eyes.

The _Ontario_ had occupied by human biotic terrorists dissatisfied with the government's decision not to pay them reparations for the disabling side effects their implants had caused. _L2 implants – the same kind I have._ In retaliation they'd kidnapped the chairman of the committee that had made that decision, intending to kill him before Shepard, Kaidan, and Wrex had boarded the _Ontario_ and put an end to their plans. "Did he say why?" Kaidan asked, glancing over at the krogan. Wrex was the typical walking tank that every krogan seemed to be, but he was also a powerful biotic – a rare trait among his people, and one Shepard had been only too happy to take advantage of when storming a ship full of human biotics.

"Of course not," Shepard snorted. "Let's get this over with."

They waited for the elevator in silence, but as soon as its door slid shut behind them Kaidan turned to the commander. "I wasn't aware full combat gear was the proper attire for a meeting with an admiral, ma'am," he said cautiously.

"Psychological warfare, Lieutenant," she replied. "Looking like we have places to go and people to kill might influence Admiral Hackett to keep this short. Besides," she continued, turning her head to gaze down on the tree-filled atrium below the descending elevator, "Last time we walked around the Citadel unarmed we were jumped by Saren's agents. I'm not getting caught out like that a second time."

"The way Garrus tells it you two flattened them with your biotics anyway," Wrex rumbled.

"And still can," Shepard countered. "Except with our armor on we can afford to take a bullet or two in the process."

Wrex grunted his agreement, crossing his arms over his chest. "So tell me," he began, glancing at Kaidan, then Shepard, and then back to Kaidan, "Who'd win in a fight between you and Shepard?"

"What?" Kaidan coughed.

Shepard chuckled, leaning back against the wall. "Relax, Lieutenant. He's asking everybody this."

"Commander Shepard is my superior officer," he said, trying not to sound too confused. "I can't imagine us ever having to fight."

The krogan's long, thin lips twisted up into a derisive grin. "You can't?" Kaidan shrugged – what else was he supposed to say? "That's why Shepard is your superior officer," Wrex growled. "And that's why Shepard would win."

"Has anyone said 'yes'?" Kaidan muttered, shaking his head.

"No," Wrex drawled. "Haven't asked the Turian yet, though."

"And if he does?" Shepard asked quickly.

Wrex laughed. "I'll tell him to prove it. Shepard's eyebrows shot up. "Hand-to-hand in the cargo bay. No weapons or biotics."

"Come on, at least let me throw up a barrier," the commander protested. "Garrus has an exoskeleton – all I've got is skin."

"I'll put a hundred credits on Garrus," Kaidan coughed softly.

The commander's eyes narrowed into thin slits, though her grin failed to disappear completely. "Watch it, Lieutenant, or you'll find a warp field headed your way."

_She said not to be afraid of her…_ "Lucky for me my barriers are stronger than yours," Kaidan dared to smirk in reply.

"Are you sure about that?" Shepard shot back, the smile on her face growing in spite of her attempt to sound angry.

Kaidan leaned back against the wall, grinning back at Shepard. "I've seen your barriers in action, Shepard. Tissue paper would've done just as well."

Wrex's customary scowl suddenly twisted up into a bemused grin. "Maybe you could hold your own in a fight with Shepard after all," he drawled, giving Kaidan a surprisingly respectful nod. "At least for a few minutes."

Shepard let out a clear, uncomplicated laugh as Kaidan shook his head. "Thanks, I guess," he muttered as the elevator began to slow. _I could listen to her laugh all day long…_

"Don't put your credits on me just yet, Wrex," Shepard cautioned, still laughing. "He's got at least 50 kilos on me, not to mention a stronger biotic implant."

"Aren't you an L2, Shepard?" Wrex asked, his features closing together.

"Nope," she chirped. "L3."

Still frowning suspiciously, Wrex glanced between the two humans again. "Then why do your powers seem to be equal to his?"

"The memories I use to trigger my abilities are very strong," she said lightly.

_A little too lightly_. "It is rare for an L3 to spike as high as an L2," Kaidan confirmed slowly as the elevator began to slow. He snuck a glance at Shepard to see that her eyes were studiously focused on the door. Trigger memories could be anything, but the ones that worked best were connected to times when you'd been angry or afraid, especially when it came to triggering the offensive powers military biotics used most. The stronger the emotion associated with the memory, the stronger the biotic power generated would be. _There's a story there_. "In fact, you're the only one I think I've ever met," he added. _ A conversation for another late night and a few more glasses of whiskey._

The short walk from the elevator and through the atrium to Admiral Hackett's office passed in silence, though the commander did chuckle every time a staffer let out a startled yelp at the sight of Wrex. Upon arrival the Admiral's secretary showed them straight into his office – _not a good sign_, Kaidan sighed. Admirals usually loved to keep their guests waiting for at least a few minutes – even someone like the famous Commander Shepard – if only to impress upon their visitors who was in charge.

Admiral Hackett stood up and began to come out from behind his desk as soon as Shepard led the group into the room, stumbling slightly once Wrex made his way through the door. Another officer was sitting in one of the chairs in front of the desk – he stayed in his seat even as Shepard and Kaidan snapped to attention and saluted. "Admiral, sir," the commander said crisply after Hackett returned the gesture, turning towards Kaidan. "This is the _Normandy_'s squad commander, Lieutenant Kaidan Alenko." Kaidan nodded even as he lowered his arm, willing himself to stay calm as Hackett's steely gaze swept over him. "And the third member of the team from the _MSV Ontario_, Urdnot Wrex."

Hackett met Wrex's blood red eyes straight on. "We don't need to speak with the Krogan," he said evenly.

"Why don't you go keep yourself occupied for an hour or so," Shepard said to Wrex in a low voice, stepping a few feet away from the admiral. "Without drawing any attention from C-Sec."

Wrex nodded. "You'll find me in Chora's Den when you're finished."

"Are you sure you'll be welcome there, seeing as last time you put a bullet between the owner's eyes?" Shepard whispered.

"New management is always happy to show its gratitude to those who put the 'X' on the ex-management," Wrex grinned.

"So much for the 'not drawing attention from C-Sec' part," Kaidan muttered softly.

Wrex's grin only grew longer. "I only get arrested when I want to be." Shepard didn't seem totally convinced, but gave him an approving nod anyway. "I'll be waiting," the Krogan rumbled, giving Kaidan and the admiral both a respectful glance before heading back through the door.

"What can we do for you, Admiral?" Shepard asked quickly.

Hackett cleared his throat with a soft cough. "Before we get started let me introduce Lieutenant Commander Norris, from the Intelligence and Special Operations Command." The other officer in the room, a thin blond man who couldn't be older than thirty, finally stood and gave Shepard a lazy salute. She returned the salute with a sharp snap of her arm and a suspicious gaze. "He's really the one with the questions," the admiral said, waving the group towards a small collection of chairs and a couch around a low table in a corner of the room.

"Good morning –"

"Which directorate?" Shepard's voice cut in.

"The Directorate of Intelligence," Norris said pleasantly, dropping into a chair against the wall and pulling a datapad out from inside his uniform jacket.

"Which branch?" Shepard asked, settling into the chair directly opposite from the lieutenant commander. Kaidan chose a chair that was between them but closer to Shepard, while the admiral perched on the near end of the couch.

Norris' smile wavered slightly. "The Internal Intelligence and Analysis Branch."

"Which section?" the commander continued, her voice taking on the studiously light tone that Kaidan knew belied a growing anger.

The intel officer's eyes slid over Kaidan momentarily before returning to Shepard. "The Biotic Tracking and Assessment Section." She leaned back in her chair but said nothing in response. "As I was saying," the intel officer continued rapidly, "Good morning, and thank you for coming. I just have a few questions to ask about the biotic terrorists you recently encountered while successfully rescuing Chairman Burns. For which, of course, you and your crew have the thanks of a grateful Alliance. Lieutenant Alenko –" he shifted in his seat to face Kaidan directly, brightening his smile so suddenly Kaidan nearly snorted in disgust – "Let's begin with you." He glanced down at his datapad, scrolling through document on the screen several times. "You have had previous contact with terrorist groups like this one, yes?" he asked, still reading through the apparently lengthy document.

Kaidan cleared his throat nervously. "Ah, I guess. I've gotten two or three emails over the years from anonymous sources claiming to be agitating on behalf of biotics and inviting me to contact them. I forwarded them to the intel officer attached to whatever unit I was with at the time and then deleted them." He waited while the Norris continued to study his datapad – _that's got to be my file_. BTAS kept detailed records on every implanted biotic, tracking their activities to ensure biotic abilities were not being used for unauthorized or illicit purposes. They hadn't been around when he'd first gotten his implant and gone to Jump Zero – and he was pretty sure Connatix had never turned over their full records of what had happened out there to the Alliance – but when he'd resurfaced and enlisted he'd had to register with BTAS.

"'On behalf of biotics', you said?" the officer repeated slowly, looking up at Kaidan. "Were they more specific than that?"

"Yes," he replied tersely. "They referred to the grievances of L2's and said they were planning to take appropriate action to remedy them." He stole a glance at Shepard – she was still leaning back in her chair, seemingly relaxed, but he could see that her eyes were narrowed and her jaw clenched. "There was more in the messages, but I didn't read any further than that," Kaidan added.

The intel officer pursed his lips and looked back down at the datapad. "It says here in your file," he began, glancing up with a smirk as if hoping to catch Kaidan in a moment of surprise and fear – _three steps ahead of you, dumbass_, Kaidan smirked right back – "That the side effects you experience as a consequence of having a L2 implant are rather mild. Migranes and the like. Is that true?"

Kaidan nodded curtly. "Yes." _My file's pretty boring - enjoy_, Kaidan thought, more bitterly than he would have a few minutes before. Out on a cruise he could lose himself in the job, in the mission, in the camaraderie of marines who'd just cheated death together for the hundredth time. A few of his previous CO's hadn't wanted any biotics, let alone an L2, on their ship and quietly got him reassigned, but they were from the old guard that was nearly all retired now. Thankfully, each of those reassignments to friendlier units had worked out in his favor in the end. It was the civilian universe that held the thousand small, inevitable reminders of how suspicious the rest of humanity was of biotics, L2's or not – registers, files, the random visits from BTAS inspectors that civilian biotics were subjected to. The last time Kaidan had gone home on shore leave he'd had a small static electricity discharge at a restaurant near his parents' house – the waitress who was serving their table had let out a scream and ran to the back of the restaurant, refusing to come back for fear of being 'contaminated'. The manager had quickly apologized and assigned another server to their table, but the happy mood of a few days at home had been ruined.

"It also says you were part of the BAaT program out on Jump Zero all those years ago," Norris asked, trying to act nonchalant while his eyes watched Kaidan carefully. "How was that?"

_They don't know anything._ "Fine," he said evenly. He'd heard the question from BTAS inspectors before, and each time he could tell it was little more than a fishing expedition. _If they really knew, they wouldn't have to ask._

Norris glanced over at Shepard as if hoping that she'd prompt her subordinate to elaborate, but the commander's gaze seemed to be fixed on an abstract painting hanging on the nearby wall. "Alright. Well, if you don't mind," Norris said, giving Kaidan another brilliant but fake smile, "I'd like to ask some questions about your exchange with the terrorists on the _Ontario_. I'll be using this," he continued, pulling a small device out from a gear pack stashed beside his chair and setting it on the table, "To monitor your reactions to my questions and the non-verbal elements of your answers."

"A lie detector." Shepard's voice was as sharp as Kaidan had ever heard it.

The intel officer seemed surprised by her interjection. "Simply a precautionary measure."

Shepard crossed her arms over her chest, her expression darkening. "What exactly are you cautioning against?"

"I'd like to ensure that Lieutenant Alenko's account of any contact, even unwittingly, that he may have had with these terrorists in the past is accurate," Norris said smoothly. "Surely you as his commanding officer can appreciate the need to be certain that those we serve with are honest and trustworthy."

"Do you have any evidence that leads you to suspect Lieutenant Alenko is involved with these groups?" Shepard asked slowly, sitting forward in her chair.

Norris paused, glancing from the commander to the silent and expressionless admiral before replying. "Similar groups – forerunners of the current organizations – have attempted to contact him in the past –"

"The register's public," Kaidan snapped. Yet another indignity biotics endured on behalf of the supposed need to protect their neighbors from unknowingly living or working near one of them – their names, their profession and employer, even their home addresses were published in a searchable database. "Anybody with a connection to the extranet can look it up and see my name and that I'm in the Alliance Navy – it doesn't take a genius to figure out that sending a message to Kaidan-dot-Alenko-at-alliance-dot-navy-dot-mil will get through to me." He took a breath to calm himself. "That's what all my intel officers told me after I forwarded the messages to them," he continued, forcing himself to speak slower. "They figured these groups were just pulling names off the register, guessing their email addresses and sending out thousands of messages, fishing for anyone who'd respond." He turned his gaze to Shepard, looking her squarely in the eyes. "I didn't."

"That may be true," Norris said quickly, "However –"

"What evidence do you have?" Shepard repeated, anger creeping into her voice as she emphasized the word 'evidence'. "And don't try to tell me it's classified – I doubt there's so much as a comma in all of your files that I'm not cleared to see."

Norris swallowed hard, suddenly realizing this meeting was spinning out of his control. "We have no direct evidence that suggests Lieutenant Alenko is currently involved with a terrorist group," he admitted tersely.

"So why are we here?"

"He is an L2," Norris said with a small, condescending laugh.

"I'm aware of that," Shepard snarled coldly.

Norris flinched as if slapped, his empty smile twisting into a more genuine glare. "The Chairman was traveling from Earth to Terra Nova on an Alliance military transport," he said flatly. "One of those crewmembers – a L2 biotic – was in league with the terrorists and helped them board the _Ontario_ and seize the Chairman. We are of course interrogating them all quite thoroughly to determine what other cells might be out there, other biotics planted in key units, all waiting for the right time to strike." A chill ran through Kaidan as he thought of the various interrogation methods, both legal and what-the-public-doesn't-know-won't-hurt-them barely legal, that cold-blooded operatives like Norris had at their disposal. "But that might take some time," Norris continued, "So we thought it best to question every L2 on the register in case anything shakes loose. Starting with those who, like our little traitor, are in the military."

"So the reason you've dragged the Normandy all the way back here is because he's an L2," Shepard said slowly, her voice taking on a soft, dangerous tone. "Nothing more."

"Some of the terrorists have turned out to be L3's, filled with righteous anger at the treatment of their fellow biotics and convinced they will suffer a similar fate if anything goes wrong with their implants," Norris rattled on, mistaking the quiet in her voice for acceptance rather than the calm before the storm. "We will have to start canvassing all L3's now, too, but our statistics show that focusing on the L2 population will yield better results."

"You are aware that I'm an L3 biotic, aren't you?" Shepard asked, her eyes so narrowed Kaidan could barely see their color.

"Ah – well, yes," Norris stammered, a dark red flush sweeping across his face. "Not that anyone would ever suspect someone like you, Commander."

Shepard tapped a finger against the side of her chair. "You approved this, Admiral?"

"I was asked to set up the meeting," Hackett said quickly, glancing warily between Shepard and Norris. "I was assured it wouldn't take up much of your time," he finished, directing his final words at the lieutenant commander.

"Things should move along if the interruptions are at an end," Norris said smoothly, his sickly sweet smile back in place. "Now, Lieutenant, I'm going to turn this on and –"

The commander stood up suddenly, gesturing at a stunned Kaidan to follow. "This meeting is over." Kaidan scrambled to his feet, trying not to grin as Norris's jaw fell open in shock. "My apologies, Admiral," she continued evenly, "But Lieutenant Alenko and I need to get back to our ship. We can't afford to be sitting here responding to baseless accusations when we need to be out in the Traverse hunting down a rogue Spectre."

Norris jumped out of his chair. "Staff Commander Shepard –"

"You have no evidence, Lieutenant Commander Norris," she hissed with the same cold fury she'd directed at Saren and Ambassador Udina. Kaidan was sure he hadn't imagined the hint of glee in her voice as she noted Norris's lesser rank. "No reason to question him other than the brand of implant that's stuck in his head. You will not waste my time and you will not waste my officers' time on an Inquisition-style witch hunt." Hackett stood slowly but made no move to intervene. "And let me add that I am deeply and personally insulted by the idea that my loyalty to the Alliance could be called into question, without evidence and without cause, simply because I'm a biotic," she finished, crossing her arms over her chest with a _pick-on-someone-your-own-size_ glare.

"Commander," Norris coughed, taking the bait, "You essentially forced Chairman Burns to promise to reopen the reparations cases –"

"Is that what he said?" Shepard interrupted. Her conversation with Burns had been short, just before another Alliance ship had arrived to take the chairman and the subdued biotics back to Earth. Kaidan had only heard the tail end of it – 'I didn't know they were so desperate,' Burns had lamented, shaking his head. 'Then you weren't doing your job,' Shepard had snapped unsympathetically in reply.

The lieutenant commander pressed his lips together. "Not in so many words, but it was clear that –"

"Burns was a politician whose only goal was to close those cases quickly so he could get back to raising funds for his next campaign," Shepard spat. "He was moved by his kidnappers' desperation to open his eyes and go back to the cases so he can try to do the right thing. I'm sure we all wish it didn't take a violent takeover of an Alliance transport and several deaths to accomplish that, but sometimes drastic action is required to pull someone's head out of their ass."

"Yes, yes, of course," Norris nodded, reaching back down for the monitoring device that lay on the table. "If I could just ask you a few questions about your interaction with the kidnappers –"

Biotic energy surged down Shepard's right arm, lifting up the device and holding it suspended in mid-air for a moment before she jerked her arm to the side, sending the device flying at the wall just above Norris's head. It shattered on contact, raining jagged pieces of metal onto him while Shepard gazed happily the dent it had left in the wall. "No," she drawled, "You may not." Norris fell back into his chair, his skin paling visibly under Shepard's withering glare. The wicked gleam in her eyes and satisfied smirk on her face spoke clearly – _you mess with my crew, you've messed with me_. "If there's nothing further to discuss, Admiral, the _Normandy_ has work to do."

"That will be all, Commander – Lieutenant," the Admiral said tightly, his face bright red. "Thank you for coming on such short notice. I won't bother you again unless it's absolutely necessary." He saluted Shepard, who returned the gesture before wheeling around and marching out of the office as swiftly as she could without breaking into a run, with Kaidan following just a half a step behind.

She stalked through the Fifth Fleet central lobby and all the way through the security gates before working her jaw loose enough to speak. "Asshole."

"You're not worried that Hackett will write you up for insubordination?" he said cautiously as they made their way towards an elevator to the lower wards.

"Why?" Shepard shrugged. "I didn't disobey any of his orders."

"Technically, yes, I suppose that's true," Kaidan admitted, pushing the button to summon the elevator. "I can't imagine he's happy having to put a maintenance call in for his own office, though."

Shepard crossed her arms over her chest and glared at the floor. "I've handled several special jobs for Hackett since I made N7," she said. "He knows what he's getting when he deals with me."

"And that would be…?" he asked.

She reached out and pressed the button to call the elevator again. "Someone who gets the job done."

"That's not what that scene back in his office was about," Kaidan shot back, surprised by the anger he heard in his own voice.

Her eyes snapped up to his – he clenched his jaw and held her gaze. "Arrogance and ignorance piss me off, especially in combination," she said flatly. "It's hard enough to bite my tongue and not say anything I'll regret when it's directed at me. When they target someone who's done nothing to deserve it…" She shook her head as the elevator finally arrived, stepping into the car as soon as the door slid open. "I don't know how you had the patience to sit there and listen to that jackass for as long as you did," she sighed, pressing the button for the lower wards once the door closed.

The elevator began its rapid but smooth descent – Kaidan grabbed for the railing, still unused to the speed at which the levels flew past the glass walls. "I'm not a famous war hero with a Star of Terra pinned on my chest, and I'm certainly not the first human to be made a Council Spectre," he countered.

"But I am," she smirked, leaning back against a nearby wall. "I cut off his questioning. I smashed his little toy into the wall. So hopefully right now he's so mad at me that he's forgotten all about you."

"And you're not concerned that he'll try to get back at you someday?" he asked carefully.

She let out another small laugh, but this time her smile didn't quite reach her eyes. "If I can handle Admiral Mackenzie I don't think a lieutenant commander will be too much trouble."

_Climbing a little further out on the limb…_ "You don't sound as certain of that as you'd probably like to be," Kaidan murmured.

The smile faltered as she snapped her gaze to him. "You let me worry about that," she said firmly. "Right now, the important thing is he's off your back."

"Thank you for that," Kaidan said softly. _She has put herself at risk_, he thought, watching her glance away as a soft crimson flush appeared on her cheeks. _She knows it…but she'd do it again in a heartbeat._ "You could've just let him turn that device on and ask his questions. I appreciate that you didn't."

"Don't thank me," she replied, waving a hand in the air. "I would've done the same for Wrex, or Garrus, or any of the rest of the crew in the same position."

"No one else on the crew would be subject to a BTAS interrogation," Kaidan said.

Shepard shook her head vigorously. "BTAS, the Council, a nosy reporter with an anti-alien agenda, even the idiots in our own chain of command – it wouldn't matter," she shot back. "I'm your commanding officer. It's my job to keep any interruptions, any distractions, any bullshit like this off my crew's back so they don't spend a second worrying about anything except doing their jobs." She paused, stepping slowly across the elevator until she was directly in front of him. "Unless, of course, you have done something wrong," she intoned, the deadly soft tone he'd heard earlier sending chills corkscrewing down his spine. "In which case you can expect to be hit with a biotic warp field so strong it will bend your head back far enough to touch your heels."

It took a few agonizing seconds to make sure he could reply without stammering. "I'm an Alliance soldier, ma'am. I'd never do anything that would jeopardize my oath to defend the Alliance against all enemies, foreign and domestic."

"Good. Make sure it stays that way," she said evenly, her eyes watching him closely. "I don't react well to being lied to by someone I trust."

"Won't be an issue with me, ma'am," he breathed, enjoying the increasingly familiar surge of warmth that swept over him as she relaxed and gave him a small, almost apologetic smile. "Thank you."

Shepard rolled her eyes, drawing in her breath to unleash another round of 'Don't thank me', but stopped as soon as her gaze came back to meet his. "You're welcome, Kaidan," she sighed, shaking her head. "Though I think I still owe you thanks for your help on that mission – for what you said to those L2's about me."

Voices swirled around in Kaidan's head – the biotic terrorists had been wavering, clearly unwilling to carry through the threat to kill the Chairman but afraid to surrender. Shepard had gotten Burns to say he'd reopen the reparations cases, but it wasn't enough. One of the terrorists had looked over at him, and the words had just poured out – 'I'm an L2, like you. Trust me. The Commander can make sure that Burns follows through.' Everyone but Shepard had seemed surprised, and a moment later the terrorists' leader had lowered his weapon. "Commander…" _She's never second-guessed me, never doubted me…_ He leaned towards her until their arms nearly brushed against each other, making sure to keep his eyes locked steadily on hers. "Don't you think you just did?"

She drew in a long breath as a soft blush spread across her face. "I guess –" The elevator slowed. Both suddenly became conscious of how close they were to each other, taking quick steps apart just before the doors slid open. Shepard gave him a quick _we'll-talk-more-later_ smile, then headed out into the hall.

The areas leading to Chora's Den seemed busier than they'd been before – _maybe the change in management has let people feel it's safe to be nearby_ – and while shocked and excited looks appeared on their faces when they recognized Shepard, the next glance of the weapons attached to her armor wiped those looks away. _Probably a completely intentional side effect of gearing up for the meeting_, Kaidan thought with a soft chuckle. _You get left alone wherever you go afterwards, too._ The crowds thinned considerably the closer they got to the bar, though, reduced only to those hurrying by or those too drunk or poor to have anywhere else to go.

They were approaching the door to the split walkway into the club when a man who'd been leaning against a nearby wall suddenly moved towards them. Shepard glanced in his direction, but kept walking until the man planted himself squarely in front of her. "I don't believe it," he said in a high, nasal voice, staring intently at the commander's face.

"Something I can help you with?" Shepard asked flatly, crossing her arms over her chest and giving the man a glare that would've sent any of the younger members of the _Normandy_'s crew running for cover.

The man smirked, but took a step back. "You probably don't remember me," he said slowly, "But we used to run together in the Tenth Street Reds. Name's Finch." Shepard stayed still, her expression unchanged. "Maybe you don't remember it yourself, running in a gang," Finch continued, glancing over to check Kaidan's reaction – he clenched his jaw shut, hoping he was staring back at Finch with half as much contempt as Shepard. "None of the vids mention it when they're talking about you."

"That was then," Shepard said curtly. "This is now."

"We're not trying to cause you trouble, Shepard," Finch said, giving her a hollow smile. "We just want a favor, for old times' sake." Shepard continued glaring but remained silent. "One of the Reds, Curt Weisman, got picked up by Turians. He's being transported through the Citadel back into Turian space. They've got him in a holding cell at the C-Sec office one level up. We'd like you to talk to the Turian captain there and convince him to release Curt."

"You want me to break him out of jail," the commander said flatly, uncrossing her arms.

"I didn't say that, did I?" Finch shrugged.

Shepard snorted derisively, shaking her head. "What was one of the Tenth Street Reds doing in Turian space?"

"Well, since your days the Reds have expanded," Finch replied. "Merged with the NAME, and then took over the Kontinental Kingz after their leader had an, ah, accident," he said, chuckling softly to himself. "Back home we're still in the same lines of work you remember, but off-planet we do some salvage, a little shipping here and there, that kind of thing."

"Turians generally don't arrest people for working shipping and salvage," Shepard snapped.

The corners of Finch's fake smile wavered slightly at the anger in the commander's voice. "Maybe he had a little red sand. You know how uptight the Turians are." Shepard rolled her eyes so obviously that Kaidan almost forgot to keep glaring at the other man and had to choke back a laugh. "They declared him a problem, and they're shipping him back for a trial. But word has it this Spectre thing gives you some pull with the aliens," Finch continued, lowering his voice. "All we're asking you to do is pull a little for us."

Shepard nodded slowly, then took a step closer to Finch. "I'll tell you what I'm going to do," she drawled, checking Kaidan's eyes one more time to make sure they were on her. "I'm going to visit that Turian captain in the C-Sec office and tell him all about your attempt to blackmail me."

Finch's face turned as red as Shepard's hair. "I knew you'd rat us out, Shepard! Now it's payback time!" he hissed. The commander's eyes narrowed threateningly as her left hand dropped down to the hilt of her pistol. "I can find a dozen Reds who'll swear you hate aliens. They'll say they saw you at anti-alien rallies, heard you chanting slogans, even saw you beating up aliens for fun. Maybe even one or two who can convince a reporter you killed an alien in cold blood," Finch added menacingly.

"The Tenth Street Reds was a street gang full of teenagers just trying to make a few credits any way we could. We weren't an Earth-first movement," the commander snarled.

"Maybe not then, but we are now. You think the vids will make that distinction?" Finch grinned, moving a step closer to Shepard. "Who's going to believe you then? Your alien friends will revoke your Spectre status. You'll be nothing. Unless you're willing to pay, say…500 credits."

Shepard blinked, her face suddenly going blank. "Five hun…" Finch glanced around nervously, the smile fading, rubbing his hands together as she let out a sharp laugh and shook her head. "Oh, Finch," she sighed – then seized him by the arm with one hand while the other jerked her pistol out of its holster and shoved the muzzle into Finch's ribs. "You don't really know anything," she said softly. "And we both know your 'witnesses' wouldn't pass so much as a twentieth-century polygraph test. So you're going to leave. Without your friend, without any money, and without giving anyone giving any interviews." Her voice was as low and cold as Kaidan had ever heard it – his eyes darted around to the handful of others in the hall to make sure none of them were watching. "And if you or any other Red so much as looks at me funny from the other side of a spaceport, you'll find out why all the people who were close to me back then are dead." She dug the muzzle deeper into Finch's side for emphasis. "Got it?"

"Yeah, yeah," Finch barked, terrified. Shepard scowled at him for a long moment, pressing the barrel of her pistol harder into his side, then shoved him away. "I guess an Earth-first movement smearing the first human Spectre wouldn't go over well with the folks back home, huh?" Finch added quickly, clasping his hands together to stop their trembling.

Shepard grinned wickedly. "That's quite the revelation you've had there, Finch," she drawled. "Why don't you go back to the Reds and make sure they see the same light you've seen." Finch nodded rapidly, scrambling away as fast as his legs could manage to move. The commander watched him leave, letting out a breath Kaidan hadn't realized she was holding once several seconds had passed since Finch had vanished from their view. She turned slowly until she was facing him, but it took another few moments before she brought her eyes up to his. "I'm sorry you had to see that," she said tightly.

"He didn't tell me anything I hadn't already figured out," Kaidan murmured quickly. Shepard's eyes dropped to the floor nonetheless, and she raised one hand to rub the back of her neck in what he would've described as a nervous gesture from anyone else. "Are you worried Finch will go back on his word as soon as he's out of range?"

"No," Shepard said firmly. "I recognized him the moment I saw him. He was a hanger-on, a wannabe on the fringe of a gang a couple of neighborhoods further out from mine." She nodded to herself, but her eyes remained downcast. "He didn't really know anything about me."

"How can you be so sure?" Shepard turned her head away from him. Kaidan rewound the encounter in his mind – "He would've asked for a lot more than 500 credits, wouldn't he have?" he asked softly.

Shepard blinked, turning back around enough to see him but not so much that he could look into her eyes. "Yes," she rasped. "And…" She hesitated, swallowing her words. Kaidan took half a step closer to her, tilting his head until he could almost look into her eyes. She glanced over at him once, then twice, before lifting her gaze to meet his. "And he wouldn't have called me Shepard." Then, just as quickly as it had come, the moment was gone – she cleared her throat and drew her shoulders back. "Let's go find Wrex and get back to the ship," she said in her commander's voice, walking away before he had a chance to reply.


	5. Ghosts

Chapter 5 – Ghosts

"Patrol Two checking in," a voice squawked out of Kaidan's comm. "No movement up here. Route to the skyway is still clear. Heading back to your position."

"Copy that, Patrol Two," Kaidan replied, checking the chrono display on his omnitool. It had been about two hours since Shepard's departure from the small cluster of prefabricated buildings calling itself the colony on Feros, and over an hour since her comm signal had gone dark – blocked by a jamming signal from the Geth ship she'd gone to destroy. She'd told Chief Williams and their Geth expert, Tali, to gear up and meet her at the colony's garage, then ordered him to divide the Normandy's marines into two patrols and make sure the Geth didn't bother the colony while she was gone. He wheeled around and resumed pacing from one side of the small open area where the stairs from the docking bay emptied out into the colony to the other, kicking impatiently at the same rocks he'd been booting around for the last hour. The female colonist working on the water mains nearby gave him the same sideways glance she'd given him every time he passed by, then turned back to her work.

The lieutenant and half dozen other marines of Patrol Two came around the corner of the central building that led to the upper and lower levels of the colony. "All quiet here, sir?"

"So far," he confirmed. "Patrol One should be back any minute now."

As if they'd heard their name called, Patrol One appeared. "Everything's clear down below, sir," the ensign in charge announced. "That one crazy guy is still wandering around, but he's not bothering anyone except the rats."

"Yeah, just leave him alone." During her first trip through the colony Shepard had found a lone man in the lower levels, blabbering nonsense and intent on not returning to the colony. She'd warned Kaidan and the marines to let him be with a _can't-save-everyone_ shrug. "Grab some energy bars and take 15 to rest up. Then you'll switch routes and head back out." A muttered chorus of "Aye aye, sir," was the reply as each marine sat down on the most comfortable-looking patch of dirt they could find. Kaidan leaned back against a nearby barricade and reached for his comm switch. "_Normandy_, this is Alenko - any updates?"

"Not since the last time you called," Joker's voice replied with a sigh. "The Geth we can see are starting to move, but we can't tell where they're heading yet."

Kaidan glanced back up at the ruined Prothean skyscrapers visible on the horizon. If he squinted, he could just make out the curved hull of the Geth ship clinging to the side of the shortest tower. "Still nothing from the commander?"

"No," Joker snapped. "As soon as we know something new, we'll pass it on. _Normany_ out."

Kaidan swallowed a sigh, turning off his comm. _She'll be fine_, he told himself once again. Except for a few quick recon missions, this was the first time she'd gone into fire without him by her side since she'd come on board. _Ash is a hell of a soldier, and Tali can turn a Geth into spare parts faster than you can blink._ He knew he should enjoy the relative peace and quiet of patrol duty, that he'd be back by Shepard's side dodging rockets and beating back husks soon enough. But he couldn't shake the fear that something bad would happen because he wasn't there with her, watching her back and making sure no enemy got close to her. _She'll be fine._

"...say, I've been meaning to ask - have you gotten a good look at that Asari?"

"Nah, but I heard Chief Williams talking about her." Kaidan snuck a glance in the direction of the two voices - one of the younger marines and one of the older noncommissioned officers were sitting a few feet away, their backs against the water pipe. "She said those tentacles the doctor's got on her head instead of hair make her look like Medusa."

The older one laughed and shook his head. "Come on, man, you know the Chief doesn't like any of our 'special' guests. Besides, just think - no hair to brush out of your face when she's on top."

"Good point," the younger one nodded, grinning. "Hey -" he leaned closer to the sergeant, "Is it true an Asari can have sex with you just through her mind? Like, telepathically?" he added, failing to lower his voice enough for Kaidan to hear every word.

"Sort of. My brother hit the jackpot on one of the slots at New Vegas, then paid for a night with one of the Asari dancers there. He said..." The sergeant's voice dropped to a whisper. Kaidan leaned his head back against the barricade, not sure whether to be amused or concerned that Liara was still being talked about by the crew more than two weeks after her arrival.

"No way..."

"That's what he said," the older marine chuckled.

The younger marine let out a long breath. "Damn. Well, I need to start hanging around the mess more often. Maybe I can catch that Asari's attention"

"Don't waste your time," the sergeant said quickly. "Word is she's only got eyes for Shepard."

"Really?" The younger one laughed loudly enough to draw glances from some of his comrades. "Who'd you hear that from - the Chief?"

The sergeant glanced around nervously, waving the younger man closer to him so he could speak quietly. "No, somebody higher up. Only question is, are the feelings mutual?"

"Everybody up!" Kaidan shouted suddenly, jumping to his feet. He didn't bother to check whether the 15 minutes were up yet or not. "The _Normandy_ says Geth might be heading this way, so let's mo-"

A loud boom suddenly echoed through the air. Kaidan glanced in the direction Sheaprd had gone – a large plume of dust and smoke was rising into the not-so distant sky. "Joker?!" he barked into his comm.

"What the –" the pilot called back. "Hold on!" Kaidan clenched his fists, trying to breathe through a sudden tightness in his chest. "The sensors are coming back online!"

"So what just happ –" Kaidan was suddenly grabbed from behind. Instinctively he twisted out of his attacker's grasp, ducking and using his body to roll the other person off their feet and slam them onto the ground. He scrambled back a few steps, grabbing his pistol and readying to fire. His attacker lay on the ground, dazed - it was the female colonist who'd been calmly working on the water mains nearby. _What the...?_ Several more colonists shuffled into view from out of the central building, their faces as blank and unresponsive as if they were sleepwalking.

The ensign in charge of Patrol One raised his assault rifle. "Sir?!"

"No!" Kaidan shouted, pushing the rifle's muzzle towards the ground. "Back to the _Normandy_, now!" The ensign frowned, confused. "That's an order, Yamada!" This time the ensign turned away and began to run towards the stairs leading down to the docking bay. Kaidan hung back as the others followed, waiting until they were all behind him before throwing a biotic barrier across the passageway's narrow entrance. It wouldn't last forever, but it would keep the colonists trapped there long enough for he and his marines to get back to the ship. "Joker," he barked into his comm as started down the stairs, "What's going on?"

"Hold on – I've got the link with Shepard back up," the pilot replied. "Patching you in."

"Is that you, Joker?" the commander's voice crackled over the comm. The weight in Kaidan's chest lifted. "What's happened to you over there?"

"We're in lockdown here, Commander," Joker said anxiously. "Something happened to the colonists. They're banging on the hull, trying to claw their way inside the ship. They're freaking out!"

"Same thing up here in the colony," Kaidan added. "We're heading back to the _Normandy_."

"Copy that," Shepard said. "They can't do any real damage to the _Normandy_, so just bunker down. The Geth ship is out of commission, so we're on our way back."

"Uh…yeah. Okay," Joker sighed uneasily. "_Normandy_ out."

Kaidan's comm blinked off as he reached the bottom of the stairs. All the other marines were gathered behind a large stack of shipping crates, heads down and guns drawn. "Get down, sir!" one of the corporals hissed. "They'll see you!" Kaidan crouched next to Ensign Yamada, who was clutching his assault rifle so tightly his arms were shaking.

The lieutenant from Patrol Two leaned over. "Should we take them out, sir?"

"No," Kaidan said emphatically, glancing in the direction the ensign's rifle was aimed. The few colonists who'd been in the docking area were, as Joker had said, banging on the Normandy's hull near the airlock door. They bore the same vacant, impassive expressions as their comrades back in the main colony. "Wait here," he said to them, creeping out as far from behind cover as he dared. _Concentrate…gently…_he felt the biotic energy rushing down his arm…_just a tug…_ The biotic field enveloped them, lifting them slowly up before sending them drifting through the air until they were on the other side of the docking bay. His hand closed – the field vanished, dropping the dazed colonists onto the ground. He waved the other marines towards the _Normandy_, glancing back at the colonists to ensure they weren't getting up before scrambling after them.

Once back on board Kaidan headed straight for the cockpit. Joker was sitting in his chair, tapping impatiently at his display screens while Pressley stood behind him, arms crossed and scowling at the deck. "What's our status?"

"Shepard's on her way back," the lieutenant commander muttered darkly, "But something's got her held up."

"What is it?"

Joker shrugged, tapping harder at his screens. "Don't know. I heard her mutter something about 'corporate assholes' and then the assault vehicle stopped moving. Nothing since."

"Everything went to hell when that Geth ship hit the ground," Pressley added. "The sensors did come back online, but –"

Loud and rapid banging noises suddenly echoed through the command deck. Kaidan jumped back a step, grabbing hold of a nearby chair to keep from falling. "They're baaaaack," Joker sighed.

Pressley rubbed his hands together nervously. "The commander was right," he intoned, "We'll be safe in here. She'll deal with those colonists when she gets back." A particularly loud, metallic bang rang out – the colonists seemed to be attacking the ship with more than just their hands. "Let's, ah…let's get some marines up here," Pressley said softly. "Just in case."

"No need," Garrus' raspy voice called out as the Turian strolled down the deck, coming to a stop in front of the airlock. "I've got this covered."

"You C-Sec types couldn't cover a gnat's backside," Wrex's voice interjected. The ringing thuds of his footsteps marching towards the airlock drowned out the noise from the colonists. "Step aside and let a professional handle this."

The Turian's mandibles fluttered in annoyance. "I seem to recall managing to get in your way a few times."

"Only when I let you," Wrex smirked.

"Do you really think –"

"Shepard's on the move again!" Joker shouted from the helm. Everyone turned and moved closer to the pilot, listening intently to his half of the conversation. "Seriously? Assholes." A long pause followed. "Yes ma'am. We'll be waiting." Joker flicked the comm off and swung his chair around to face his audience. "She's inbound, ETA fifteen minutes. Give or take a few Geth. Says she's got a plan for the colonists, so our orders are to sit tight and…well, just sit," he finished with a shrug. Garrus and Wrex both snorted in disgust, each taking hold of their assault rifle and positioning themselves on either side of the airlock. Kaidan traded _what-can-you-do?_ looks with Joker as he dropped into the nearest chair, while Pressley repeated Joker's shrug before starting to pace up and down the deck.

Silence quickly settled over the entire command deck, broken only by the sound of Pressley's boots drawing closer and then moving further away. Kaidan trained his eyes on the rectangular blip moving slowly but steadily along the line leading towards the colony. He kept telling himself not to worry, but each time a set of red blips converged on her position he found himself holding his breath.

Next to him Joker sighed and waved away some of his display screens – though the one showing Shepard's progress remained active. "So, Kaidan," the pilot asked quietly, "What was the deal with going back to the Citadel?"

"It was nothing, really," Kaidan said. "Just some questions about what happened on the _Ontario._"

"We all knew that already," Joker snorted, "But was that really it? No secret meeting with the Council, no rendezvous with another mysterious but helpful alien who'll be taking up residence in the cargo bay?"

_ Just a run-in with BTAS and a blackmail attempt by someone from Shepard's past._ "That was really it," Kaidan replied evenly. She'd started to tell him not to say anything about either incident as they rode the elevator back up to the _Normandy_'s docking bay, but he'd politely cut her off. "If you've got my back then I've got yours, ma'– Shepard," The small, grateful smile she'd given him in reply still lingered just behind his eyes.

"What a waste of time," Joker sighed. "Saren might not even need the Geth to slow us down if Shepard has to keep wasting her time on political bul–"

"Status update, Lieutenant?" Pressley's voice rang out from the other end of the deck.

Joker's head barely moved. "She's half a click out from the colony." A grim sigh rippled through everyone on the command deck as all eyes refocused on the display screens before them or the guns in their hands. Joker turned away and began swiping his hands over his controls as if he could simply click the blinking icon representing Shepard and drag her back to the _Normandy_. Even Liara's appearance on deck caused only a short burst of whispers that quickly faded into the unceasing pounding on the airlock door.

Kaidan was certain Joker had a dozen more questions he wanted to ask, but Shepard had kept the crew moving so quickly that it took nearly all their energy to stave off the fatigue and disorientation that blurred one mission or one day into the next. The moment their little detour on the Citadel had ended Shepard had pointed the _Normandy_ towards Feros, and since then they'd either been under fire or on patrol. This pause, bunkered down and counting the meters between Shepard's position and the ship, was the first chance they'd had to put their thoughts into some sort of order.

Truth be told, Kaidan had just as many questions as the rest of them – more, even, since he'd been witness to the encounter with that 'Finch' who claimed to have known the commander when she was young. _"He wouldn't have called me Shepard."_ Kaidan leaned back in his seat, staring down at his hands as if the answers would be written on his palms. _No cheating on this test_, he thought with a quiet sigh. _If you want to know what he would have called her – and why – you're going to have to ask her._ The sergeant's overheard speculation crept back into his thoughts, prompting a sharp glace over at Liara, standing silently at the back of the cockpit and twisting her hands togther as her eyes stayed glued to the vidscreen. _All those questions she had for me about Shepard...were they really just to figure out how to get close-_

"They're back inside the colony!" Joker called out suddenly. "Patching into the securecams!" A grainy, black-and-white image of the colony's central buildings appeared on his display – all the colonists were standing still, guns in their hands, facing an archway in the far corner of the screen. A dark-haired head peeked out from the other side of the archway – Ash – then vanished again. The colonists began firing at the space where Ash's head had been, but then an arm clad in camouflage-pattered armor appeared on the opposite side of the passageway and appeared to lob something small towards the nearest group of colonists. They looked down, confused, before a flash and a cloud of smoke obscured them from the camera's view. When the smoke cleared, the colonists were lying on the ground. Shepard's arm swung into view a second time, followed by a second grenade detonating in the middle of the next group of colonists. The smoke briefly hid the archway from the view of the remaining colonists – Ash and Tali slipped out and moved quickly to take cover behind some barricades originally set up to hold off the Geth. Shepard tossed a third grenade at some colonists trying to sneak up on their position from the side before sprinting over to join her squadmates.

It was a textbook-perfect demonstration of moving through a field of battle – neutralizing the nearest enemy position with a grenade and covering fire while leapfrogging from one set of cover to the next along a trajectory leading to the objective. As the last group of colonists slumped to the ground a swarm of human-like creatures surged out from one of the side stairwells, their bodies just as twisted and shriveled as the husks on Eden Prime. Shepard stood still, a wave of biotic energy gathering around her before shooting forward to lift the closest husk off the ground and send it flying back down the stairs. She moved behind another set of barricades as she regripped her pistol, and Kaidan watched the heads of several more husks snap backwards just before their bodies collapsed. Though the vid feed they were watching was monochrome Kaidan's imagination filled in the reddish highlights of her hair gleaming when she moved out from the shadows, and the sharp green eyes narrowing as she took her aim. _God, she's..._ Just as she approached the stairs leading down to the docking bay, the last husks falling to a barrage of fire from Ash, his reverie was interrupted by a slight movement and a quiet clearing of the throat from just off to his left. He turned to see Garrus, the Turian's gaze locked as firmly on the vid screen as his own. "Not bad for a human with no exoskeleton," Garrus said, nodding with grim approval.

"Or a redundant nervous system," Wrex added, grinning. "Especially without a helmet."

Kaidan felt all the eyes in the room turn to him. They couldn't have known he'd wondered the very same thing, and worked up the courage to ask her about it just after the mission on Therum. _It's because_ _I'm her squad commander_, he told himself. _I'm supposed to know these things._ "She doesn't like the way it feels," he shrugged, reluctant to divulge anything she'd told him in a private conversation, no matter how benign or business-oriented it might be. "Too confining, too restrictive of her field of vision. If she can breathe, she leaves it off."

"She still has her armor's kinetic barriers, right?" Joker asked, toggling through different securecam feeds as Shepard disappeared down the stairs. "I mean, if I threw a rock at her head it's going to just bounce off of her...right?"

"Yeah" Kaidan nodded. "It'll stop the low-grade stuff most mercs have, but the Geth weapons are another story." On Therum a Geth rocket had sliced straight through the barriers and so close to Shepard's head that it left singe marks in her hair. She'd laughed it off, saying if the Geth wanted to give her a free haircut she wasn't going to turn it down. When the look of concern on his face didn't fade she'd sighed, and reassured him that if she could make it through the Blitz with only her fatigues and a pistol - and no biotics - then a few Geth sqads were nothing to worry about.

Liara sighed. "That's quite a risk."

"She knows," Kaidan snapped, more sharply than he'd intended. Liara frowned and looked away. "She 's decided she can handle it." He turned his gaze back to the vid screen as Joker finally settled on a view of the entrance to the docking bay. No one spoke as they watched Tali's helmet peek quickly over the top of a shipping crate, followed by the camouflage-pattered arm rising up and lobbing one more grenade at the colonists gathered around the _Normandy_'s airlock. The muffled sound of an explosion echoed softly in the corridor behind the cockpit, audible to everyone on deck because the banging on the hull had suddenly stopped.

The airlock door had never seemed to open so slowly as it did now. Shepard looked fine - no visible limp as she stepped onto the deck, no singed hair, no scratches or bruises on her face. "Is everyone alright?" she asked immediately, before she'd finished returning Pressley's salute, her eyes sweeping up and down the deck.

"Yes, ma'am," Pressley replied.

Kaidan thought he saw her shoulders relax a little as her gaze landed on him. "Both patrols made it back?"

"A few of the younger ones are a little rattled," he said, forcing his voice to stay calm despite his racing heartbeat, "But otherwise they're all fine."

"Good," she breathed. "Ash, I want you to go round those marines up, then head back outside to gather up the colonists. They should all be unconscious, not dead, but I don't know how long they'll stay that way. Lock them up in one of the colony's central buildings so they can't do any more damage. Then I want those marines back out on patrol in case the Geth come this way again."

"If they're busy fighting they're not busy getting scared," Ash grinned.

Shepard chuckled. "Something like that." She tilted her head at Liara. "Go with them. If the colonists wake back up we'll need your biotics to keep them under control." Ash and Liara eyed each other suspiciously for a moment before they both turned and strode away. Shepard watched them go, her lips pressed together as if she was weighing whether to say anything more, but after the door to the stairwell closed behind them she turned towards Garrus. "There's a small group of civilians holed up in a room near the top of the skyway. Tali can guide you back there. Take the rover from the main garage and bring them back to the colony."

"I presume you have a plan to turn the colonists uncrazy?" he drawled, his teeth showing in what had to pass for a Turian grin.

Shepard replied with a human one. "We're about to find out. Alenko, Wrex - you're with me."

Wrex laughed, brandishing his assault rifle. "Enjoy being an errand boy, Turian."

Garrus' eyes narrowed. "Or perhaps I'm trustworthy enough that Shepard doesn't feel she needs to keep an eye -"

"I'll get the ruler out later, boys, if it'll make you feel better," Shepard cut in, giving each a look that was half-warning, half-reassurance. "Right now we all have jobs to do." The Turian and the Krogan glared at each other for a few more seconds before Garrus turned away with an audible snarl and stalked into the airlock. Tali scrambled underneath the door to join him just before it closed. Shepard sighed and shook her head. "Pressley?"

"Yes, ma'am?"

"Get a hold of Deputy Undersecretary DeLeon, Alliance Colonial Affairs - and yes, I know what time it is on Arcturus," Shepard said just as Pressley was getting ready to speak. "Tell him you're calling for me and he'll wake up really fast. He's going to need to send an emergency response team here ASAP, along with his best investigators. They're about to have a mess on their hands." She turned back to Kaidan and Wrex. "You two ready?"

"Ready and eager," Wrex grinned.

"All set, Commander," Kaidan added quickly. "But shouldn't Tali be coming along with us? To help out against the Geth?"

"We're not going after more Geth," Shepard said, punching the buttons to reopen the airlock doors. "We have some gardening to do."

Kaidan frowned as the inner door began to open. "Ma'am?"

"A sentient form of plant life called the Thorian. It's tens of thousands of years old, at least. ExoGeni Corporation purposefully built this colony at this location so they could observe the Thorian's effect on the colonists." She stepped into the airlock, then wheeled around to face him. "Something about spores in the air and mind control." Wrex joined her in the airlock, raising his rifle into a ready position just in case the colonists outside were conscious again and waiting to attack.

"That's...great," he replied, suddenly wishing he'd brought his breather helmet. "Do you think we're going to see more of those husks?"

"Yes," she nodded grimly, watching the inner door sliding shut behind him. "I think the plant controls them, that they're what the colonists will turn into eventually." Consecutive metal clangs signaled the closure of the inner door and the opening of the outer door. "That's why I wanted a squad full of biotics."

The colonists who had been assaulting the ship still lay where they had fallen just below the airlock's outer door, peacefully asleep. "So why is this plant telling the colonists to attack us?" he asked as they stepped over the colonists and headed for the stairs.

"Good question," Shepard sighed, taking the stairs two at a time. "If we knew that, maybe we could find a way to end this fight without using pistols as pesticide."

"You don't want to kill it?" Wrex growled.

"Not if I don't have to." She strode quickly through the colony's open areas until she reached a console in the middle. Kaidan took up position behind her, glancing around for any sign of movement from the colonists or husks. "All we really need is to figure out how to get the colonists back to normal and why Saren was so interested in this rock," she continued, punching a few buttons and then watching grimly as a crane lifted a cargo container into the air, revealing a wide stairway hidden beneath. "If we can't do that without killing it, then so be it, but if we can then -"

A single figure staggered around the corner of the central building, the silhouette of a gun in its left hand - "Commander!" Kaidan called out, raising his pistol with one hand while the other reached back for her. Behind both of them he could hear Wrex growl and ready his assault rifle to fire.

"I see him," Shepard said calmly. She stepped around Kaidan and towards the approaching man, her pistol held firmly in her hands and aimed at the man's head.

He lurched a few steps closer to them, then lifted his head far up enough for them to recognize Fai Dan, the leader of the colony. "I tried to fight it, but it gets in your head," he whispered. "You can't imagine the pain."

"We're going to find a way to stop it," Shepard said, her voice lower and gentler than Kaidan could remember hearing before.

"I was supposed to be a leader," Fai Dan said, grief twisting his face. "These people trusted me."

Shepard began moving slowly closer to Fai Dan, taking one hand off of her pistol. "You still are their leader," she intoned softly, her eyes glancing down at the gun in his hands. "You're going to help them get better when this is all over." The familiar shimmer of biotic energy began to envelop her free hand. "You're going to get better."

One step more was too much - Fai Dan jumped back, raising his gun to point directly at Shepard. She stopped, her biotic field vanishing as she regripped her pistol with both hands. "It wants me to stop you…" Fai Dan cried. Kaidan took one hand off of his pistol, his own biotics crackling to life. "But I…won't," Fai Dan choked, his arms shaking as if warring against themselves. The biotic energy sprang from Kaidan's hand - Fai Dan turned the pistol towards himself - "I won't!"

Shepard stood, unmoving, her arms still raised and hands locked around her pistol even after Fai Dan's body had fallen to the ground. The biotic field Kaidan had hoped to use to pull the gun from Fai Dan's hands faded. "I'll make sure there are no other stragglers," Wrex muttered, marching away.

Kaidan waited until she took a step back and finally lowered her arms before approaching her slowly. Her face was as pale as he'd ever seen it - even more than when she'd been unconscious on Eden Prime. "Commander?" She gave no sign that she'd heard him, instead dropping her head to stare at the pool of blood spreading below what remained of Fai Dan's head. "Shepard?" he asked again, stepping close to her. She started, as if for a moment she'd either forgotten that he was there or that she was here. "You okay?"

"Yeah," she said quickly. "Fine." She took a long, deep breath, then whipped her head around and began striding purposefully towards the newly revealed stairs. "Let's go kill this thing."

Kaidan paused. "No more hoping for a peaceful solution?" he asked carefully.

She slowed her stride only long enough to glance back first at him, then at the body on the ground. "No."


End file.
